1 00:00:55,125 --> 00:00:56,333 I did it! 2 00:00:56,833 --> 00:00:58,208 Holy shit! 3 00:00:58,291 --> 00:00:59,708 It… 4 00:00:59,791 --> 00:01:01,166 was… 5 00:01:01,250 --> 00:01:02,500 awesome. 6 00:01:02,583 --> 00:01:03,583 Start from the top! 7 00:01:03,666 --> 00:01:06,083 I walked into school this morning. 8 00:01:08,125 --> 00:01:10,166 And then I see Colin Corwin. 9 00:01:10,250 --> 00:01:13,791 -Yeah! -Somebody said you got a new friend 10 00:01:18,583 --> 00:01:22,583 Does she love you better than I can? 11 00:01:25,416 --> 00:01:27,416 Jill tastes like beef jerky. 12 00:01:34,833 --> 00:01:38,166 I see you told everyone how you begged me to suck face. 13 00:01:38,250 --> 00:01:40,208 -Classy! -Ooh! 14 00:01:40,291 --> 00:01:43,458 Sorry, Jill, but I'm not gonna be your boyfriend. 15 00:01:43,541 --> 00:01:46,416 -Oh! -Don't flatter yourself, Colin Corwin. 16 00:01:46,500 --> 00:01:50,041 I regretted you the second your sweaty slug lips touched mine. 17 00:01:51,125 --> 00:01:54,541 Hey, Jill, does your sister taste like beef jerky too, 18 00:01:54,625 --> 00:01:56,416 or just… cancer? 19 00:01:56,500 --> 00:01:57,875 Cold. 20 00:01:57,958 --> 00:02:00,625 I'm just gonna dance all night… 21 00:02:01,583 --> 00:02:03,416 Fight! 22 00:02:03,500 --> 00:02:07,750 Fight! Fight! Fight! 23 00:02:10,666 --> 00:02:13,166 You're gonna be in so much trouble. 24 00:02:13,250 --> 00:02:14,333 Mr. Corwin! 25 00:02:15,500 --> 00:02:17,666 You cry like a little bitch. 26 00:02:19,000 --> 00:02:21,833 He asked if I tasted like cancer? 27 00:02:21,916 --> 00:02:22,875 That's it? 28 00:02:22,958 --> 00:02:25,750 I'd rather have cancer than cystic fibrosis. 29 00:02:25,833 --> 00:02:28,625 Boys are just so embarrassing. 30 00:02:28,708 --> 00:02:30,750 Well, congratulations. You're suspended. 31 00:02:30,833 --> 00:02:31,791 Again. 32 00:02:34,833 --> 00:02:38,458 Welcome to the culinary motherland, San Francisco. 33 00:02:39,333 --> 00:02:43,041 I just gotta see it for myself 34 00:02:43,541 --> 00:02:47,375 I'm in the corner Watching you kiss her 35 00:02:47,458 --> 00:02:50,291 Oh 36 00:02:51,333 --> 00:02:52,208 Turmeric. 37 00:02:53,333 --> 00:02:55,458 Pistachio, fruit of the gods! 38 00:02:55,541 --> 00:02:58,541 Oh! 39 00:02:59,958 --> 00:03:01,958 I'm giving it my all-- 40 00:03:03,791 --> 00:03:05,833 Back away, girls! Out of the way! 41 00:03:12,750 --> 00:03:14,375 We shoulda had boys. 42 00:03:14,958 --> 00:03:19,625 You see, the antibiotics aren't working as well as we'd hoped. 43 00:03:19,708 --> 00:03:20,583 Hi. 44 00:03:20,666 --> 00:03:22,916 Izzy, listen. It's Robyn. 45 00:03:25,541 --> 00:03:28,083 On my own… 46 00:03:28,166 --> 00:03:29,875 -Ready? -Ready! 47 00:03:29,958 --> 00:03:32,000 On my own 48 00:03:48,041 --> 00:03:52,625 So far away, but still so near… 49 00:03:52,708 --> 00:03:55,791 Do you really need to go out? It's your last New Year's with us. 50 00:03:55,875 --> 00:03:57,166 I know. 51 00:03:57,250 --> 00:03:59,583 It's also my last New Year's with my friends. 52 00:03:59,666 --> 00:04:00,833 -I know. -Bye, love you! 53 00:04:00,916 --> 00:04:01,750 -Be safe. -Mwah! Bye! 54 00:04:01,833 --> 00:04:04,333 -Love you. -To say goodbye 55 00:04:04,958 --> 00:04:06,333 You ready? 56 00:04:06,833 --> 00:04:10,958 15 minutes to midnight, bitches! 57 00:04:11,041 --> 00:04:14,083 I'm sorry. I have gotta go. I can't… 58 00:04:23,041 --> 00:04:25,500 -I'm so sorry. -No. 59 00:04:25,583 --> 00:04:27,291 That was so fun. 60 00:04:29,416 --> 00:04:31,916 -Sorry. Pardon me. Excuse me. -I'm giving it my all 61 00:04:32,000 --> 00:04:36,416 But I'm not the girl You're taking home… 62 00:04:36,500 --> 00:04:39,125 Three, two, one! 63 00:04:39,208 --> 00:04:42,166 Happy New Year! 64 00:04:50,708 --> 00:04:53,916 I have my knife skills test tomorrow, and there's just no way for me 65 00:04:54,000 --> 00:04:57,000 to make it in time and I am so, so sorry. 66 00:04:57,083 --> 00:04:58,041 Holy sh… 67 00:04:58,125 --> 00:05:00,166 Don't worry, my lad. 68 00:05:00,250 --> 00:05:03,625 Pretty soon, you'll be headed to the culinary motherland! 69 00:05:03,708 --> 00:05:05,583 Dancing on my own… 70 00:05:05,666 --> 00:05:09,541 He thought it was gonna happen in 2029, 30 years ago, 71 00:05:09,625 --> 00:05:11,916 so if we can just… 72 00:05:13,208 --> 00:05:15,291 Oh, you're looking at my eye. 73 00:05:15,375 --> 00:05:18,458 -Your eye? What? -Yeah. I look like Sloth from The Goonies. 74 00:05:19,541 --> 00:05:20,916 -No, you don't. -I know. 75 00:05:21,000 --> 00:05:23,041 -No, you don't. -Don't worry. It's… 76 00:05:23,125 --> 00:05:24,291 It's just pink eye. 77 00:05:25,625 --> 00:05:28,791 Well, I'm pretty sure pink eye is, like, super contagious. 78 00:05:28,875 --> 00:05:32,041 No, that's just a common misconception. 79 00:05:32,125 --> 00:05:33,833 No, really, I think it is. 80 00:05:33,916 --> 00:05:35,666 Fake news made up by Big Pharma. 81 00:05:37,250 --> 00:05:38,416 Trust me. 82 00:05:38,500 --> 00:05:41,208 Your eyes, on the other hand, are super beautiful. 83 00:05:44,250 --> 00:05:47,541 Your call has been forwarded to voicemail. 84 00:05:47,625 --> 00:05:51,250 And then he smears butt particles all over my face. 85 00:05:51,333 --> 00:05:54,666 My face is a butthole. 86 00:05:54,750 --> 00:05:58,166 Call me tomorrow, please. 87 00:06:09,041 --> 00:06:09,875 I'm up. 88 00:06:18,333 --> 00:06:23,916 I'm just young enough To be a little numb and dumb 89 00:06:27,583 --> 00:06:33,208 Not sure how I feel But I'm sure I've seen enough 90 00:06:36,750 --> 00:06:40,500 Enough that the world Would miss me a little 91 00:06:40,583 --> 00:06:41,916 Would they say I-- 92 00:06:49,041 --> 00:06:51,166 Here we are, here we are 93 00:06:51,250 --> 00:06:53,708 Here we are, here we are 94 00:06:53,791 --> 00:06:56,041 Hey 95 00:06:56,125 --> 00:06:58,375 Hey 96 00:06:58,458 --> 00:07:00,666 Here we are, here we are 97 00:07:00,750 --> 00:07:04,250 It's like I'm almost happy 98 00:07:05,291 --> 00:07:09,125 It's like I'm almost happy 99 00:07:45,458 --> 00:07:46,541 Bonjour! 