1 00:00:07,629 --> 00:00:09,698 -* wistful music -[crying] 2 00:00:09,798 --> 00:00:10,799 [Liliana] He wanted to be 3 00:00:10,899 --> 00:00:12,134 buried here. 4 00:00:12,201 --> 00:00:13,535 There's a spot, marked on a map. 5 00:00:13,668 --> 00:00:14,736 I know the spot. 6 00:00:15,870 --> 00:00:17,572 I can't remember his face. 7 00:00:18,307 --> 00:00:20,109 If I were you, I wouldn't listen. 8 00:00:20,209 --> 00:00:21,210 Play it. 9 00:00:21,310 --> 00:00:22,344 [metal straining, clattering] 10 00:00:22,444 --> 00:00:23,878 [Preston] Jesus! Fuck, Paul! 11 00:00:24,012 --> 00:00:25,780 -[Paul] Just hold on. -[Preston] Christ. 12 00:00:26,681 --> 00:00:27,816 Stacy! 13 00:00:27,916 --> 00:00:29,384 Oh, my God. 14 00:00:29,484 --> 00:00:31,753 I heard him die. 15 00:00:32,421 --> 00:00:34,089 [Van] As much as I like sitting here, 16 00:00:34,189 --> 00:00:35,924 it hurts more than you'll ever know. 17 00:00:36,024 --> 00:00:37,926 So, if you're wondering how I feel about you, 18 00:00:38,059 --> 00:00:39,661 I feel enough to sit here and take it. 19 00:00:39,728 --> 00:00:40,929 [Stacy] Abby, 20 00:00:41,062 --> 00:00:42,797 if I were you, I would 21 00:00:42,897 --> 00:00:44,966 set my hooks pretty deep in that one. 22 00:00:45,066 --> 00:00:47,269 They're not making any more men like him. 23 00:00:48,737 --> 00:00:50,239 [laughing] 24 00:00:52,607 --> 00:00:56,578 I wonder if you know how happy this would make him. 25 00:00:57,612 --> 00:00:59,414 It would fill his heart. 26 00:00:59,548 --> 00:01:02,351 Tomorrow, we bury them. 27 00:01:05,887 --> 00:01:09,090 * slow, haunting music * 28 00:01:33,881 --> 00:01:36,017 * music swells * 29 00:01:55,904 --> 00:01:58,039 *** 30 00:02:32,073 --> 00:02:34,175 [Macy] That's an elk track right there. 31 00:02:34,276 --> 00:02:35,310 [Stacy] Oh. 32 00:02:35,410 --> 00:02:38,012 Oh. Look, there's another one. 33 00:02:38,112 --> 00:02:40,549 No, that's moose. 34 00:02:41,350 --> 00:02:42,717 How can you tell the difference? 35 00:02:42,817 --> 00:02:44,018 [sighs] 36 00:02:44,118 --> 00:02:46,855 If you spend enough time tracking, you just know. 37 00:02:46,987 --> 00:02:48,423 Ah. 38 00:02:50,624 --> 00:02:54,763 So, do you have any questions about today? 39 00:02:55,664 --> 00:02:56,631 Like what? 40 00:02:56,731 --> 00:02:57,832 I don't know. 41 00:02:57,932 --> 00:02:59,033 Asking you. 42 00:02:59,133 --> 00:03:01,770 Well, you're gonna bury 'em. 43 00:03:01,870 --> 00:03:03,638 We are, mm-hmm. 44 00:03:03,705 --> 00:03:05,774 Then what happens? 45 00:03:05,874 --> 00:03:07,576 Uh, then 46 00:03:07,676 --> 00:03:10,111 they return to the land. 47 00:03:11,346 --> 00:03:13,515 And their bodies become... 48 00:03:13,615 --> 00:03:15,216 a part of it, 49 00:03:15,317 --> 00:03:18,353 um, and their souls, too, 50 00:03:18,420 --> 00:03:19,254 I guess. 51 00:03:19,388 --> 00:03:21,222 They don't go to heaven? 52 00:03:22,023 --> 00:03:24,626 I think this is their heaven. 53 00:03:25,894 --> 00:03:27,729 Heaven is... 54 00:03:28,897 --> 00:03:30,499 Oh, how do I explain this? 55 00:03:30,565 --> 00:03:31,533 -Um... -Our teacher says 56 00:03:31,633 --> 00:03:33,167 there is no heaven. 57 00:03:33,234 --> 00:03:35,003 You know, I don't know if you've already figured this out, 58 00:03:35,103 --> 00:03:37,237 but do not believe everything your teacher says. 59 00:03:38,072 --> 00:03:39,508 Heaven is 60 00:03:39,608 --> 00:03:43,412 your... perfect place. 61 00:03:43,512 --> 00:03:45,380 For some, it's 62 00:03:45,447 --> 00:03:48,182 ice cream oceans and marshmallow mountains. 63 00:03:48,249 --> 00:03:50,251 -[chuckles softly] -And... 64 00:03:50,352 --> 00:03:53,855 others, it's these mountains. 65 00:03:54,723 --> 00:03:56,157 Does that make sense? 66 00:03:57,258 --> 00:03:59,494 And Grandpa's heaven is here. 67 00:04:00,762 --> 00:04:02,564 I think so. 68 00:04:02,631 --> 00:04:06,468 But if you think he's here, why is everyone so sad he's gone? 69 00:04:06,568 --> 00:04:09,203 Well, his heaven isn't mine, 70 00:04:09,304 --> 00:04:10,872 and... 71 00:04:12,106 --> 00:04:13,442 ...you know, I can't see him 72 00:04:13,542 --> 00:04:16,944 and I can't talk to him and can't hug him, 73 00:04:17,045 --> 00:04:20,449 and he can't hug me, and I... I miss that. 74 00:04:20,549 --> 00:04:22,250 Yeah. 75 00:04:22,317 --> 00:04:23,952 I miss it, too. 76 00:04:24,786 --> 00:04:27,221 But that's why we have memories. 77 00:04:27,288 --> 00:04:29,624 We can revisit all those times 78 00:04:29,758 --> 00:04:31,693 that we did have. 79 00:04:31,793 --> 00:04:34,262 All the talks, all the laughs, 80 00:04:34,363 --> 00:04:36,164 all the hugs, and... 81 00:04:36,264 --> 00:04:39,334 You know, it's like a movie. We can... 82 00:04:40,301 --> 00:04:43,237 We can play it over and over 83 00:04:43,338 --> 00:04:46,307 as many times as we want, 84 00:04:46,408 --> 00:04:48,309 you know, in our minds. 85 00:04:48,410 --> 00:04:49,644 You know what I mean? 86 00:04:49,744 --> 00:04:50,879 I do. 87 00:04:51,813 --> 00:04:55,350 Not the same, though, as a real hug. 88 00:04:55,450 --> 00:04:58,420 No, it's not the same. 89 00:05:00,589 --> 00:05:02,857 * sentimental music * 90 00:05:18,873 --> 00:05:20,375 [Cade] Right here, huh? 91 00:05:21,209 --> 00:05:22,877 [Van] She marked it on a map. 92 00:05:22,977 --> 00:05:24,178 [Cade] All right. 93 00:05:24,312 --> 00:05:26,781 Well, we ain't getting a backhoe down here. 94 00:05:26,848 --> 00:05:30,051 Might be able to get a tractor up from the river, but... 95 00:05:30,852 --> 00:05:32,353 ...not sure what good that'll do us. 96 00:05:32,454 --> 00:05:35,857 No, these holes are getting dug the old Irish way. 97 00:05:35,957 --> 00:05:38,192 Yep. 98 00:05:38,292 --> 00:05:40,361 How the hell we gonna get the caskets here? 99 00:05:40,462 --> 00:05:43,064 Swensons still feed off a wagon, don't they? 100 00:05:43,197 --> 00:05:44,733 That's a good idea. 101 00:05:45,834 --> 00:05:47,569 You want to call or run for shovels? 102 00:05:47,702 --> 00:05:49,971 Ah, you call, I'll run. 103 00:05:50,071 --> 00:05:52,541 [Van] My gelding's just gonna follow you. 104 00:05:53,307 --> 00:05:55,109 Yank off that bridle. 105 00:05:55,209 --> 00:05:56,110 Yeah. 106 00:05:56,210 --> 00:05:58,413 * gentle music * 107 00:06:16,164 --> 00:06:17,899 [Abigail] I am aware. 108 00:06:17,999 --> 00:06:20,234 Yes, I am aware. 109 00:06:20,368 --> 00:06:22,136 We have had a death in the family. 110 00:06:22,236 --> 00:06:24,473 I'm pretty sure the world of girls' volleyball 111 00:06:24,573 --> 00:06:26,575 will survive the week without her. 112 00:06:27,442 --> 00:06:28,977 Yes, you are correct. 113 00:06:29,077 --> 00:06:31,012 I am not factoring how this affects anyone else 114 00:06:31,112 --> 00:06:32,747 even a little. 115 00:06:32,847 --> 00:06:34,483 Fucking school. 116 00:06:35,484 --> 00:06:37,786 Is this gonna be okay? 117 00:06:37,886 --> 00:06:40,421 It's gonna have to do, honey, it's all you got. 118 00:06:41,322 --> 00:06:42,957 Hey. 119 00:06:45,393 --> 00:06:46,628 It's just us. 120 00:06:46,728 --> 00:06:49,197 Okay? There's nobody to be offended. 121 00:06:49,263 --> 00:06:50,965 What did school say? 122 00:06:51,099 --> 00:06:53,301 You're missing a volleyball tournament. 