100 00:07:46,625 --> 00:07:49,166 Chef Bastien, who is your favorite chef? 101 00:07:49,250 --> 00:07:51,833 Who is my favorite chef? That is easy. 102 00:07:51,916 --> 00:07:53,500 It is ma mère. 103 00:07:53,583 --> 00:07:56,083 She is so beautiful, she is dead. 104 00:07:56,166 --> 00:07:59,166 Your performance on Top Chef changed my life. 105 00:08:01,416 --> 00:08:02,250 Ow. 106 00:08:05,541 --> 00:08:08,208 Geoffrey! Eyes on your cake! 107 00:08:08,958 --> 00:08:10,666 Get! 108 00:08:11,625 --> 00:08:13,458 Look at me. Don't look at me. 109 00:08:14,791 --> 00:08:15,875 Look at me. 110 00:08:16,750 --> 00:08:18,291 Never look at me! 111 00:08:24,000 --> 00:08:26,916 Did you just look at me? Did you just make eye contact with me? 112 00:08:27,000 --> 00:08:28,500 No, Chef. 113 00:08:36,791 --> 00:08:38,125 Oh! 114 00:08:38,208 --> 00:08:40,541 Maybe try saying "corner" next time. 115 00:08:51,083 --> 00:08:52,125 -You okay? -Yeah. 116 00:08:52,208 --> 00:08:57,041 Eight hours deseeding and slicing kumquats?! 117 00:08:57,125 --> 00:08:58,208 Culinary waterboarding. 118 00:08:58,291 --> 00:09:01,541 I can't even remember the last time I actually made anything, 119 00:09:01,625 --> 00:09:03,750 other than my brekkie burrito. 120 00:09:03,833 --> 00:09:08,791 All I do is measure, deseed, slice, and pray for the sweet release of death. 121 00:09:08,875 --> 00:09:11,708 An AI robot could do my job better than me. 122 00:09:11,791 --> 00:09:14,041 You were built for this, my dude. 123 00:09:14,125 --> 00:09:15,291 Let a mofo know. 124 00:09:16,750 --> 00:09:19,625 I will let a mofo know I am homesick, 125 00:09:19,708 --> 00:09:22,916 I'm almost out of savings, and there's nowhere for me to go 126 00:09:23,000 --> 00:09:25,833 unless a baker quits or retires or dies. 127 00:09:25,916 --> 00:09:27,833 All right, fine, you crazy son of a bitch. 128 00:09:27,916 --> 00:09:30,458 I will fly to San Fran and murder one of the bakers with you. 129 00:09:30,541 --> 00:09:31,833 How would we do it? 130 00:09:31,916 --> 00:09:34,833 Well, obviously, we'd wrap my oxygen cord around his neck. 131 00:09:34,916 --> 00:09:38,416 Wow, you answered that so quickly. 132 00:09:38,500 --> 00:09:41,750 Wait, speaking of lack of oxygen to the brain, 133 00:09:41,833 --> 00:09:43,916 I'm getting drinks with Equinox Ethan tomorrow. 134 00:09:44,000 --> 00:09:47,041 Isn't that the guy who thinks that babies can breathe underwater? 135 00:09:47,125 --> 00:09:48,083 He's neurospicy. 136 00:09:48,166 --> 00:09:50,458 Have a little healthy self-love, my guy. 137 00:09:50,541 --> 00:09:51,541 Eh… 138 00:09:52,333 --> 00:09:53,916 You've gotta get on Hinge. 139 00:09:54,000 --> 00:09:55,250 It's amazing. 140 00:09:55,333 --> 00:09:58,333 Except for the part where you feel like a hideous, unlovable troll 141 00:09:58,416 --> 00:10:00,041 that might match with Ted Bundy. 142 00:10:00,708 --> 00:10:03,000 I've never been drier. 143 00:10:03,083 --> 00:10:06,083 I think I'd rather just live vicariously through you. 144 00:10:06,166 --> 00:10:07,166 Perfect. 145 00:10:10,958 --> 00:10:12,375 -Hello? -Yeah. I'm here. 146 00:10:12,458 --> 00:10:13,875 -Hi. -No… 147 00:10:13,958 --> 00:10:16,416 I have to tell you something. Don't freak out. 148 00:10:16,500 --> 00:10:17,500 What? 149 00:10:20,416 --> 00:10:21,708 Test results came back. 150 00:10:22,291 --> 00:10:25,250 -Why didn't you call me? -I literally just did. 151 00:10:25,333 --> 00:10:28,791 They're, uh… listing me for a lung transplant. 152 00:10:30,250 --> 00:10:32,291 It's lookin' pretty dire. 153 00:10:33,625 --> 00:10:35,250 They don't know what they're talking about. 154 00:10:35,333 --> 00:10:39,625 I mean, they've been wrong every single step of the way. 155 00:10:39,708 --> 00:10:41,708 You're fine, because… 156 00:10:41,791 --> 00:10:44,583 Because you're a superhero. Have they still not figured that out yet? 157 00:10:46,041 --> 00:10:47,375 Yeah, I guess not. 158 00:10:48,625 --> 00:10:50,583 -Tsk. I'm gonna come home. -No. 159 00:10:50,666 --> 00:10:52,000 -I'll look up flights now. -No. 160 00:10:52,083 --> 00:10:55,291 It's not because of the results. I miss you. I need to see you. 161 00:10:55,375 --> 00:10:57,750 You're gonna be home in three weeks for turkey. 162 00:10:57,833 --> 00:11:00,750 -For the weekend. -If you do, I will kick you in the tit. 163 00:11:00,833 --> 00:11:04,041 You'll never make baker if you fly home every time they give us shit news. 164 00:11:04,125 --> 00:11:06,041 -No, I'm-- -You are being so dramatic. 165 00:11:06,125 --> 00:11:08,333 -I'm not being dramatic! -This is not A Walk to Remember. 166 00:11:09,416 --> 00:11:10,958 But is it A Fault in Our Stars? 167 00:11:12,416 --> 00:11:14,625 Shailene would def play me in my biopic. 168 00:11:15,833 --> 00:11:17,583 -But no. -Okay, fine. 169 00:11:18,083 --> 00:11:20,416 But I'll see you in three weeks. Turkey! 170 00:11:23,291 --> 00:11:24,125 Jill? 171 00:11:25,250 --> 00:11:26,250 Yes, my lad? 172 00:11:30,500 --> 00:11:33,208 You're the most lovable person I've ever known. 173 00:11:35,708 --> 00:11:37,958 If you're a bird, I'm a bird, brother. 174 00:11:39,916 --> 00:11:41,125 Call me tomorrow? 175 00:11:42,333 --> 00:11:43,208 Night. 176 00:11:43,291 --> 00:11:44,291 Good night. 177 00:11:59,083 --> 00:12:03,083 Jill, look, I want to be absolutely translucent. 178 00:12:03,833 --> 00:12:05,791 -"Transparent"? -That too. 179 00:12:05,875 --> 00:12:10,958 Uh, listen, I am down to, like, hang, 180 00:12:11,041 --> 00:12:13,375 but not for anything, like, intense. 181 00:12:13,458 --> 00:12:17,000 -Oh… -But I am 100% committed to-- 182 00:12:17,083 --> 00:12:18,458 Penetration? 183 00:12:18,541 --> 00:12:20,000 Yes! 184 00:12:20,083 --> 00:12:24,041 Oh, my God, yes. Yeah. We are, like, on the same wavelength. 