123 00:06:53,401 --> 00:06:55,269 It's okay. 124 00:06:55,369 --> 00:06:56,437 -It's okay. -[sobbing] 125 00:06:56,571 --> 00:06:58,507 Hey. 126 00:07:02,076 --> 00:07:03,845 It's okay. 127 00:07:04,713 --> 00:07:07,381 [crying] 128 00:07:19,060 --> 00:07:20,595 -Hey. -Hey. 129 00:07:28,002 --> 00:07:29,270 Where'd you find cream? 130 00:07:29,337 --> 00:07:32,140 Same shopping center where I found the dress. 131 00:07:32,941 --> 00:07:35,043 I got to say, Bozeman impressed me. 132 00:07:35,143 --> 00:07:38,547 I wasn't expecting to find Donna Karan in the mountains. 133 00:07:38,647 --> 00:07:40,148 -[chuckles] -Found a little something 134 00:07:40,248 --> 00:07:41,983 -for you, too. -Yeah, 135 00:07:42,116 --> 00:07:43,952 Preston would prefer me in jeans. 136 00:07:44,052 --> 00:07:46,688 I think he would find a certain 137 00:07:46,821 --> 00:07:48,657 victory in that. 138 00:07:48,790 --> 00:07:49,991 He deserves a little black dress, 139 00:07:50,124 --> 00:07:51,860 and that's exactly what I got you. 140 00:07:51,993 --> 00:07:54,462 Did the boys say when they would be ready? 141 00:07:54,529 --> 00:07:56,364 They said to walk over at noon. 142 00:07:56,497 --> 00:07:58,032 How are they gonna get them out there? 143 00:07:58,132 --> 00:08:01,169 I didn't ask, and they didn't say. 144 00:08:01,269 --> 00:08:03,071 They just said it was handled. 145 00:08:05,039 --> 00:08:06,575 About two hours. 146 00:08:07,341 --> 00:08:09,343 Preston wrote a chapter on... 147 00:08:09,443 --> 00:08:12,847 telling time from the sun's position. 148 00:08:12,947 --> 00:08:16,785 It's... alarmingly accurate. 149 00:08:17,919 --> 00:08:20,088 The girls asked me to arrange a plane. 150 00:08:22,123 --> 00:08:23,524 When? 151 00:08:23,625 --> 00:08:24,859 Tonight. 152 00:08:24,993 --> 00:08:26,527 Oh... 153 00:08:26,628 --> 00:08:27,696 Okay. 154 00:08:27,796 --> 00:08:29,197 They need closure, honey. 155 00:08:29,297 --> 00:08:31,132 They won't get it here. 156 00:08:31,199 --> 00:08:34,135 They have lives, and they need to go live them. 157 00:08:34,234 --> 00:08:37,171 I would very much like to plan a memorial service. 158 00:08:37,238 --> 00:08:39,440 He has a lot of friends that deserve a way to say goodbye. 159 00:08:39,540 --> 00:08:40,642 Does he? 160 00:08:40,709 --> 00:08:43,243 He does. And you know that. 161 00:08:43,344 --> 00:08:45,680 We could do it at the Explorers Club. 162 00:08:45,747 --> 00:08:47,749 Okay, just... 163 00:08:47,849 --> 00:08:49,517 How about the apartment? 164 00:08:49,618 --> 00:08:53,254 Have Carbone cater. 165 00:08:53,387 --> 00:08:54,723 He loved that place. 166 00:08:54,823 --> 00:08:56,858 I already called. 167 00:08:56,958 --> 00:08:58,559 You flying back, too? 168 00:09:01,963 --> 00:09:03,564 I have a very worried husband. 169 00:09:03,665 --> 00:09:06,534 He's convinced some distant cousin of the Unabomber 170 00:09:06,635 --> 00:09:07,902 is going to abduct me 171 00:09:08,002 --> 00:09:10,739 and hold me in his basement for ransom. 172 00:09:10,872 --> 00:09:12,907 Depending on the cousin, I'm not completely opposed. 173 00:09:13,007 --> 00:09:14,575 -Oh, stop. -Of course, that's my 174 00:09:14,676 --> 00:09:17,211 warped romance novel version of abduction. 175 00:09:17,311 --> 00:09:19,413 I doubt that's how it would play out, Lili. 176 00:09:19,513 --> 00:09:22,016 That is how it'd play out in my mind after two Percocets, 177 00:09:22,083 --> 00:09:23,551 -so... -[laughs] 178 00:09:23,652 --> 00:09:24,786 You think I'm joking? 179 00:09:24,919 --> 00:09:26,487 -No. -No? 180 00:09:30,925 --> 00:09:32,794 I love you. 181 00:09:37,465 --> 00:09:38,633 There is nowhere I would rather be 182 00:09:38,767 --> 00:09:40,702 than with you when you need me. 183 00:09:40,769 --> 00:09:42,170 I know. 184 00:09:45,840 --> 00:09:47,108 I have a little bottle of Kahlúa 185 00:09:47,208 --> 00:09:48,977 if you would like some lead in that coffee. 186 00:09:49,077 --> 00:09:52,080 Oh. Well, now you're talking. 187 00:09:56,951 --> 00:09:59,120 [door opens] 188 00:10:00,088 --> 00:10:02,190 [bottle clinks] 189 00:10:04,458 --> 00:10:07,295 * contemplative music * 190 00:10:13,067 --> 00:10:15,904 Little more, more. 191 00:10:16,004 --> 00:10:17,706 -Okay. -[chuckles] 192 00:10:17,806 --> 00:10:19,674 Okay. 193 00:10:47,936 --> 00:10:50,138 *** 194 00:11:03,985 --> 00:11:06,554 Of course you packed the perfect dress. 195 00:11:10,424 --> 00:11:11,826 [door opens] 196 00:11:13,294 --> 00:11:16,064 Is there some little black dress tree 197 00:11:16,164 --> 00:11:19,100 by the river that I am unaware of? 198 00:11:20,268 --> 00:11:21,702 Okay, girls. 199 00:11:24,238 --> 00:11:25,439 And Russell. 200 00:11:35,549 --> 00:11:37,786 * mournful music * 201 00:12:06,747 --> 00:12:09,818 -Where are they? -Uh, coming. 202 00:12:09,918 --> 00:12:11,585 Okay. 203 00:12:12,586 --> 00:12:13,521 I'm sorry. 204 00:12:13,587 --> 00:12:15,456 Thank you. 205 00:12:15,556 --> 00:12:16,991 Sorry for your loss. 206 00:12:17,758 --> 00:12:20,628 -Sorry for the snot. -No, it's fine. 207 00:12:26,367 --> 00:12:29,003 I'm sorrier than you'll ever know. 208 00:12:29,938 --> 00:12:30,872 Thank you. 209 00:12:30,972 --> 00:12:33,141 [sniffling] 210 00:12:44,886 --> 00:12:47,021 [crying] 211 00:13:10,478 --> 00:13:12,480 [Swenson] Okay, boys. 212 00:13:26,928 --> 00:13:28,329 Watch your hand. 213 00:13:54,455 --> 00:13:56,424 *** 214 00:14:07,301 --> 00:14:08,802 [grunting softly] 215 00:14:21,149 --> 00:14:22,383 Mrs. Clyburn, 216 00:14:22,483 --> 00:14:24,919 -I'm very sorry for your loss. -Thank you. 217 00:14:27,121 --> 00:14:28,589 Is a preacher coming? 218 00:14:32,093 --> 00:14:33,995 I forgot. I-I didn't-- I-- 219 00:14:34,095 --> 00:14:36,097 Uh... 220 00:14:36,230 --> 00:14:38,066 this one'll be sans preacher. 221 00:14:38,199 --> 00:14:39,267 What's that mean? 222 00:14:39,400 --> 00:14:42,303 -Means we don't have one. -Oh. 223 00:14:42,403 --> 00:14:46,107 Do you have someone to govern the proceedings? 224 00:14:46,207 --> 00:14:47,575 [Stacy] We, um... 225 00:14:49,077 --> 00:14:50,778 This is my first funeral here, 226 00:14:50,878 --> 00:14:54,115 so we're sort of winging it. 227 00:14:54,248 --> 00:14:57,351 Well, this is far from my first rodeo. 228 00:14:57,451 --> 00:15:00,388 Um, do you mind if I say something first 229 00:15:00,454 --> 00:15:02,390 and then give you all a chance to speak? 230 00:15:02,456 --> 00:15:06,294 I don't think my group has many speeches in them. 231 00:15:08,662 --> 00:15:10,264 Do you mind a prayer? 232 00:15:10,364 --> 00:15:12,566 I do not. 233 00:15:17,305 --> 00:15:19,340 [Swenson clears throat] 234 00:15:22,110 --> 00:15:25,213 Lord, we stand before You with heavy hearts. 235 00:15:25,279 --> 00:15:28,816 With the glory of love comes the pain of loss, 236 00:15:28,916 --> 00:15:31,419 and we look to You for comfort. 237 00:15:31,485 --> 00:15:33,054 Remind us that 238 00:15:33,121 --> 00:15:35,323 it is a selfish pain 239 00:15:35,423 --> 00:15:37,958 because You have promised a place called Heaven 240 00:15:38,059 --> 00:15:41,795 where our departed bask in the glow of Your grace. 241 00:15:41,929 --> 00:15:44,232 They are no longer men. 242 00:15:44,332 --> 00:15:46,000 They are angels 243 00:15:46,134 --> 00:15:48,102 who guide us through darkness, 244 00:15:48,169 --> 00:15:51,139 lift us when we are weak 245 00:15:51,239 --> 00:15:53,507 and nourish our souls and spirits. 