185 00:12:24,125 --> 00:12:26,791 We are just over here, finishing each other's-- 186 00:12:26,875 --> 00:12:29,875 Minds! 187 00:12:31,875 --> 00:12:32,833 I'm gonna take this. 188 00:12:39,583 --> 00:12:42,333 Jill, honey, you need to come home right now. 189 00:12:42,416 --> 00:12:43,875 Call me when you get this. 190 00:12:47,166 --> 00:12:50,666 Mom, I'm here. What's going on? How is she? 191 00:12:52,041 --> 00:12:54,791 Talk to me. What's going on? 192 00:12:54,875 --> 00:12:57,333 -What are they saying? -She crashed suddenly. 193 00:12:57,416 --> 00:12:58,291 Okay. 194 00:12:58,375 --> 00:13:00,125 Her oxygen levels dropped. 195 00:13:01,541 --> 00:13:03,125 She didn't make it. 196 00:13:04,166 --> 00:13:05,708 Izzy didn't make it. 197 00:13:07,041 --> 00:13:09,250 Okay. What are they saying? 198 00:13:09,750 --> 00:13:12,208 Jill, honey… 199 00:13:12,291 --> 00:13:13,625 Mom, where is she? 200 00:13:14,125 --> 00:13:15,791 She didn't make it, honey. 201 00:13:15,875 --> 00:13:17,458 I'm here. Where is she? 202 00:13:19,041 --> 00:13:20,125 Where is she? 203 00:13:21,500 --> 00:13:23,208 -Jill, honey… -Where is she? 204 00:13:24,166 --> 00:13:25,958 -Jill. -Izzy? 205 00:14:04,666 --> 00:14:06,791 Izzy was dealt… 206 00:14:09,500 --> 00:14:11,208 a bullshit hand. 207 00:14:14,250 --> 00:14:16,750 But she never ever complained. 208 00:14:18,416 --> 00:14:19,958 She was beyond that. 209 00:14:22,666 --> 00:14:28,250 And she believed in angels and fate. 210 00:14:30,916 --> 00:14:33,708 In an "order" of things. 211 00:14:36,500 --> 00:14:38,833 I think she would have really loved Burning Man. 212 00:14:41,916 --> 00:14:45,000 So, um… today, 213 00:14:45,083 --> 00:14:47,500 rather than eviscerating this… 214 00:14:49,625 --> 00:14:51,750 order of things that I don't understand, 215 00:14:51,833 --> 00:14:53,958 um, I'm gonna try my best. 216 00:14:54,041 --> 00:14:57,458 I'm gonna try my best to make lemonade, like Izzy. 217 00:14:58,291 --> 00:14:59,583 And Beyoncé. 218 00:15:04,916 --> 00:15:07,750 Isabelle could have been alive a thousand years ago, 219 00:15:07,833 --> 00:15:09,208 or a thousand years from now, 220 00:15:09,291 --> 00:15:13,083 but what are the chances that in all of time, space, humanity, 221 00:15:13,166 --> 00:15:16,208 she was alive with us, right? 222 00:15:18,791 --> 00:15:19,916 With me. 223 00:15:21,333 --> 00:15:24,666 How lucky are we? And not only did she and I meet. 224 00:15:28,625 --> 00:15:29,625 But… 225 00:15:33,375 --> 00:15:35,916 But we got to eat pancakes. 226 00:15:36,833 --> 00:15:40,208 We got to… wiggle out our little baby teeth together. 227 00:15:40,291 --> 00:15:42,625 We got to paint each other's toenails. 228 00:15:47,791 --> 00:15:49,500 We got to be sisters. 229 00:15:51,916 --> 00:15:53,750 We got to be sisters. 230 00:15:54,416 --> 00:15:59,750 Built a home 231 00:16:01,083 --> 00:16:02,666 For you 232 00:16:04,375 --> 00:16:07,250 For me 233 00:16:08,166 --> 00:16:15,125 Until it disappeared 234 00:16:17,000 --> 00:16:19,125 From me 235 00:16:20,291 --> 00:16:23,500 From you 236 00:16:27,958 --> 00:16:32,041 My brother in Christ. We miss you on Whore Island. 237 00:16:35,916 --> 00:16:39,083 My brother in Christ. We miss you on Whore Island. 238 00:16:39,166 --> 00:16:42,375 Don't forget. You're more beautiful than Cinderella. 239 00:16:42,458 --> 00:16:46,875 You smell like pine needles, and you have a face like sunshine. 240 00:16:46,958 --> 00:16:50,583 When I look at you, my heart is filled with purple and pink fireworks. 241 00:16:50,666 --> 00:16:51,583 Be ungovernable. 242 00:16:51,666 --> 00:16:53,291 You gotta flop to fly. 243 00:16:53,375 --> 00:16:57,083 We could open a chowder spot and call it "Bisquey Business." 244 00:16:57,166 --> 00:17:00,625 I just drank all of Mom's rosé and DMed Jacob Elordi. 245 00:17:00,708 --> 00:17:03,458 Maybe he'll think I'm a Make-a-Wish kid. 246 00:17:04,125 --> 00:17:06,333 Good night, lad. I love you. 247 00:17:07,375 --> 00:17:08,416 Call me. 248 00:17:55,000 --> 00:17:56,000 Who is that? 249 00:17:56,666 --> 00:17:59,250 I don't know. I just got a new work cell. 250 00:18:01,333 --> 00:18:05,458 Yo, Isabella! 251 00:18:05,541 --> 00:18:07,416 It is I, your brother. 252 00:18:07,500 --> 00:18:10,583 I'm sitting here at my bench. 253 00:18:10,666 --> 00:18:14,083 I'm looking out at the Golden Gate Bridge. It's a beautiful night. 254 00:18:14,166 --> 00:18:16,333 I'm drinking champagne… 255 00:18:17,416 --> 00:18:18,791 out of a brown paper bag, 256 00:18:18,875 --> 00:18:21,416 and I am missing you. 257 00:18:22,000 --> 00:18:24,458 Oh, my God, I hate this place. 258 00:18:24,541 --> 00:18:26,500 Where are our weirdos, man? 259 00:18:26,583 --> 00:18:33,500 You know, I thought SF was gonna be full of rock-and-roll hippies in drag 260 00:18:33,583 --> 00:18:37,333 who love pot and Journey and burritos. 261 00:18:37,416 --> 00:18:40,875 But where the hell is the José's here? Where are the…? 262 00:18:40,958 --> 00:18:45,375 And whose dick do I have to suck 263 00:18:45,458 --> 00:18:49,083 to get a breakfast taco around here?! 264 00:18:50,541 --> 00:18:54,166 I love you, brother. 265 00:18:54,250 --> 00:18:58,750 You are such a bitch for leaving before I could tell you that. 266 00:19:04,708 --> 00:19:06,625 We need to talk about boundaries. 267 00:19:17,583 --> 00:19:20,708 -Good night, Arthur. See you tomorrow. -Good night, see ya. 268 00:19:20,791 --> 00:19:22,291 -Hey, Jill? -Yeah? 269 00:19:24,208 --> 00:19:25,291 You wanna grab a drink? 270 00:19:26,875 --> 00:19:30,250 So, that was a sorta long-ass vacation you took, Jill. 271 00:19:30,333 --> 00:19:32,375 Oh, my sister sorta… 272 00:19:33,208 --> 00:19:34,291 died. 273 00:19:34,375 --> 00:19:35,833 -Dang. -Yeah. 274 00:19:35,916 --> 00:19:37,916 Jill, that is hella sad. 275 00:19:38,000 --> 00:19:40,250 Thanks, yeah. So how have you been? 276 00:19:40,875 --> 00:19:44,083 Amazing. Life is just… perfect. 