246 00:15:54,342 --> 00:15:56,144 Our pain is a selfish pain 247 00:15:56,244 --> 00:15:59,147 because we do not know this place, Heaven. 248 00:15:59,247 --> 00:16:01,649 We lean on our faith 249 00:16:01,782 --> 00:16:03,317 that it exists, 250 00:16:03,417 --> 00:16:05,653 and on Your mercy 251 00:16:05,753 --> 00:16:07,488 that it holds a place for us 252 00:16:07,621 --> 00:16:11,325 where we may sit in Your light beside our loved ones 253 00:16:11,459 --> 00:16:15,229 and know only joy forever. 254 00:16:17,331 --> 00:16:19,033 Amen. 255 00:16:19,900 --> 00:16:22,303 Uh, if anyone would like a word. 256 00:16:23,704 --> 00:16:24,972 Stacy. 257 00:16:25,039 --> 00:16:27,741 It's not the first time you've given that speech. 258 00:16:28,642 --> 00:16:30,344 No, ma'am. 259 00:16:30,444 --> 00:16:32,080 [Stacy] It's a good one. 260 00:16:33,814 --> 00:16:35,716 You care to say something? 261 00:16:37,318 --> 00:16:41,055 I have plenty to say, but I won't be saying it today. 262 00:16:49,863 --> 00:16:51,499 Guess that's it, then. 263 00:16:53,301 --> 00:16:54,402 Um... 264 00:16:54,502 --> 00:16:56,137 [sniffles] 265 00:16:56,237 --> 00:16:57,871 So, what happens now? 266 00:16:58,672 --> 00:17:00,174 We'll take care of everything. 267 00:17:00,241 --> 00:17:01,842 [mouths] 268 00:17:04,478 --> 00:17:06,647 Wait, that's it? That's-that's it? 269 00:17:06,747 --> 00:17:08,616 If you have something to say, then say it, Paige. 270 00:17:08,715 --> 00:17:10,384 I-I don't know what to say. 271 00:17:10,484 --> 00:17:12,320 Wh-What are you supposed to say? 272 00:17:12,419 --> 00:17:14,254 I think that's her point. 273 00:17:18,426 --> 00:17:19,592 Which one's Paul? 274 00:17:29,537 --> 00:17:32,173 Goddamn you for taking him from us. 275 00:17:45,419 --> 00:17:47,255 I love you. 276 00:18:00,868 --> 00:18:04,205 [Swenson] Everyone deals with it different, don't they, boys? 277 00:18:05,373 --> 00:18:08,309 [Van] I don't think they're dealing with it at all. 278 00:18:08,442 --> 00:18:10,544 Not yet, anyway. 279 00:18:10,611 --> 00:18:12,346 Who can blame 'em? 280 00:18:17,485 --> 00:18:20,388 * somber music * 281 00:18:24,992 --> 00:18:27,161 [grunting softly] 282 00:18:28,296 --> 00:18:29,963 Thank you. 283 00:18:54,154 --> 00:18:56,957 [indistinct chatter] 284 00:19:11,605 --> 00:19:15,343 Pretty sneaky, trying to have a funeral and not tell anybody. 285 00:19:15,443 --> 00:19:16,810 Oh, I... 286 00:19:16,877 --> 00:19:20,514 I-I didn't know anyone would care. I-- 287 00:19:20,614 --> 00:19:21,949 We let you have the funeral. 288 00:19:22,015 --> 00:19:24,117 We will not be denied our feast. 289 00:19:24,184 --> 00:19:25,686 [chuckles] 290 00:19:26,487 --> 00:19:27,555 [Bill] When they decided 291 00:19:27,688 --> 00:19:28,922 to build these cabins, 292 00:19:29,022 --> 00:19:30,724 they wanted to do it all themselves. 293 00:19:30,824 --> 00:19:32,660 Mill the wood, frame it, 294 00:19:32,726 --> 00:19:34,462 rough in the electric, the whole deal. 295 00:19:34,528 --> 00:19:36,697 Look at the bottom of 'em there. 296 00:19:36,797 --> 00:19:38,799 They're sitting on railroad ties, 297 00:19:38,866 --> 00:19:40,067 and I could not figure out 298 00:19:40,200 --> 00:19:42,135 what in the hell purpose that would serve. 299 00:19:42,202 --> 00:19:44,872 And I told 'em they're gonna be colder than the devil in winter, 300 00:19:45,005 --> 00:19:47,575 and every skunk and raccoon and God knows what else 301 00:19:47,675 --> 00:19:49,510 is gonna set up shop underneath them. 302 00:19:49,610 --> 00:19:52,212 Well, Preston just looked at me and nodded. 303 00:19:52,313 --> 00:19:53,514 Didn't say a word. 304 00:19:53,581 --> 00:19:55,649 About six months later, 305 00:19:55,749 --> 00:19:57,485 tax assessor comes by my place and says, 306 00:19:57,585 --> 00:20:00,187 "Have you seen these cabins they built next door?" 307 00:20:00,254 --> 00:20:01,555 I said I had. 308 00:20:01,655 --> 00:20:04,057 And he asked me if I'd ever seen 'em move. 309 00:20:04,191 --> 00:20:06,727 I said, "Move? What do-what do you mean, move?" 310 00:20:06,860 --> 00:20:10,598 Tax assessor says, when he tried to put a value on 'em, 311 00:20:10,698 --> 00:20:13,133 your husband said they was mobile homes. 312 00:20:13,233 --> 00:20:15,002 -[laughing] -You pick 'em up with a forklift 313 00:20:15,102 --> 00:20:16,304 and move 'em. 314 00:20:16,404 --> 00:20:18,672 And asked me if I'd ever seen 'em be mobile. 315 00:20:18,739 --> 00:20:20,107 Well, I told him, 316 00:20:20,240 --> 00:20:22,175 "Well, yeah, they haul 'em all over the place." 317 00:20:23,043 --> 00:20:25,446 And if you look at the back of that outhouse, 318 00:20:25,546 --> 00:20:28,248 your husband nailed tires from a shopping cart 319 00:20:28,349 --> 00:20:30,551 and said that son of a bitch was mobile, too. 320 00:20:30,618 --> 00:20:32,753 [Bill laughs] 321 00:20:32,853 --> 00:20:34,788 He did not want to pay any taxes. 322 00:20:34,888 --> 00:20:36,223 I wondered what those were for. 323 00:20:36,290 --> 00:20:39,259 Preston always had issues with authority. 324 00:20:39,393 --> 00:20:41,929 Wheels on the outhouse. Never seen anything like it. 325 00:20:42,029 --> 00:20:44,131 -No. -[Bill chuckling] 326 00:20:44,231 --> 00:20:47,801 Indian tacos. Good stuff. 327 00:20:47,901 --> 00:20:49,202 Want some? 328 00:20:49,269 --> 00:20:51,305 Mm, how about some of those cookies? 329 00:20:51,439 --> 00:20:53,941 Ah. Good choice. 330 00:20:54,041 --> 00:20:56,910 I was thinking, like, three. 331 00:20:57,778 --> 00:20:59,813 What's your mom gonna say about that? 332 00:20:59,947 --> 00:21:01,315 My mom's not gonna say anything 333 00:21:01,449 --> 00:21:02,950 'cause she's not gonna see me eat 'em. 334 00:21:03,050 --> 00:21:04,718 Let's keep this between us. 335 00:21:04,785 --> 00:21:06,053 [chuckles] 336 00:21:06,119 --> 00:21:07,888 I think that's a good idea. 337 00:21:07,988 --> 00:21:10,157 * gentle music * 338 00:21:19,833 --> 00:21:21,835 -[Abigail] Thank you for today. -[Van] Mm. 339 00:21:21,935 --> 00:21:23,804 [Abigail] It means more than you know. 340 00:21:23,904 --> 00:21:26,874 Someone had to do it for me. I know what it means. 341 00:21:28,576 --> 00:21:31,111 I'm sorry it had to be done. 342 00:21:31,912 --> 00:21:33,213 We're flying out tonight. 343 00:21:33,313 --> 00:21:34,648 Girls have missed enough school, 344 00:21:34,748 --> 00:21:36,149 and I have exhausted my wardrobe. 345 00:21:36,249 --> 00:21:38,419 -Mm. -But... 346 00:21:41,355 --> 00:21:42,990 ...I'd like to come back. 347 00:21:43,090 --> 00:21:44,758 Or... 348 00:21:44,825 --> 00:21:46,960 dare I invite you to New York? 349 00:21:47,060 --> 00:21:48,662 [chuckles] Well, the only way 350 00:21:48,796 --> 00:21:51,432 you get me to New York is if it seceded from the Union 351 00:21:51,499 --> 00:21:53,266 and I was drafted into the army to take it back. 352 00:21:53,367 --> 00:21:55,168 Okay, you got to go a little easier 353 00:21:55,268 --> 00:21:57,037 -on my city, buddy. -[chuckles softly] I'm-I'm... 354 00:21:57,170 --> 00:21:58,138 I'm not knocking it. 355 00:21:58,205 --> 00:21:59,607 I'm just not going there. 356 00:21:59,707 --> 00:22:01,875 Fair enough. 357 00:22:02,009 --> 00:22:03,611 Then I'll come visit. 358 00:22:04,545 --> 00:22:05,613 Sure. 359 00:22:05,679 --> 00:22:08,081 I mean it. 360 00:22:09,450 --> 00:22:11,084 Okay. 361 00:22:12,152 --> 00:22:13,821 I mean it. 362 00:22:16,624 --> 00:22:18,759 Hmm. 363 00:22:20,193 --> 00:22:23,397 I'm a sheriff's deputy who makes $52,000 a year. 364 00:22:23,497 --> 00:22:26,900 I have $12,000 in the bank, and I'm about to spend six of it 365 00:22:27,034 --> 00:22:28,536 on a pretty average rope horse. 366 00:22:28,636 --> 00:22:30,671 Three nights a week, I'm gonna load him in a trailer 367 00:22:30,771 --> 00:22:32,239 and drag him all over Montana 368 00:22:32,372 --> 00:22:33,874 trying to win back what I spent on him. 369 00:22:33,974 --> 00:22:36,043 In October, I'm gonna take my boys in the mountains 370 00:22:36,176 --> 00:22:38,211 for a month and fill our freezer with elk. 371 00:22:38,345 --> 00:22:40,347 I ain't never laying on no beach. 372 00:22:40,414 --> 00:22:42,883 I'm never going to Europe, 373 00:22:42,983 --> 00:22:45,486 or San Francisco or any city bigger than Billings. 374 00:22:45,586 --> 00:22:47,921 Ever. 375 00:22:48,055 --> 00:22:49,890 What part of that sounds good to you? 376 00:22:49,990 --> 00:22:52,225 -None of it. -Now, walk me through your life. 377 00:22:52,325 --> 00:22:53,393 What won't you change? 378 00:22:53,527 --> 00:22:54,728 I don't have those kind of obstacles. 379 00:22:54,828 --> 00:22:56,964 I-- Just walk me through it. 380 00:23:00,033 --> 00:23:02,570 Macy has gymnastics every morning. 381 00:23:03,604 --> 00:23:06,239 From there, I go to Pilates. From Pilates, 382 00:23:06,339 --> 00:23:08,542 I go to my therapist. From my therapist, I go to coffee 383 00:23:08,642 --> 00:23:10,444 with my girlfriends to talk about all the bullshit advice 384 00:23:10,544 --> 00:23:12,245 my therapist gave me. 385 00:23:12,345 --> 00:23:15,282 Then I pick up Macy and I get Bridgett and we go to ballet. 386 00:23:15,382 --> 00:23:16,784 We have recitals every Friday night. 387 00:23:16,917 --> 00:23:18,619 Saturday morning, we have competitions. 388 00:23:18,719 --> 00:23:20,087 -Mm. -I take the girls to St. Barts 389 00:23:20,187 --> 00:23:22,022 for Christmas, Italy for the month of July, 390 00:23:22,122 --> 00:23:24,291 which you would love, 391 00:23:24,391 --> 00:23:26,594 I will point out. 392 00:23:30,531 --> 00:23:32,199 Who feeds the horses? 393 00:23:33,033 --> 00:23:34,702 Isn't there a service for that? 394 00:23:34,802 --> 00:23:36,904 You have to do it every day? 395 00:23:37,771 --> 00:23:39,072 Okay. 396 00:23:39,172 --> 00:23:40,741 Okay, there is no future in this, 397 00:23:40,841 --> 00:23:42,676 but you are tall 398 00:23:42,776 --> 00:23:45,513 and kind and fucking beautiful. 399 00:23:45,646 --> 00:23:47,280 You are tall and kind and beautiful. 400 00:23:47,380 --> 00:23:50,150 Okay. So can we just agree to fuck this up together 401 00:23:50,250 --> 00:23:51,852 and have as much sex 402 00:23:51,952 --> 00:23:53,320 -as possible until... -[laughs] Jesus. 403 00:23:53,453 --> 00:23:55,322 -until we can't? -Yeah, 404 00:23:55,422 --> 00:23:57,224 you city girls do spell it out, don't you? 405 00:23:57,324 --> 00:23:59,192 Yeah, we-we... we get to the point. 406 00:23:59,326 --> 00:24:00,694 -Yup, we do. -I go 407 00:24:00,794 --> 00:24:02,095 from wondering when we're gonna see each other 408 00:24:02,195 --> 00:24:04,532 to wondering when you're gonna leave. I... 409 00:24:04,632 --> 00:24:06,166 [sighs] 410 00:24:06,299 --> 00:24:08,368 I think I'd rather just miss you. 411 00:24:10,037 --> 00:24:12,706 -I'm not gone yet. -You know what I mean. 412 00:24:12,840 --> 00:24:14,908 So is this goodbye? 413 00:24:16,977 --> 00:24:18,411 -[scoffs] -I think it's best. 414 00:24:18,512 --> 00:24:20,013 Oh, wow. 415 00:24:21,849 --> 00:24:24,284 Let me just clarify 416 00:24:24,351 --> 00:24:27,888 that you are breaking up with me at my father's funeral. 417 00:24:28,021 --> 00:24:29,790 We-we aren't together to break up. We-- 418 00:24:29,890 --> 00:24:31,291 No, no, no, we seemed pretty together yesterday when 419 00:24:31,391 --> 00:24:32,793 -you were lying on top of me. -Abby, I-- 420 00:24:32,893 --> 00:24:34,895 Don't fucking "Abby" me now. 421 00:24:34,995 --> 00:24:36,296 You want to miss me? 422 00:24:36,396 --> 00:24:38,298 Is that what you want? 423 00:24:38,365 --> 00:24:40,000 Here's your fucking chance. 424 00:24:40,100 --> 00:24:42,570 * melancholy music * 425 00:24:57,885 --> 00:24:59,553 [door closes] 426 00:25:03,924 --> 00:25:05,559 Oh. 427 00:25:09,663 --> 00:25:11,431 It's time to go home, isn't it? 428 00:25:12,866 --> 00:25:14,968 It's been time, honey. 429 00:25:42,195 --> 00:25:44,898 [paper rustling] 430 00:25:49,269 --> 00:25:52,372 When did your father die, Russell? 431 00:25:53,774 --> 00:25:56,610 Um, it'll be, uh, six years in April. 432 00:25:56,710 --> 00:25:57,978 Where is he buried? 433 00:25:58,078 --> 00:25:59,312 Uh, my mother had him cremated. 434 00:25:59,412 --> 00:26:01,214 Yeah, the plan was 435 00:26:01,281 --> 00:26:03,416 to spread his ashes at our place in Montauk, 436 00:26:03,516 --> 00:26:06,787 but... never did it. 437 00:26:06,920 --> 00:26:08,388 I don't know why. 438 00:26:08,488 --> 00:26:11,959 So, he's sitting in a jar on our mantle, 439 00:26:12,092 --> 00:26:14,995 which is an odd custom. [chuckles] 440 00:26:15,095 --> 00:26:17,397 Putting ashes in a jar 441 00:26:17,464 --> 00:26:19,667 above a fireplace full of ashes. 442 00:26:19,800 --> 00:26:22,502 What do you miss most 443 00:26:22,602 --> 00:26:24,738 about him? 444 00:26:27,440 --> 00:26:30,778 He used to call me every Monday and, uh, tell me a joke. 445 00:26:30,844 --> 00:26:33,046 -Really? -Mm. 446 00:26:33,847 --> 00:26:35,182 You still remember them? 447 00:26:35,282 --> 00:26:36,583 Oh, yeah. [chuckles] 448 00:26:36,684 --> 00:26:37,617 Tell me one. 449 00:26:37,685 --> 00:26:39,086 -Oh, no, no, no. -Come on. 450 00:26:39,186 --> 00:26:40,420 Uh, they, um... 451 00:26:40,487 --> 00:26:42,089 Yeah, my father had a, uh, 452 00:26:42,155 --> 00:26:44,091 rather warped sense of humor. 453 00:26:44,157 --> 00:26:47,594 Yeah, well, at this point, I'm pretty hard to offend. 454 00:26:49,029 --> 00:26:49,963 Mm. 455 00:26:50,030 --> 00:26:51,999 [chuckles softly] 456 00:26:52,099 --> 00:26:53,466 Okay. [inhales sharply] 457 00:26:53,533 --> 00:26:55,002 Um... 458 00:26:55,936 --> 00:26:57,805 Okay. 459 00:26:57,871 --> 00:27:00,407 So there are four nuns driving in a van. 460 00:27:00,507 --> 00:27:02,776 And the van goes off a cliff, and they all die. 461 00:27:02,876 --> 00:27:04,978 -Funny. -No, no, no, that's... 462 00:27:05,045 --> 00:27:07,180 I'm-I'm getting to the story. This is all just the setup. 463 00:27:07,280 --> 00:27:09,182 -Yeah, I got-I got it, yeah. -Okay. 464 00:27:09,282 --> 00:27:11,151 So they're standing at the pearly gates, 465 00:27:11,218 --> 00:27:14,354 and St. Peter looks them over, and he says to the first nun, 466 00:27:14,454 --> 00:27:16,389 "This is your last chance to confess 467 00:27:16,489 --> 00:27:18,726 before you enter the gates of Heaven, 468 00:27:18,826 --> 00:27:21,294 and your conscience must be cleansed before you enter." 469 00:27:21,394 --> 00:27:24,364 So the first nun thinks about it, and she says, 470 00:27:24,497 --> 00:27:25,966 "Well... 471 00:27:26,033 --> 00:27:29,036 I used to sneak peeks at Father Riley in the shower." 472 00:27:29,136 --> 00:27:30,437 -Mm-hmm. -St. Peter says, 473 00:27:30,537 --> 00:27:31,872 "Well, you're a naughty one, sister. 