277 00:19:44,166 --> 00:19:48,208 Everything is working for me, Jill. Everything is exactly where it should be. 278 00:19:48,916 --> 00:19:49,791 How are you? 279 00:19:49,875 --> 00:19:51,583 I'm done, Wes. 280 00:19:51,666 --> 00:19:53,916 -With your cider, or…? -With us. 281 00:19:54,000 --> 00:19:56,375 What? We're just getting to know each other. 282 00:19:57,000 --> 00:19:58,875 You've been inside of me for six months. 283 00:19:58,958 --> 00:20:03,750 Pastries, baking, it's a chick thing, traditionally. 284 00:20:03,833 --> 00:20:05,333 But that's so sexist, right? 285 00:20:05,416 --> 00:20:07,875 Because I can do anything my mom can do. 286 00:20:09,041 --> 00:20:13,541 I am trying to hold space for your brokenness. 287 00:20:14,208 --> 00:20:16,583 But I deserve secure attachment, 288 00:20:17,166 --> 00:20:20,708 not someone who love bombs me like I'm on The Bachelor, 289 00:20:20,791 --> 00:20:25,916 and then the moment that I catch feels brings me to Buffalo Wild Wings. 290 00:20:26,000 --> 00:20:27,750 -You said you liked wings. -I lied! 291 00:20:29,250 --> 00:20:31,541 Excuse me, can I get one of those? Thank you so much. 292 00:20:31,625 --> 00:20:32,750 Cheers! 293 00:20:34,791 --> 00:20:37,166 God, you're so beautiful. 294 00:20:37,250 --> 00:20:39,750 You're like easily a 6.5. 295 00:20:40,458 --> 00:20:42,958 Like, an SF 6.5, a Kansas ten. 296 00:20:43,041 --> 00:20:45,583 -Do you want another shot? -Can we get… one more of those? 297 00:20:45,666 --> 00:20:47,375 I just wanna hear you say it, Wes. 298 00:20:47,458 --> 00:20:49,125 You don't know how to love. 299 00:20:49,708 --> 00:20:53,083 That's… No. I don't think that-- Britt. 300 00:20:53,916 --> 00:20:56,208 -Britt, listen. Hey, stop. -Stop. 301 00:20:56,291 --> 00:20:59,416 I'm sorry. I can't claim to understand 302 00:20:59,500 --> 00:21:02,666 all the ways that my trauma has affected me, 303 00:21:02,750 --> 00:21:05,750 but I know that… 304 00:21:06,375 --> 00:21:08,083 I'm genuinely sorry. 305 00:21:10,333 --> 00:21:13,625 Are you a man? 'Cause I'm a bitch 306 00:21:13,708 --> 00:21:14,875 You're strong. 307 00:21:14,958 --> 00:21:16,833 You've been a bad boy. 308 00:21:20,375 --> 00:21:21,958 -Don't touch my hair. -Okay. Sorry. 309 00:21:22,041 --> 00:21:23,416 Joyride 310 00:21:23,500 --> 00:21:24,833 Joyride 311 00:21:24,916 --> 00:21:27,083 I'm just looking for a good time 312 00:21:27,666 --> 00:21:30,541 Tell me everything's gonna be okay. 313 00:21:33,000 --> 00:21:35,041 Everything's gonna be okay. 314 00:21:35,125 --> 00:21:36,416 Hm? 315 00:21:36,500 --> 00:21:37,583 Say it again. 316 00:21:37,666 --> 00:21:39,750 No, I can't. I… 317 00:21:39,833 --> 00:21:41,291 To be honest, I don't… 318 00:21:42,291 --> 00:21:45,625 Between climate change and the unraveling of democracy, 319 00:21:45,708 --> 00:21:47,833 I don't really think that everything is… 320 00:21:52,708 --> 00:21:54,875 -Tell me. -Everything's gonna be okay. 321 00:21:59,291 --> 00:22:01,625 Oh! 322 00:22:09,916 --> 00:22:11,333 Sorry. 323 00:22:11,416 --> 00:22:12,875 Joyride 324 00:22:17,083 --> 00:22:18,250 What's up, babe? 325 00:22:18,333 --> 00:22:19,166 Hey. 326 00:22:19,250 --> 00:22:23,250 So, I cannot stop thinking about last night. 327 00:22:23,333 --> 00:22:24,291 Oh! 328 00:22:24,375 --> 00:22:27,666 Yeah. I got several noise complaints. 329 00:22:28,458 --> 00:22:29,291 Did you? 330 00:22:29,375 --> 00:22:31,166 What do you say tonight… 331 00:22:32,375 --> 00:22:35,791 my bear claw goes in your croissant? 332 00:22:36,583 --> 00:22:39,916 No. 333 00:22:40,000 --> 00:22:41,833 No. No, you can't handle this. 334 00:22:48,625 --> 00:22:50,666 No? Isn't…? 335 00:22:52,541 --> 00:22:53,500 -Hey. -I feel sick. 336 00:22:53,583 --> 00:22:55,500 No, I'm sorry. 337 00:22:55,583 --> 00:22:59,416 No, it's good. I'm good. We're good, 'kay? 338 00:22:59,500 --> 00:23:01,000 -Okay. -Jill. 339 00:23:01,083 --> 00:23:02,708 I'm cool. 340 00:23:02,791 --> 00:23:05,166 Cool as a kumquat. 341 00:23:10,416 --> 00:23:13,833 You used me like a human dildo. 342 00:23:13,916 --> 00:23:15,708 And you kicked me to the curb. 343 00:23:15,791 --> 00:23:18,583 -What are you talking about? -I'm talking about what you did. 344 00:23:18,666 --> 00:23:21,791 -What I did? I-- -You're… You gaslit me. 345 00:23:21,875 --> 00:23:23,166 And you're gonna regret it. 346 00:23:26,291 --> 00:23:27,375 Um… 347 00:23:27,458 --> 00:23:31,625 I've found a reason to exist 348 00:23:31,708 --> 00:23:35,958 Begging not to go extinct 349 00:23:36,041 --> 00:23:38,708 Do what you saw 350 00:23:46,916 --> 00:23:49,625 Fefe, I got you a triple-shot latte to thank you. 351 00:23:49,708 --> 00:23:53,250 Shh! That was the last time, Wes. 352 00:23:53,333 --> 00:23:54,791 It's a felony. 353 00:23:54,875 --> 00:23:55,875 Reading texts? 354 00:23:55,958 --> 00:23:59,291 Hacking someone's texts for insider info to sell commercial real estate? 355 00:23:59,916 --> 00:24:01,666 -Yes, a felony. -I don't-- 356 00:24:01,750 --> 00:24:03,000 In all 50 states. 357 00:24:03,083 --> 00:24:05,958 Including Idaho, where cannibalism is legal. 358 00:24:06,041 --> 00:24:07,416 I'm out, Wes. 359 00:24:07,500 --> 00:24:10,625 You're gonna have to stalk people the same way as everyone else. 360 00:24:10,708 --> 00:24:11,541 Instagram. 361 00:24:11,625 --> 00:24:13,291 All right, no, I see the play. 362 00:24:13,375 --> 00:24:14,916 I will pay you double 363 00:24:15,000 --> 00:24:19,250 and then you can buy yourself more sweater vests or Pokémon cards or-- 364 00:24:19,333 --> 00:24:20,250 Pokémon? 365 00:24:20,333 --> 00:24:22,916 You know what? I'm done being your little hacker boy. 366 00:24:23,000 --> 00:24:29,375 So you can take your lattes and your shiny teeth back upstairs. 367 00:24:30,000 --> 00:24:32,375 Okay. All right. Understood. 