474 00:27:32,005 --> 00:27:33,841 Wash your eyes in this bowl of holy water 475 00:27:33,941 --> 00:27:35,308 and say five Hail Marys." 476 00:27:35,408 --> 00:27:37,845 She does. Sends her off to Heaven. 477 00:27:37,911 --> 00:27:40,647 So he looks at the second nun, asks her the same thing. 478 00:27:40,714 --> 00:27:42,883 She says, "Well, on occasion, 479 00:27:42,983 --> 00:27:46,419 I would stroke Father Riley's member with my hand." 480 00:27:46,553 --> 00:27:49,289 St. Peter just shakes his head, 481 00:27:49,389 --> 00:27:51,424 tells her to wash her hand in the bowl of holy water, 482 00:27:51,558 --> 00:27:52,893 say ten Hail Marys. 483 00:27:52,993 --> 00:27:55,562 So, she does, lets her into Heaven. 484 00:27:55,662 --> 00:27:57,330 Now the third nun steps up, 485 00:27:57,430 --> 00:28:00,100 but the fourth nun grabs her, throws her to the ground 486 00:28:00,233 --> 00:28:01,735 and steps up to the bowl of holy water. 487 00:28:01,869 --> 00:28:04,872 St. Peter says, "What on earth are you doing, Sister?" 488 00:28:04,938 --> 00:28:07,540 And the nun says, "I'm gonna wash my mouth out in this bowl 489 00:28:07,640 --> 00:28:10,510 before that bitch puts her ass in it." [chuckles] 490 00:28:14,414 --> 00:28:16,383 I stand corrected, Russell. 491 00:28:16,483 --> 00:28:18,018 I can still be offended. 492 00:28:18,085 --> 00:28:20,087 That was very poorly chosen. 493 00:28:20,220 --> 00:28:22,022 I'm sorry. It was the first one that came to my mind. 494 00:28:22,089 --> 00:28:23,991 I am so sorry. I... 495 00:28:24,091 --> 00:28:27,260 -It's terrible. -Common denominator 496 00:28:27,360 --> 00:28:29,129 for their problem seems to be Father Riley. 497 00:28:29,229 --> 00:28:31,999 Yeah, he, uh, did get around. 498 00:28:32,099 --> 00:28:33,967 Ah. What's in it? 499 00:28:34,067 --> 00:28:36,636 Vodka soda, easy on the soda. 500 00:28:37,470 --> 00:28:38,538 God bless you. 501 00:28:38,605 --> 00:28:40,207 I'm meeting Stefan at the gym 502 00:28:40,273 --> 00:28:42,442 at 9:00, if you're up for it. 503 00:28:42,542 --> 00:28:43,877 Oh, yeah. 504 00:28:43,944 --> 00:28:46,313 Exercise is exactly what I need. 505 00:28:49,382 --> 00:28:53,320 I see things didn't end well with the cowboy? 506 00:28:54,154 --> 00:28:56,089 Has that look about it. 507 00:28:57,690 --> 00:28:59,492 Paige has been quiet. 508 00:28:59,592 --> 00:29:01,394 [Stacy] I think this is going to be hardest 509 00:29:01,461 --> 00:29:04,531 on her, I'm afraid. 510 00:29:05,298 --> 00:29:07,500 -How so? -When you've dedicated 511 00:29:07,634 --> 00:29:11,571 your entire life to gaining the attention of one person... 512 00:29:13,006 --> 00:29:15,575 ...what is your purpose when that person is gone? 513 00:29:16,343 --> 00:29:17,978 The girls are handling it well, at least. 514 00:29:18,078 --> 00:29:20,848 Yeah, well, they're too young to know the difference. 515 00:29:20,948 --> 00:29:24,117 Just one less present at Christmas. 516 00:29:27,787 --> 00:29:31,291 I know an excellent therapist, Stacy. 517 00:29:31,391 --> 00:29:32,926 You are my therapist. 518 00:29:34,061 --> 00:29:36,063 You're my best friend. 519 00:29:36,163 --> 00:29:37,965 I'm incapable of being impartial. 520 00:29:38,065 --> 00:29:40,367 Speaking to someone who can look at the situation 521 00:29:40,500 --> 00:29:43,670 with clarity and with zero opinion-- 522 00:29:43,770 --> 00:29:45,172 What I need is opinion. 523 00:29:45,272 --> 00:29:48,075 If I want to know what the book on death says, 524 00:29:48,175 --> 00:29:50,143 I'll buy the fucking book. 525 00:29:52,545 --> 00:29:54,781 * thoughtful music * 526 00:30:14,634 --> 00:30:16,870 [keys jingling] 527 00:30:42,295 --> 00:30:44,531 [speaking indistinctly] 528 00:30:57,544 --> 00:30:59,779 [man speaking indistinctly] 529 00:31:21,935 --> 00:31:24,237 [TV narrator speaking indistinctly] 530 00:31:26,206 --> 00:31:28,441 [remote clatters softly] 531 00:31:46,626 --> 00:31:49,429 [Stacy] I ordered a charcuterie board from Eataly. 532 00:31:49,496 --> 00:31:51,331 And the pizzas from Joe's? 533 00:31:51,431 --> 00:31:53,666 One of us is thinking about your cholesterol. 534 00:31:53,800 --> 00:31:55,535 Pizzas are for Paul. It's the one thing 535 00:31:55,635 --> 00:31:57,937 he misses about this city. 536 00:32:00,373 --> 00:32:01,574 Look at you. 537 00:32:02,342 --> 00:32:05,145 -Look at me, what? -[sighs] Men are such children. 538 00:32:05,278 --> 00:32:07,047 Well, this should be interesting. 539 00:32:07,147 --> 00:32:09,749 You are. You have the same look on your face 540 00:32:09,816 --> 00:32:11,351 pulling out those nasty boots 541 00:32:11,451 --> 00:32:13,453 as an 11-year-old pulling out his baseball cleats. 542 00:32:13,553 --> 00:32:16,323 [chuckles] It's the same look you get when Gucci has a sale. 543 00:32:16,456 --> 00:32:18,958 That's different. That's me saving you money. 544 00:32:19,059 --> 00:32:20,293 [chuckles] You know, 545 00:32:20,393 --> 00:32:22,029 this is proof of the genetic distinction 546 00:32:22,162 --> 00:32:24,264 between men and women. 547 00:32:24,331 --> 00:32:26,366 Tell me, oh, love of my life, 548 00:32:26,499 --> 00:32:29,502 all the ways how when you buy something on sale, 549 00:32:29,602 --> 00:32:31,704 it saves me money. 550 00:32:31,804 --> 00:32:33,406 I'm gonna buy the damn thing no matter what. 551 00:32:33,506 --> 00:32:36,676 Waiting for the sale is how much I love you. 552 00:32:36,809 --> 00:32:38,111 [laughs] 553 00:32:38,211 --> 00:32:40,480 -That almost makes sense. -It makes perfect sense 554 00:32:40,547 --> 00:32:43,616 once you accept the inevitability of the purchase. 555 00:32:43,716 --> 00:32:45,118 [laughs] 556 00:32:46,053 --> 00:32:47,520 Okay. 557 00:32:47,620 --> 00:32:49,522 Why do you do that? 558 00:32:49,622 --> 00:32:51,024 What? 559 00:32:51,124 --> 00:32:53,026 [Stacy] Is your little 560 00:32:53,126 --> 00:32:56,029 mountain mistress the jealous type? 561 00:32:56,896 --> 00:32:58,198 You want to know? 562 00:32:58,298 --> 00:33:01,168 I do want to know. I really want to know. 563 00:33:01,234 --> 00:33:03,736 Because I lost it once. 564 00:33:03,870 --> 00:33:05,338 Fell off in the river. 565 00:33:05,438 --> 00:33:06,773 I spent two days looking for it. 566 00:33:06,873 --> 00:33:08,275 I'm not going through that shit again. 567 00:33:08,375 --> 00:33:10,009 So if I put it right there, 568 00:33:10,110 --> 00:33:12,011 I can't lose it. 569 00:33:12,112 --> 00:33:14,447 Hmm. Panicked, were you? 570 00:33:15,548 --> 00:33:17,417 -Terrified. -Mm. 571 00:33:17,517 --> 00:33:19,152 It's nice to see I still have that effect. 572 00:33:19,219 --> 00:33:22,322 Oh, boy. Do you ever, baby. 573 00:33:27,694 --> 00:33:29,896 * pensive music * 574 00:33:47,747 --> 00:33:49,949 *** 575 00:34:14,173 --> 00:34:16,876 [Stacy] Oh, Madison Avenue. 576 00:34:16,976 --> 00:34:19,479 How did they get the name, do you think? 577 00:34:21,914 --> 00:34:24,284 -I always assumed James Madison. -Oh. 578 00:34:24,383 --> 00:34:25,552 -The president. -Yeah. 579 00:34:25,618 --> 00:34:27,254 Of course. That would make sense. 580 00:34:27,320 --> 00:34:28,821 Yeah. 581 00:34:28,921 --> 00:34:30,189 [sighs] 582 00:34:30,289 --> 00:34:31,724 I suppose they named the Madison River 583 00:34:31,791 --> 00:34:33,459 after him, as well. 584 00:34:34,260 --> 00:34:35,862 Where's the Madison River? 585 00:34:35,961 --> 00:34:37,796 Montana. 586 00:34:39,466 --> 00:34:41,133 Where your husband spent time? 587 00:34:41,968 --> 00:34:43,702 Mm-hmm. 588 00:34:45,972 --> 00:34:48,074 Is that where he died? 589 00:34:48,175 --> 00:34:50,042 No. He died on another river. 590 00:34:50,142 --> 00:34:54,214 Actually, no, he died on a mountain. 591 00:34:55,282 --> 00:34:57,750 No-no river involved at all. 592 00:35:03,723 --> 00:35:06,359 How do you feel when you tell me that? 593 00:35:06,493 --> 00:35:08,027 How do you think I feel? 594 00:35:08,161 --> 00:35:11,498 I don't presume to know. It's why I asked. 595 00:35:11,598 --> 00:35:14,267 Isn't that your job? 596 00:35:14,367 --> 00:35:16,203 To tell me how I feel? 597 00:35:17,270 --> 00:35:19,772 My job is to help you understand how you feel. 598 00:35:19,839 --> 00:35:22,709 -Hmm. -More so, 599 00:35:22,809 --> 00:35:24,744 my job is to help you understand the behaviors 600 00:35:24,844 --> 00:35:26,879 that those feelings elicit. 601 00:35:29,048 --> 00:35:31,218 Hmm. 602 00:35:33,820 --> 00:35:38,090 And how would you describe my present behavior? 603 00:35:38,991 --> 00:35:40,327 Hostile. 604 00:35:40,393 --> 00:35:42,295 [short chuckle] 605 00:35:42,395 --> 00:35:43,663 Hostile? 606 00:35:43,763 --> 00:35:45,232 Mistrusting. 607 00:35:46,165 --> 00:35:48,201 Which I understand. 608 00:35:48,301 --> 00:35:50,237 You don't know me. 609 00:35:51,471 --> 00:35:54,040 And yet, here you are, in theory, 610 00:35:54,140 --> 00:35:56,609 willing to expose 611 00:35:56,709 --> 00:35:58,745 your most personal thoughts 612 00:35:58,845 --> 00:36:00,713 and intimate feelings. 613 00:36:01,548 --> 00:36:04,251 Trust me in my interpretation 614 00:36:04,384 --> 00:36:07,554 of those feelings and behaviors... 615 00:36:09,055 --> 00:36:11,258 ...to guide your decision-making in the future. 616 00:36:11,391 --> 00:36:13,226 My decision-making? What... 617 00:36:13,360 --> 00:36:15,262 what-what decisions are we questioning? 618 00:36:15,362 --> 00:36:17,196 -I'm not questioning any. -No, you are the one 619 00:36:17,297 --> 00:36:19,266 who said it. My husband died. 620 00:36:19,399 --> 00:36:21,901 The love of my life, 621 00:36:22,001 --> 00:36:24,237 the father of my children, 622 00:36:24,337 --> 00:36:27,740 my center, my soul is gone. 623 00:36:29,141 --> 00:36:31,043 If you, by chance, have 624 00:36:31,143 --> 00:36:33,413 happened upon any information 625 00:36:33,513 --> 00:36:36,849 that might assist me in mitigating the desire 626 00:36:36,949 --> 00:36:40,186 to claw my eyes out with a fucking spoon 627 00:36:40,287 --> 00:36:41,688 to get rid of the pain, 628 00:36:41,754 --> 00:36:45,325 I sure would appreciate that. 629 00:36:46,158 --> 00:36:48,227 But I do not need you staring at me 630 00:36:48,328 --> 00:36:50,062 like I'm some bored housewife 631 00:36:50,162 --> 00:36:53,966 trying to justify her affair with her fucking tennis coach. 632 00:36:54,066 --> 00:36:56,436 I know those women, plenty of them. 633 00:36:56,536 --> 00:36:59,639 I am not one of them. 634 00:36:59,772 --> 00:37:01,908 I... 635 00:37:02,008 --> 00:37:03,643 am hurting. 636 00:37:03,743 --> 00:37:07,380 And I would like some help with that. 637 00:37:07,480 --> 00:37:09,215 If you can. 638 00:37:09,316 --> 00:37:11,484 If you can't... 639 00:37:13,185 --> 00:37:14,854 ...then I'll leave early. 640 00:37:15,955 --> 00:37:18,825 And you can keep the fucking change. 641 00:37:24,831 --> 00:37:26,466 You care for a drink? 642 00:37:29,302 --> 00:37:31,103 I would love one. 643 00:37:37,744 --> 00:37:39,912 Don't normally do this. 644 00:37:40,680 --> 00:37:44,517 Spend most of my time convincing my clients not to self-medicate. 645 00:37:46,419 --> 00:37:47,654 Don't mind whiskey? 646 00:37:47,754 --> 00:37:50,790 I don't give a shit what it is. 647 00:38:10,810 --> 00:38:12,979 What you need is this. 648 00:38:13,045 --> 00:38:15,348 A lot of this. 649 00:38:15,482 --> 00:38:16,783 Not this. 650 00:38:16,883 --> 00:38:19,018 A lot of talking. 651 00:38:19,919 --> 00:38:21,354 And yelling and crying. 652 00:38:21,454 --> 00:38:24,391 A lot of it, and often. 653 00:38:25,224 --> 00:38:26,926 And in time... 654 00:38:28,561 --> 00:38:30,830 ...those memories will become fond again. 655 00:38:31,764 --> 00:38:34,166 They won't hurt to recall them. 656 00:38:35,167 --> 00:38:37,203 And you'll... 657 00:38:37,336 --> 00:38:38,805 laugh. 658 00:38:40,873 --> 00:38:43,309 Will you love again? 659 00:38:43,410 --> 00:38:45,044 Maybe. 660 00:38:45,144 --> 00:38:48,014 I don't have any idea if that's something you want. 661 00:38:50,483 --> 00:38:52,051 Will you ever be whole again? 662 00:38:52,184 --> 00:38:55,555 Will you feel like you did before he died? 663 00:38:58,591 --> 00:38:59,992 No. 664 00:39:00,893 --> 00:39:02,562 But you know that. 665 00:39:03,362 --> 00:39:06,899 But you will heal if you let yourself. 666 00:39:07,033 --> 00:39:10,102 You will have as much life to live 667 00:39:10,236 --> 00:39:12,505 as you allow yourself. 668 00:39:16,075 --> 00:39:18,277 Or you'll have none. 669 00:39:20,379 --> 00:39:22,014 You'll have no life. 670 00:39:26,018 --> 00:39:28,254 Does that make sense? 671 00:39:30,389 --> 00:39:31,924 Yeah. 672 00:39:32,792 --> 00:39:34,427 Okay. 673 00:39:38,531 --> 00:39:40,967 Why don't you finish your drink and let me have it? 674 00:39:41,067 --> 00:39:42,569 Seriously. 675 00:39:42,669 --> 00:39:44,971 Come on. Give it your best shot. 676 00:39:50,376 --> 00:39:53,245 You're a terrible therapist, you know that? 677 00:39:53,312 --> 00:39:56,215 Yeah. With that smug fucking sweater. 678 00:39:56,315 --> 00:39:58,084 [chuckles softly] 679 00:39:58,184 --> 00:39:59,786 You really like saying "fuck," don't you? 680 00:39:59,886 --> 00:40:02,021 I know. 681 00:40:02,121 --> 00:40:04,190 I find it quite... 682 00:40:05,725 --> 00:40:07,460 ...liberating, at the moment. 683 00:40:07,560 --> 00:40:09,095 Good. 684 00:40:09,161 --> 00:40:10,396 -Say it again. -[laughs] 685 00:40:10,463 --> 00:40:11,898 Fuck you. 686 00:40:11,998 --> 00:40:15,301 Are we gonna do trust falls next, you fucking quack? 687 00:40:15,434 --> 00:40:17,336 [laughs] 688 00:40:17,470 --> 00:40:19,238 It's a really good place to start. Come on. 689 00:40:19,305 --> 00:40:21,240 Keep it coming. Let's go. 690 00:40:21,340 --> 00:40:22,642 -Mm? -I'm serious. 691 00:40:22,775 --> 00:40:24,977 [Stacy laughs] 692 00:40:27,046 --> 00:40:29,181 I'm thinking about it. 693 00:40:29,315 --> 00:40:31,651 I'm considering it. 694 00:40:31,751 --> 00:40:33,419 I know, I know, I know. 695 00:40:33,486 --> 00:40:34,821 I'm running away, 696 00:40:34,921 --> 00:40:36,689 running away from my problems. 697 00:40:36,823 --> 00:40:38,925 But this problem goes with me, so 698 00:40:38,991 --> 00:40:41,528 I'm not running from anything. 699 00:40:43,429 --> 00:40:45,498 Would I miss my daughters? Uh... 700 00:40:45,632 --> 00:40:48,835 Honestly, I don't... I don't know. 701 00:40:48,968 --> 00:40:51,871 And part of me thinks it would be better for them. 702 00:40:52,004 --> 00:40:54,006 You know, live their own lives. 