368 00:24:34,208 --> 00:24:35,375 I appreciate you, Fefe. 369 00:24:35,458 --> 00:24:38,833 Uh, he's in a meeting right now. Can I take a message? 370 00:24:38,916 --> 00:24:40,750 Okay, sure. Just call back. 371 00:24:40,833 --> 00:24:42,666 It's Felix! 372 00:24:47,083 --> 00:24:50,916 Oh, my God. You went on that date with the guy with the pink eye. 373 00:24:51,000 --> 00:24:53,375 Yeah, that's me. 374 00:24:53,958 --> 00:24:55,500 It's been weeks, I bet his eye's healed. 375 00:24:55,583 --> 00:24:57,333 Maybe I should hit him up for a second date? 376 00:24:57,416 --> 00:25:01,500 No, that was a joke. I'm actually on a… dick cleanse. 377 00:25:02,416 --> 00:25:07,000 A D-tox, if you will. Patiently awaiting my gay awakening. 378 00:25:07,083 --> 00:25:10,375 -Did you know what you wanted? -I'll have a mocha to go. Please. Thanks. 379 00:25:13,125 --> 00:25:14,375 Ever been stood up? 380 00:25:16,250 --> 00:25:19,250 -Oh, are you talking to me? -I overheard your conversation. 381 00:25:19,333 --> 00:25:20,250 Oh, great. 382 00:25:20,333 --> 00:25:21,791 Have I been stood up? 383 00:25:22,416 --> 00:25:23,625 Actually, no. 384 00:25:23,708 --> 00:25:26,708 So… I still have that to look forward to. 385 00:25:26,791 --> 00:25:28,208 Well, I have you beat, then. 386 00:25:28,291 --> 00:25:30,333 I am currently being stood up. 387 00:25:30,416 --> 00:25:31,958 -On a day date? -Yeah. 388 00:25:32,041 --> 00:25:32,875 Yikes. 389 00:25:32,958 --> 00:25:33,875 Yikes is right. 390 00:25:34,458 --> 00:25:35,458 Sorry. 391 00:25:39,583 --> 00:25:41,708 Would you maybe want to join me? 392 00:25:43,000 --> 00:25:47,208 Please. I don't think my fragile male ego could handle another rejection today. 393 00:25:49,166 --> 00:25:50,083 Um, what's your name? 394 00:25:50,166 --> 00:25:51,041 Tyler Riordan. 395 00:25:51,125 --> 00:25:52,333 Jill Shaw. 396 00:25:52,416 --> 00:25:53,583 -Lady Shaw. -Thanks. 397 00:25:53,666 --> 00:25:57,208 Tyler Riordan sounds so familiar. Are you a tech founder? 398 00:25:58,208 --> 00:25:59,166 Not smart enough. 399 00:25:59,250 --> 00:26:00,125 Actor? 400 00:26:00,208 --> 00:26:02,166 Hmph! Not pretty enough. 401 00:26:02,250 --> 00:26:04,166 Oh, you're not pretty enough? 402 00:26:04,250 --> 00:26:05,916 Okay. So you're an influencer. 403 00:26:07,500 --> 00:26:09,625 The irony is palpable. 404 00:26:09,708 --> 00:26:10,750 Wait. 405 00:26:10,833 --> 00:26:14,250 You have the, um, dating podcast. 406 00:26:14,333 --> 00:26:16,000 You're the dating guy. 407 00:26:16,083 --> 00:26:18,875 Hi! Nice to meet you, Tyler Riordan. 408 00:26:18,958 --> 00:26:20,041 Oh, my God. 409 00:26:20,125 --> 00:26:24,500 Tyler, my phone died, and I had to find my way back from the East Bay. 410 00:26:24,583 --> 00:26:27,541 I completely raw-dogged it with my mind. 411 00:26:27,625 --> 00:26:29,625 No worries. I ran into a friend. 412 00:26:31,625 --> 00:26:33,208 -Yes. -Mm-hmm. 413 00:26:33,916 --> 00:26:36,208 Well, nice to see you, friend. Have a seat. 414 00:26:36,291 --> 00:26:37,833 No, no, no. We can get another table. 415 00:26:37,916 --> 00:26:39,958 No, no, no, please. Please sit. 416 00:26:40,041 --> 00:26:43,333 Um, I'm just gonna grab my stuff. 417 00:26:43,875 --> 00:26:45,375 Nice to meet you, ma'am. 418 00:26:45,458 --> 00:26:48,125 Take your seat. I've warmed it up for you. 419 00:26:48,208 --> 00:26:50,125 -I'm so sorry. I'm just gonna… Yeah. -Yeah. 420 00:26:50,208 --> 00:26:51,916 Cool. Bye. 421 00:26:52,000 --> 00:26:52,958 Jill! 422 00:26:54,416 --> 00:26:55,375 Hi. 423 00:26:56,000 --> 00:26:58,708 I figured I could let you leave. Then I'd have to go home, 424 00:26:58,791 --> 00:27:02,458 get on Craigslist, and write a post on Missed Connections. Very early 2000s. 425 00:27:03,708 --> 00:27:05,541 Or I could just run out on my date, 426 00:27:05,625 --> 00:27:08,083 chase you down the street, and ask you for your number, 427 00:27:08,166 --> 00:27:10,208 which now that I say it out loud… 428 00:27:10,291 --> 00:27:12,583 uh, maybe Craigslist was the move. 429 00:27:14,750 --> 00:27:16,833 I'm swearing off men, remember? 430 00:27:16,916 --> 00:27:20,166 -The whole D-tox thing, so… -Yes. D-toxing. Right. 431 00:27:20,250 --> 00:27:21,291 I can't. 432 00:27:22,500 --> 00:27:26,208 -Nice to meet you. -Well, how about I give you my number? 433 00:27:28,541 --> 00:27:29,541 Okay. 434 00:27:57,583 --> 00:27:59,750 Izzy? 435 00:28:01,250 --> 00:28:03,458 You're not gonna believe this. 436 00:28:03,541 --> 00:28:07,458 It was some Notting Hill, frickin' Bridget Jones shit. 437 00:28:07,541 --> 00:28:09,208 Please get ready. 438 00:28:09,291 --> 00:28:10,291 You know what he was? 439 00:28:10,375 --> 00:28:13,583 He was Bri-hi-ti-hish 440 00:28:13,666 --> 00:28:16,041 from foggy London town. 441 00:28:16,125 --> 00:28:19,041 Actually, I don't know if he was from London, but I'm gonna pause 442 00:28:19,125 --> 00:28:20,916 so that you can finish masturbating. 443 00:28:32,833 --> 00:28:33,958 Good work, Wes. 444 00:28:34,041 --> 00:28:35,375 Thank you, sir. 445 00:28:35,458 --> 00:28:37,375 -Close her up. -You got it. 446 00:28:37,458 --> 00:28:38,625 All right. 447 00:28:44,458 --> 00:28:45,291 Jill. 448 00:28:45,375 --> 00:28:46,416 Hey, psst! 449 00:28:47,875 --> 00:28:49,666 Fuck you. 450 00:28:50,416 --> 00:28:51,250 Line up! 451 00:28:53,041 --> 00:28:54,791 I have a little bit of a puzzle. 452 00:28:54,875 --> 00:28:57,833 Zella, Bastien à la crème. 453 00:28:57,916 --> 00:28:59,458 What are the ingredients? 454 00:28:59,541 --> 00:29:03,041 All-purpose flour, almond flour, powdered and granulated sugar, whole egg, 455 00:29:03,125 --> 00:29:06,333 cream, unsalted butter, vanilla bean, and salt, Chef. 456 00:29:07,541 --> 00:29:09,166 Did you say "human hair"? 457 00:29:09,250 --> 00:29:10,458 No, I did not, Chef. 458 00:29:10,541 --> 00:29:13,583 That puts me in a real snickerdoodle. 459 00:29:27,625 --> 00:29:29,375 Oh, now, wait a second. 