703 00:40:54,841 --> 00:40:56,843 Maybe they could move with you. 704 00:40:56,976 --> 00:40:58,611 I mean, it doesn't sound like either of them are bound 705 00:40:58,678 --> 00:41:01,213 -to the city. -That's what I said. 706 00:41:01,313 --> 00:41:03,015 My oldest daughter needs it. 707 00:41:03,115 --> 00:41:04,350 I... 708 00:41:05,117 --> 00:41:07,820 ...actually threatened to cut her off if she didn't. 709 00:41:07,920 --> 00:41:09,789 That's not very nice. 710 00:41:09,889 --> 00:41:13,059 Oh, what, do they teach sarcasm 711 00:41:13,159 --> 00:41:15,227 in therapy school these days? 712 00:41:16,028 --> 00:41:18,565 Well, if by "therapy school" you mean Dartmouth, 713 00:41:18,665 --> 00:41:21,701 then, yeah, they kind of invented it there. 714 00:41:26,205 --> 00:41:27,907 You think I should? 715 00:41:30,309 --> 00:41:32,879 Not my place to say, but... 716 00:41:34,647 --> 00:41:37,083 ...I think you should consider it, 717 00:41:37,216 --> 00:41:38,718 and I'll tell you why. 718 00:41:38,851 --> 00:41:41,320 Because you are actively weighing your future 719 00:41:41,420 --> 00:41:44,123 and the consequences of your choices in that future, 720 00:41:44,223 --> 00:41:45,725 and that's healthy. That's good for your soul. 721 00:41:45,825 --> 00:41:48,828 So whether you actually do it is irrelevant. 722 00:41:48,895 --> 00:41:51,698 But you should seriously consider it. 723 00:41:51,798 --> 00:41:53,900 You should consider 724 00:41:54,000 --> 00:41:55,668 moving to Europe, 725 00:41:55,768 --> 00:41:57,169 spend a year traveling. 726 00:41:57,269 --> 00:41:58,805 You've got the financial means, 727 00:41:58,905 --> 00:42:00,907 no responsibilities here preventing it. 728 00:42:01,007 --> 00:42:04,210 You should consider everything. 729 00:42:06,112 --> 00:42:08,247 Wish I could have met him. 730 00:42:08,347 --> 00:42:10,249 Must have been a hell of a man. 731 00:42:10,349 --> 00:42:11,884 Because you are a hell of a woman. 732 00:42:11,951 --> 00:42:14,386 You know who you are and you're not ashamed of it. 733 00:42:14,453 --> 00:42:17,724 And this-- the yelling, and crying and pondering-- 734 00:42:17,824 --> 00:42:20,392 this is what you're supposed to be doing. 735 00:42:20,459 --> 00:42:22,228 This is grieving. 736 00:42:22,328 --> 00:42:25,364 This is accepting an immeasurable loss in your life 737 00:42:25,464 --> 00:42:28,434 and racking your brain to try to find a way to survive it. 738 00:42:29,702 --> 00:42:31,303 And you will. 739 00:42:32,605 --> 00:42:34,874 [sighs] 740 00:42:34,974 --> 00:42:37,143 Thank you, Phil. 741 00:42:37,944 --> 00:42:39,812 Wow. This has been... 742 00:42:41,280 --> 00:42:42,949 ...pleasantly cathartic. 743 00:42:43,049 --> 00:42:44,951 [sniffles] I took one look at that sweater, 744 00:42:45,051 --> 00:42:48,387 and I had very little faith in you, but you-- 745 00:42:48,487 --> 00:42:49,822 you overcame it. 746 00:42:49,922 --> 00:42:53,392 Turns out you don't suck at your job. 747 00:42:53,492 --> 00:42:56,763 Well, that is wildly offensive. 748 00:42:56,863 --> 00:42:58,164 Thank you. 749 00:42:58,264 --> 00:43:00,132 Same time tomorrow? 750 00:43:00,232 --> 00:43:02,168 I'm thinking afternoon. 751 00:43:02,301 --> 00:43:04,570 I still got five clients, and I'm pretty drunk. 752 00:43:04,671 --> 00:43:08,274 I think you are a client to end the day with, not begin one. 753 00:43:08,340 --> 00:43:10,777 Fine. See you at happy hour. 754 00:43:10,843 --> 00:43:13,412 * serene music * 755 00:43:15,614 --> 00:43:17,817 [keys clatter] 756 00:43:20,853 --> 00:43:22,855 [indistinct chatter on TV] 757 00:43:27,694 --> 00:43:29,328 [weatherwoman] Across the northern plains and into 758 00:43:29,461 --> 00:43:32,832 the upper Midwest, a colder air mass is settling in. 759 00:43:32,932 --> 00:43:35,634 [overlapping, indistinct chatter continues on TVs] 760 00:43:40,840 --> 00:43:42,174 Who's your realtor? 761 00:43:42,274 --> 00:43:45,344 Yeah. No matter what I do, I can't stay here. 762 00:43:45,444 --> 00:43:48,180 Lili, I can smell him. 763 00:43:48,280 --> 00:43:50,116 Hold on, hold on. 764 00:43:52,184 --> 00:43:53,552 Is everything okay? 765 00:43:53,686 --> 00:43:56,889 -So, um, Paige is-is-is in bed, -[Paige crying] 766 00:43:57,023 --> 00:43:58,357 and she won't talk, 767 00:43:58,457 --> 00:44:00,727 and she can't stop crying, and she's... 768 00:44:00,827 --> 00:44:02,528 Well, she's hyperventilating, and I feel like 769 00:44:02,661 --> 00:44:04,330 I should call an ambulance, but I don't... 770 00:44:04,396 --> 00:44:06,132 Like, I feel like that might make her worse. 771 00:44:06,232 --> 00:44:07,700 No, you're right, you're right. It would. 772 00:44:07,800 --> 00:44:09,135 I'll be there in 15 minutes. 773 00:44:09,201 --> 00:44:12,038 -Call Abby. -Okay, okay. Calling her now. 774 00:44:31,590 --> 00:44:33,225 -[door buzzes] -[lock clicks] 775 00:44:34,894 --> 00:44:35,895 [doorbell rings] 776 00:44:35,995 --> 00:44:37,496 [Paige crying] 777 00:44:37,563 --> 00:44:38,831 [sighs] 778 00:44:38,931 --> 00:44:40,800 -Is she in the bedroom? -Yeah. 779 00:44:40,900 --> 00:44:43,202 [sighs] 780 00:44:44,570 --> 00:44:46,272 Uh... 781 00:44:46,405 --> 00:44:47,740 do you have any sweets? 782 00:44:47,840 --> 00:44:50,709 -Sweets? -Okay, get some ice cream-- 783 00:44:50,777 --> 00:44:53,579 rocky road-- and buy some chocolate chips. 784 00:44:53,712 --> 00:44:55,714 Put three scoops in a glass of milk, 785 00:44:55,782 --> 00:44:57,149 put the chocolate chips on top, 786 00:44:57,249 --> 00:44:59,318 and-and then just bring it to me with a spoon. 787 00:44:59,418 --> 00:45:01,253 That sounds, uh, disgusting, to start. 788 00:45:01,387 --> 00:45:03,422 I wasn't asking your opinion of it, Russell. 789 00:45:03,522 --> 00:45:05,724 [doorbell ringing] 790 00:45:09,929 --> 00:45:11,263 I got rocky road. 791 00:45:11,363 --> 00:45:13,032 Desperate times call for desperate measures. 792 00:45:13,132 --> 00:45:16,168 -Grabbed the chocolate chips? -The shitty ones like she likes. 793 00:45:16,268 --> 00:45:17,303 Well, looks like all we need 794 00:45:17,403 --> 00:45:18,771 from you is a cup, Russell. 795 00:45:18,905 --> 00:45:20,106 Give it to her. 796 00:45:20,239 --> 00:45:22,508 -She knows how to make it. -Got it. Okay. 797 00:45:23,742 --> 00:45:25,778 -[crying] -Hey, hey, hey, hey, hey. 798 00:45:25,878 --> 00:45:28,114 -Hey, it's okay. It's okay. -I... I'm sorry. 799 00:45:28,214 --> 00:45:30,950 It's okay. It's okay. It's okay. You know what this is? 800 00:45:31,050 --> 00:45:32,251 Wha-What? 801 00:45:32,351 --> 00:45:34,020 This is how much you loved him. 802 00:45:34,120 --> 00:45:37,056 And your body just doesn't know where to put all that love now. 803 00:45:37,156 --> 00:45:38,791 Okay? But you don't have to put it anywhere. 804 00:45:38,891 --> 00:45:41,127 And you don't have to stop loving someone 805 00:45:41,227 --> 00:45:42,428 when they're gone, honey. 806 00:45:42,494 --> 00:45:44,430 In fact, one could argue 807 00:45:44,530 --> 00:45:46,398 that you should love them more. 808 00:45:46,465 --> 00:45:49,568 And here's a sad fact of life. 809 00:45:51,470 --> 00:45:52,939 You will feel this way again. 810 00:45:53,005 --> 00:45:55,141 -No. -Yeah, when I die. 811 00:45:55,241 --> 00:45:57,810 When your husband dies and your friends. 812 00:45:57,944 --> 00:45:59,478 And-and someday, 813 00:45:59,611 --> 00:46:02,348 your children will feel this way about you. 814 00:46:03,115 --> 00:46:05,818 Thanks, Mom. I feel so much better. 815 00:46:05,918 --> 00:46:07,653 [Abigail] I come bearing gifts. 816 00:46:07,753 --> 00:46:09,355 [Paige] I'm not hungry. 817 00:46:09,488 --> 00:46:12,024 It's not food. It is a drug. 818 00:46:12,158 --> 00:46:15,194 It is sugar and chocolate in a mixture 819 00:46:15,294 --> 00:46:16,662 that only your metabolism can process in a way 820 00:46:16,795 --> 00:46:18,464 that doesn't end up on your hips. 821 00:46:18,530 --> 00:46:20,499 And I hate you for it. 822 00:46:23,169 --> 00:46:25,371 I used to eat this when I was, like, five. 823 00:46:25,504 --> 00:46:28,074 Well, you still act five, so... 824 00:46:28,941 --> 00:46:30,576 Mmm. 825 00:46:31,443 --> 00:46:32,778 Fuck you and your bad roots. 826 00:46:32,879 --> 00:46:34,546 Now she's back. 827 00:46:34,680 --> 00:46:37,083 I don't understand it. 828 00:46:37,183 --> 00:46:39,818 It's the crunch with the cold 829 00:46:39,919 --> 00:46:41,453 and the mushy of the ice cream. 830 00:46:41,520 --> 00:46:42,821 Right. 831 00:46:42,922 --> 00:46:45,691 The explanation doesn't sell it, Paige. 832 00:46:45,791 --> 00:46:46,792 Well... 833 00:46:46,893 --> 00:46:48,227 You got her? 834 00:46:49,061 --> 00:46:50,496 I got her, but I cannot stay the night. 835 00:46:50,562 --> 00:46:51,998 [Stacy] I can stay the night. 836 00:46:52,098 --> 00:46:53,933 [shaky breaths, sniffles] 837 00:46:55,501 --> 00:46:57,669 [sniffles] 838 00:46:59,906 --> 00:47:01,407 Mmm. 839 00:47:02,341 --> 00:47:05,111 -This is my favorite thing ever. -I know. 840 00:47:13,886 --> 00:47:16,555 [sighs] 841 00:47:16,655 --> 00:47:18,624 She okay? 842 00:47:20,226 --> 00:47:21,894 Yeah, she will be. 843 00:47:22,794 --> 00:47:24,296 Mm. 844 00:47:24,396 --> 00:47:27,266 Is there a decent bar near here? 845 00:47:27,399 --> 00:47:29,301 Um, there's a... 846 00:47:29,401 --> 00:47:31,938 there's a dive bar around the corner. 847 00:47:32,038 --> 00:47:35,908 Well, SoHo's version of a dive bar. 848 00:47:37,309 --> 00:47:39,078 Hmm. 849 00:47:45,084 --> 00:47:47,319 [indistinct chatter] 850 00:47:50,622 --> 00:47:53,192 Hmm. What's this place called? 851 00:47:53,259 --> 00:47:55,127 Um, I don't know. 852 00:47:55,261 --> 00:47:57,496 I'm-I'm not sure it has a name. 853 00:47:58,931 --> 00:48:01,133 [mutters] 854 00:48:02,734 --> 00:48:04,503 [Stacy] Hmm. 855 00:48:08,874 --> 00:48:10,576 Hi. 856 00:48:10,676 --> 00:48:12,411 What's the name of this place? 857 00:48:12,511 --> 00:48:15,247 Name? Uh, people just call it the bar. 858 00:48:15,347 --> 00:48:17,616 Or the bar down the street. Something like that. 859 00:48:17,716 --> 00:48:19,986 -No name? -Not that I'm aware of, no. 860 00:48:20,086 --> 00:48:21,720 What does your paycheck say? 861 00:48:21,820 --> 00:48:24,290 Uh, XT Enterprises LLC 862 00:48:24,390 --> 00:48:26,125 or some shit. 863 00:48:26,225 --> 00:48:28,094 [short chuckle] 864 00:48:28,194 --> 00:48:30,062 Okay, so... 865 00:48:30,129 --> 00:48:32,831 Bar just doesn't have a name. 866 00:48:32,931 --> 00:48:34,600 No name. What can I get you? 867 00:48:34,700 --> 00:48:36,135 Oh, God. I'm, uh... 868 00:48:36,268 --> 00:48:38,704 I am not in the mood to make any decisions. 869 00:48:38,804 --> 00:48:40,606 Mm-hmm. Martini? 870 00:48:40,672 --> 00:48:42,508 Oh, that is a cocktail, 871 00:48:42,641 --> 00:48:45,277 and this is the furthest place from a cocktail bar, so... 872 00:48:45,344 --> 00:48:48,347 True that. Uh, how about a Irish car bomb? 873 00:48:48,447 --> 00:48:50,382 I have no idea what that is. 874 00:48:50,482 --> 00:48:52,251 -Trust me. -[Stacy] Okay. 875 00:48:52,318 --> 00:48:53,519 What about you? 876 00:48:53,652 --> 00:48:54,853 What kind of amber ales do you have? 877 00:48:54,953 --> 00:48:56,555 That'll be two Irish car bombs. 878 00:48:56,655 --> 00:48:58,857 Hey, I like your style. Two Irish car bombs. 879 00:48:58,991 --> 00:49:00,259 I have to work in the morning. 880 00:49:00,359 --> 00:49:02,561 It's one drink, Russell. 881 00:49:07,333 --> 00:49:09,201 Ooh, I didn't see that coming. 882 00:49:09,335 --> 00:49:12,671 -Um... -Oh, gosh. Apologies, Russell. 883 00:49:13,505 --> 00:49:16,508 This is gonna hurt. 884 00:49:17,309 --> 00:49:19,145 Uh, y-- 885 00:49:19,211 --> 00:49:21,580 Great. [clears throat] 886 00:49:21,680 --> 00:49:23,982 -You got to... Yeah. -[Stacy] Yeah. 887 00:49:31,357 --> 00:49:33,992 -[Stacy laughing] -It went down the wrong pipe. 888 00:49:34,093 --> 00:49:35,827 -[coughs] -[laughs] 889 00:49:35,927 --> 00:49:37,896 I have a bad gag reflex. 890 00:49:38,030 --> 00:49:39,231 -[coughs] -No, no. I'm not... 891 00:49:39,331 --> 00:49:41,300 I'm-I'm not laughing at that. 892 00:49:41,400 --> 00:49:43,869 What, then? 893 00:49:43,969 --> 00:49:46,538 Oh, life. 894 00:49:47,373 --> 00:49:48,907 And the choices people make. 895 00:49:49,041 --> 00:49:50,609 Don't get me wrong. 896 00:49:50,709 --> 00:49:52,744 She made a good one with you. 897 00:49:54,980 --> 00:49:56,582 What are your dreams? 898 00:49:58,884 --> 00:50:00,686 -Dreams? -Or... 899 00:50:00,786 --> 00:50:04,556 you know, "aspirations" might be a better word. 900 00:50:04,656 --> 00:50:06,225 For your life. 901 00:50:06,358 --> 00:50:08,094 For my daughter. 902 00:50:08,227 --> 00:50:09,661 I mean, what-- Uh, you know, 903 00:50:09,761 --> 00:50:11,063 we-we just got the town house, so we-- 904 00:50:11,197 --> 00:50:14,700 Yeah, well, that's a purchase, not a dream. 905 00:50:14,800 --> 00:50:18,070 -[weak chuckle] -Have you two 906 00:50:18,170 --> 00:50:21,407 -talked about starting a family? -Uh, 907 00:50:21,540 --> 00:50:22,741 you know Paige. 908 00:50:22,874 --> 00:50:24,176 She just got down to a size zero, 909 00:50:24,276 --> 00:50:25,677 and she worked really hard for it, so-- 910 00:50:25,744 --> 00:50:27,546 Okay, Russell, Russell, independent thoughts. 911 00:50:27,646 --> 00:50:29,615 Do you have any? 912 00:50:31,450 --> 00:50:34,052 Yeah, I mean, I guess I want-I want to have kids. 913 00:50:34,153 --> 00:50:35,921 -Mm-hmm. Okay. -And I want to raise them, 914 00:50:36,054 --> 00:50:37,423 and I want to... 915 00:50:37,556 --> 00:50:39,125 I want to move out of town, 916 00:50:39,258 --> 00:50:40,959 you know, where they can have a normal-- 917 00:50:41,059 --> 00:50:42,594 You know, tr-- you know, trick-or-treat 918 00:50:42,694 --> 00:50:45,197 and-and play baseball 919 00:50:45,264 --> 00:50:46,965 and run out on the street, you know? 920 00:50:47,099 --> 00:50:48,434 Mm. No, I don't know. 921 00:50:48,534 --> 00:50:50,669 No, I don't know. I raised mine here. 922 00:50:50,769 --> 00:50:52,037 Right. 923 00:50:52,104 --> 00:50:54,806 Well, that would be my dream. [clears throat] 924 00:50:54,906 --> 00:50:57,143 What about when they're grown? 925 00:50:58,544 --> 00:50:59,878 -What's the dream then? -[laughs] 926 00:50:59,945 --> 00:51:01,780 I don't know. I don't know. 927 00:51:01,880 --> 00:51:03,081 I-I haven't gotten that far. 928 00:51:03,182 --> 00:51:05,517 Yeah, well, then you need a new dream. 929 00:51:07,919 --> 00:51:11,190 Honestly, I always thought of you and Preston as the dream. 930 00:51:14,926 --> 00:51:16,762 So did I, Russell. 931 00:51:16,862 --> 00:51:19,131 * thoughtful music * 932 00:51:20,566 --> 00:51:22,834 But that dream is over. 933 00:51:23,969 --> 00:51:25,971 Then I guess we both need a new one. 934 00:51:26,071 --> 00:51:28,274 [chuckles softly] 935 00:51:29,141 --> 00:51:30,809 Yeah. 936 00:51:49,094 --> 00:51:51,230 ***