460 00:29:29,875 --> 00:29:31,916 Kirby, why do I see 461 00:29:32,000 --> 00:29:36,625 one of your radioactive Chucky-doll pubes in my tart? 462 00:29:37,250 --> 00:29:39,291 That is not mine. 463 00:29:40,208 --> 00:29:41,458 That's not yours? 464 00:29:41,541 --> 00:29:44,500 Right there, on the little titty… part. 465 00:29:45,041 --> 00:29:46,125 -No. -No? 466 00:29:46,208 --> 00:29:49,333 Oh, did Little Orphan Annie come into my kitchen last night 467 00:29:49,416 --> 00:29:51,708 and shed her ginger ass on this tart? 468 00:29:52,583 --> 00:29:53,583 I don't know. 469 00:29:53,666 --> 00:29:55,208 -You don't know? -Mm-mm. 470 00:29:59,375 --> 00:30:01,916 It was so unhinged, my dude. 471 00:30:02,000 --> 00:30:03,041 But… 472 00:30:04,041 --> 00:30:05,541 there is a silver lining. 473 00:30:06,333 --> 00:30:08,708 Or shall I say a ginger lining? 474 00:30:08,791 --> 00:30:11,583 Damn, Jilleth. I know. Too soon. 475 00:30:11,666 --> 00:30:13,916 Look, I take no pleasure in saying this, 476 00:30:14,583 --> 00:30:18,375 but the baker position is now open! 477 00:30:20,541 --> 00:30:21,791 Finally! 478 00:30:22,958 --> 00:30:26,291 But what are the qualifications to host a podcast? 479 00:30:26,375 --> 00:30:27,750 -Qualifications? -Yes. 480 00:30:27,833 --> 00:30:28,958 -There are none. -Really? 481 00:30:29,041 --> 00:30:31,000 -Thought so. -I'm virtually skill-less. 482 00:30:31,541 --> 00:30:34,083 I just think that the dating game has gotten somewhat toxic. 483 00:30:34,166 --> 00:30:36,000 I don't know, it's going great for me. 484 00:30:36,083 --> 00:30:37,875 Haven't been murdered yet. 485 00:30:38,708 --> 00:30:39,916 Well, the night is young. 486 00:30:43,000 --> 00:30:45,000 Tell me about your work, Chef. 487 00:30:45,958 --> 00:30:49,583 Well, I don't want to flex on you too hard, but, uh… 488 00:30:50,291 --> 00:30:52,416 I am the kumquat girl of Flâner. 489 00:30:53,333 --> 00:30:55,500 -Oh, wow. -Yeah. 490 00:30:55,583 --> 00:30:56,500 -I'm impressed. -Mm-hm. 491 00:30:56,583 --> 00:30:58,708 Though I'm not entirely sure what a kumquat is. 492 00:30:58,791 --> 00:31:03,541 They're like very tiny, very annoying oranges. 493 00:31:03,625 --> 00:31:05,000 -Ah. -And I am their leader. 494 00:31:07,333 --> 00:31:08,958 Yes. Wait. 495 00:31:09,041 --> 00:31:11,041 Flâner? Isn't that the fellow from Top Chef? 496 00:31:11,125 --> 00:31:14,916 Chef Bastien. I'm currently in a battle to the death to become his new baker, 497 00:31:15,000 --> 00:31:18,166 in the hopes that, one day, I do actually get to bake. 498 00:31:18,250 --> 00:31:20,291 Well, take no prisoners, kumquat girl. 499 00:31:21,375 --> 00:31:22,875 -Thank you so much. -Thank you. 500 00:31:22,958 --> 00:31:23,916 Of course. 501 00:31:24,416 --> 00:31:26,416 So how are the fish and chips compared to back home? 502 00:31:26,500 --> 00:31:27,958 Not bad, actually. 503 00:31:28,041 --> 00:31:30,291 Yeah? I've never been to England. 504 00:31:30,375 --> 00:31:31,416 It's amazing. 505 00:31:32,083 --> 00:31:33,208 I'll have to take you. 506 00:31:34,708 --> 00:31:37,166 Daddy's home 507 00:31:37,250 --> 00:31:39,666 Home for me 508 00:31:39,750 --> 00:31:43,791 And I know you've been Waiting for this loving all day 509 00:31:43,875 --> 00:31:46,333 You know your daddy's home 510 00:31:46,416 --> 00:31:48,750 -Daddy's home -And it's time to play 511 00:31:48,833 --> 00:31:50,625 -It's time to play -Yeah 512 00:31:50,708 --> 00:31:54,333 So you ain't got to Give my loving away 513 00:31:54,416 --> 00:31:55,250 Mm! 514 00:31:55,333 --> 00:31:59,333 So all my ladies say hey, hey Hey, daddy-- 515 00:32:06,708 --> 00:32:08,000 Okay, you gotta go. 516 00:32:08,083 --> 00:32:09,541 -You have to go. Get up. -What? 517 00:32:09,625 --> 00:32:10,833 -Now? -Yep, right now. 518 00:32:10,916 --> 00:32:13,916 -Okay. -That's all your stuff. Yep. Come on! 519 00:32:14,000 --> 00:32:15,708 -Was it something that I did? -Hurry! 520 00:32:15,791 --> 00:32:17,208 -No. Go! -No problem. 521 00:32:17,291 --> 00:32:18,666 Well, I had a great time. 522 00:32:18,750 --> 00:32:20,333 -Bye. -Bye. 523 00:32:22,375 --> 00:32:23,500 Come on. 524 00:32:33,125 --> 00:32:36,375 I didn't think I could do it, but I did it! 525 00:32:37,875 --> 00:32:40,125 Come on. Call. 526 00:32:40,208 --> 00:32:41,958 Please record your message. 527 00:32:42,041 --> 00:32:43,583 Hello, Izzy. 528 00:32:43,666 --> 00:32:45,958 I would like to tell you something, 529 00:32:46,041 --> 00:32:49,333 that it was very, very, very, very, very, very close, 530 00:32:49,416 --> 00:32:51,291 but I kept it in my pants, 531 00:32:51,375 --> 00:32:55,208 because my body is a sacred temple, 532 00:32:55,291 --> 00:32:58,000 and my vagina is a secret garden. 533 00:32:58,083 --> 00:33:01,125 I… I am Jillothene Shaw! 534 00:33:01,208 --> 00:33:06,791 Resistor of desires of the flesh, almighty tamer of sexual demons! 535 00:33:06,875 --> 00:33:09,500 I am Jill! 536 00:33:11,000 --> 00:33:12,958 I left my wallet. 537 00:33:15,333 --> 00:33:16,291 Help. 538 00:33:18,625 --> 00:33:22,083 I promise I barely heard anything. 539 00:33:22,166 --> 00:33:23,208 Oh, my God. 540 00:33:24,041 --> 00:33:26,000 I do have one question though. 541 00:33:28,708 --> 00:33:31,375 What was that about a secret garden? 542 00:33:33,416 --> 00:33:34,666 God damn it. 543 00:33:36,208 --> 00:33:38,291 I left my wallet. 544 00:33:38,375 --> 00:33:40,708 -No! No, Jill, no! -Oh, my God. 545 00:33:40,791 --> 00:33:43,666 God, lock your door, Jill. 546 00:33:43,750 --> 00:33:45,333 You don't lock your door? 547 00:33:45,416 --> 00:33:48,666 -Promise I barely heard anything. -Oh, God. 548 00:33:55,250 --> 00:33:59,750 They're probably hooking up right now. They're definitely hooking up. 549 00:34:00,666 --> 00:34:02,000 Well, whatever. 550 00:34:06,291 --> 00:34:07,833 He probably has terrible teeth. 551 00:34:14,041 --> 00:34:15,625 No text. Hm. 552 00:34:17,000 --> 00:34:18,000 Okay. 553 00:34:18,666 --> 00:34:22,250 Don't be crazy. You're being crazy. 554 00:34:22,333 --> 00:34:24,958 Ladies, save yourself the heartache. 555 00:34:25,041 --> 00:34:29,916 If he's not texting you, he doesn't want to talk to you. 556 00:34:30,000 --> 00:34:32,958 Truth is so important. We all need to get… 557 00:34:33,041 --> 00:34:33,875 What? 558 00:34:39,875 --> 00:34:41,458 Check. 559 00:35:15,625 --> 00:35:16,666 Good night, Izzy. 560 00:35:18,166 --> 00:35:19,416 Good night, lad. 561 00:35:19,500 --> 00:35:20,583 I love you. 562 00:35:22,041 --> 00:35:23,500 I love you too. 563 00:35:25,541 --> 00:35:29,291 Okay, you know as best man that you have to give a speech, right? 564 00:35:29,375 --> 00:35:31,625 He didn't. 565 00:35:31,708 --> 00:35:33,583 -Oh, come on. I knew that. -No idea. 566 00:35:33,666 --> 00:35:35,458 I knew that. You guys think so little of me. 567 00:35:35,541 --> 00:35:38,958 We do not. We think very highly of you, but I should write it. 568 00:35:39,041 --> 00:35:41,500 And after much deliberation… 569 00:35:41,583 --> 00:35:43,500 -Yeah? -…we're giving you a plus-one. 570 00:35:43,583 --> 00:35:44,833 -Yes! -But… 571 00:35:44,916 --> 00:35:49,500 You do not get to bring an influencer whose actual name you do not know. 572 00:35:49,583 --> 00:35:50,708 I knew her name. 573 00:35:50,791 --> 00:35:52,708 -You didn't know her name. -Not at all. 574 00:35:52,791 --> 00:35:54,583 You're talking about Lu, right? 575 00:35:54,666 --> 00:35:55,958 Lonestar Lu? 576 00:35:56,041 --> 00:35:59,375 -Lonestar Lu was her handle. -Mm-hm. 577 00:35:59,458 --> 00:36:02,750 Her name was Keilani. 578 00:36:02,833 --> 00:36:05,166 I mean, that's just confusing branding. 579 00:36:05,250 --> 00:36:06,500 -Bye. -Go. 580 00:36:06,583 --> 00:36:07,583 -Beat it. -Really? 581 00:36:07,666 --> 00:36:09,000 -Yes. -You can't sit with us. 582 00:36:09,083 --> 00:36:10,500 -You cannot. -Are you serious? 583 00:36:10,583 --> 00:36:13,125 Oh, look, open table. Just for you. 584 00:36:13,208 --> 00:36:14,291 Okay, fine. 585 00:36:15,583 --> 00:36:17,541 -Fine. I'm walking over here. -Fine. 586 00:36:17,625 --> 00:36:19,125 -Bye. -I'll enjoy my tacos alone. 587 00:36:19,208 --> 00:36:20,416 Yeah, enjoy. 588 00:36:24,208 --> 00:36:25,833 -You know what your problem is? -Huh? 589 00:36:25,916 --> 00:36:27,125 You're sad-boy deadly. 590 00:36:27,208 --> 00:36:28,291 -Yeah. -It's your eyes. 591 00:36:28,875 --> 00:36:33,458 Every girl thinks you're a wounded puppy, and you have no idea how gorgeous you are. 592 00:36:33,541 --> 00:36:36,375 -But you're not sad. He's not sad. -Mm-mm. No, he's not. 593 00:36:36,458 --> 00:36:39,416 -And he knows exactly how gorgeous he is. -What? 594 00:36:39,500 --> 00:36:40,708 You think I'm gorgeous, Breeds? 595 00:36:40,791 --> 00:36:42,375 You think he's gorgeous? 596 00:36:42,458 --> 00:36:43,583 -Wait. -I mean… 597 00:36:43,666 --> 00:36:46,333 Now he has two phones to use for evil. 598 00:36:46,416 --> 00:36:47,791 Oh, great. 599 00:36:47,875 --> 00:36:52,916 No. Okay, so this random girl has been leaving voicemails on my new work cell, 600 00:36:53,000 --> 00:36:54,625 and they're for her sister. 601 00:36:54,708 --> 00:36:57,125 -And they're, like, kinda hilarious. -Wait. 602 00:36:57,208 --> 00:36:59,916 How does she not know that her sister changed her number? 603 00:37:00,000 --> 00:37:01,291 -Text her. -I thought I did. 604 00:37:01,375 --> 00:37:05,250 I'm gonna just see what's happening with the douchecaster real quick. 605 00:37:06,541 --> 00:37:08,291 -Douchecaster? -Douchecaster? 606 00:37:08,375 --> 00:37:13,833 Guess who's officially being ghosted by a Hitch wannabe. 607 00:37:13,916 --> 00:37:16,166 I am. 608 00:37:16,250 --> 00:37:19,833 And I am never gonna make baker 609 00:37:19,916 --> 00:37:23,333 because, um, I boned the competition 610 00:37:23,416 --> 00:37:27,000 and now he's out to destroy my life, which rocks. 611 00:37:27,083 --> 00:37:29,000 Um, so, yeah. 612 00:37:30,166 --> 00:37:31,750 I'm, uh… 613 00:37:31,833 --> 00:37:35,875 I'm just calling you to ask… 614 00:37:37,708 --> 00:37:38,916 how… 615 00:37:42,250 --> 00:37:44,666 am I supposed to do this without you? 616 00:37:49,291 --> 00:37:51,416 We were supposed to die together. 617 00:37:52,458 --> 00:37:53,833 We made a deal. 618 00:37:54,416 --> 00:37:57,291 Like Noah and Allie in The Notebook. 619 00:37:58,166 --> 00:38:00,500 "You're a bird, I'm a bird," you whore. 620 00:38:03,541 --> 00:38:05,500 "I wish I knew how to quit you." 621 00:38:06,250 --> 00:38:07,458 Okay, I'll stop. 622 00:38:08,750 --> 00:38:10,583 You're in a better place. 623 00:38:12,375 --> 00:38:15,750 Probably slurping face with Heath Ledger as we speak, huh? 624 00:38:20,583 --> 00:38:22,125 But I miss you. 625 00:38:22,875 --> 00:38:24,083 My lad. 626 00:38:26,500 --> 00:38:27,708 Every minute… 627 00:38:29,541 --> 00:38:31,833 of every single day. 628 00:38:36,625 --> 00:38:38,708 This party sucks without you. 629 00:38:42,083 --> 00:38:43,125 Call me? 630 00:38:49,458 --> 00:38:51,208 Isabelle's dead. They're… 631 00:38:52,125 --> 00:38:54,375 They're voicemails for her dead sister. 632 00:38:54,458 --> 00:38:56,208 -What? -What? 633 00:38:56,291 --> 00:38:58,083 -Oh, my God, that's heartbreaking. -Uh… 634 00:38:58,166 --> 00:39:00,291 You gotta tell her. 635 00:39:00,375 --> 00:39:03,083 -Now you're a sicko. -No, no, no, do not tell her. 636 00:39:03,166 --> 00:39:05,125 She's healing. This is her way of healing. 637 00:39:05,208 --> 00:39:07,750 Just stop listening to her like a creeper, then. 638 00:39:07,833 --> 00:39:10,750 Yeah, maybe stop listening to her like a creeper, then. 639 00:39:13,000 --> 00:39:17,708 You tell him you no longer want to invest in something that isn't going anywhere. 640 00:39:17,791 --> 00:39:19,666 You shut your whore mouth when you talk! 641 00:39:19,750 --> 00:39:21,333 -Wes. -Hey! Hey, Jim. 642 00:39:21,416 --> 00:39:22,458 Red River closed? 643 00:39:22,541 --> 00:39:24,583 -Yes, sir. -Very nice. 644 00:39:24,666 --> 00:39:25,666 What's next? 645 00:39:27,541 --> 00:39:31,708 Hey, is Donovan still slipping on that San Fran spot? 646 00:39:34,166 --> 00:39:38,250 He goes, "Jill, this is exciting." 647 00:39:38,333 --> 00:39:42,208 I shit you not, those were his final words to me. 648 00:39:42,291 --> 00:39:45,000 He has no… soul! 649 00:39:45,083 --> 00:39:47,958 I must protect womankind! 650 00:39:48,041 --> 00:39:49,375 Well, guess what? 651 00:39:51,041 --> 00:39:56,500 Love, Not Actually has a live podcast taping… tomorrow! 652 00:39:58,166 --> 00:40:02,500 And I know, if you were here, I know what you would say. 653 00:40:03,000 --> 00:40:03,916 You would say, 654 00:40:04,000 --> 00:40:07,916 in the immortal words of our queen, 655 00:40:08,500 --> 00:40:10,541 Michelle Obama, esquire, 656 00:40:10,625 --> 00:40:12,083 "When they go low…" 657 00:40:12,666 --> 00:40:15,250 -"We go high." -"…we go lower!" 658 00:40:15,333 --> 00:40:16,750 Okay. 659 00:40:21,125 --> 00:40:23,250 Candy 660 00:40:23,333 --> 00:40:28,291 She's sweet like candy in my veins 661 00:40:29,000 --> 00:40:36,000 Baby, I'm dying for another taste 662 00:40:37,125 --> 00:40:40,875 And every night My mind is running around her… 663 00:40:42,208 --> 00:40:44,166 Excited for the… show. 664 00:40:44,250 --> 00:40:45,166 Thank you. 665 00:40:45,250 --> 00:40:49,250 Oh! I'm so-- Did I step on your foot? I'm so sorry about that. I'm sorry. 666 00:40:49,333 --> 00:40:50,416 I'm sorry. 667 00:40:50,500 --> 00:40:52,083 -So sorry. -No, it's okay. 668 00:40:52,166 --> 00:40:54,916 I can't let you go now that I got it 669 00:40:55,000 --> 00:40:59,916 And all I need is to be struck 670 00:41:00,000 --> 00:41:05,500 By your electric love… 671 00:41:05,583 --> 00:41:06,791 Is that okay? 672 00:41:06,875 --> 00:41:07,958 Perfect. 673 00:41:08,750 --> 00:41:10,583 Baby, your electric-- 674 00:41:25,083 --> 00:41:26,333 Thank you all for coming. 675 00:41:26,416 --> 00:41:28,708 Looking gorgeous as ever, I see. 676 00:41:28,791 --> 00:41:30,166 And we're going live. 677 00:41:32,166 --> 00:41:33,458 Hi there. 678 00:41:35,625 --> 00:41:36,833 Well… 679 00:41:36,916 --> 00:41:39,708 What should we talk about, ladies? 680 00:41:39,791 --> 00:41:41,750 I am at your disposal. 681 00:41:42,250 --> 00:41:44,916 -Now, who wants to kick us off? -Oh, my God. 682 00:41:45,541 --> 00:41:47,125 Me! 683 00:41:47,875 --> 00:41:49,541 Yes, in the Giants hat. 684 00:41:50,750 --> 00:41:51,916 Thank you. 685 00:41:52,750 --> 00:41:55,416 Hey, Tyler. I'm a huge fan. 686 00:41:55,500 --> 00:41:59,083 My favorite episode is the one about dating with accountability. 687 00:42:00,083 --> 00:42:03,125 It's a good one, right? But I had a quick question about that. 688 00:42:03,208 --> 00:42:05,833 Accountability, that's only expected 689 00:42:05,916 --> 00:42:10,250 of us lovelorn, pathetic, desperate ladies, correct? 690 00:42:10,958 --> 00:42:14,083 Fellas get a free pass to, say, I don't know, 691 00:42:14,166 --> 00:42:15,916 like, hypothetically speaking, 692 00:42:16,000 --> 00:42:19,708 talk about bringing you home to England, get you naked, vanish out of thin air 693 00:42:19,791 --> 00:42:22,708 without even a text saying, "I'm alive, but no thank you"? 694 00:42:24,875 --> 00:42:29,625 Um, well, uh, this pod is designed for, uh, women 695 00:42:29,708 --> 00:42:32,916 to navigate the perils of the dating world. 696 00:42:33,000 --> 00:42:34,375 Oh! 697 00:42:34,458 --> 00:42:37,708 Okay, well, thanks to you, Tyler, 698 00:42:37,791 --> 00:42:41,041 I've come face-to-face with the perils of the dating world! 699 00:42:42,083 --> 00:42:45,833 Here's my little bit of "proactive dating advice" 700 00:42:45,916 --> 00:42:46,833 to you ladies. 701 00:42:47,916 --> 00:42:49,708 If it looks like a duck 702 00:42:49,791 --> 00:42:51,791 and it swims like a duck, 703 00:42:52,333 --> 00:42:57,250 it's probably just a bargain-bin, Hugh Grant fuckboy with a podcast. 704 00:43:02,458 --> 00:43:04,083 So… 705 00:43:04,166 --> 00:43:07,875 I'm gonna just, um… see myself out. 706 00:43:09,000 --> 00:43:11,708 I'll give this to you. Thank you, excuse me. I'm sorry. 707 00:43:14,583 --> 00:43:16,458 Boys wanna be her 708 00:43:16,541 --> 00:43:18,041 Girls wanna be her 709 00:43:18,125 --> 00:43:19,708 Boys wanna be her 710 00:43:19,791 --> 00:43:21,791 I wanna be her… 711 00:43:22,958 --> 00:43:24,333 Well, um… 712 00:43:25,083 --> 00:43:27,541 What is testimony without a test? 713 00:43:28,458 --> 00:43:31,375 What is accountability without an account? 714 00:43:31,458 --> 00:43:33,708 I'm sorry. I'm… Excuse me. 715 00:43:39,083 --> 00:43:42,375 Uh, communication is key. 716 00:43:43,375 --> 00:43:46,500 Proactive dating isn't about perfection. 717 00:43:46,583 --> 00:43:48,416 It's about progress. 718 00:43:50,208 --> 00:43:51,291 What? 719 00:43:51,375 --> 00:43:53,500 "If it looks like a duck and swims like a duck, 720 00:43:53,583 --> 00:43:56,583 it's probably just a Hugh Can't with a podcast." 721 00:43:56,666 --> 00:44:00,291 At first it got very, very quiet, and then they were like… 722 00:44:04,250 --> 00:44:05,166 Wow. 723 00:44:05,958 --> 00:44:07,958 Another one bites the dust. 724 00:44:09,583 --> 00:44:14,791 Oh, there's this, um, cute deli at the bus stop 725 00:44:14,875 --> 00:44:17,291 at my bench at Battery Spencer. 726 00:44:17,375 --> 00:44:22,916 I got my salami on sourdough with spicy mustard. 727 00:44:25,166 --> 00:44:26,250 Mmm-mmm. 728 00:44:40,500 --> 00:44:43,750 You're gonna tell me that this is dumb, but whatever. 729 00:44:43,833 --> 00:44:45,208 I have this… 730 00:44:46,541 --> 00:44:49,000 stupid fantasy that… 731 00:44:50,458 --> 00:44:54,125 someone's gonna come and sit down next to me like I'm Meg Ryan. 732 00:44:54,208 --> 00:44:58,000 And we start talking about our days and the weather, 733 00:44:58,083 --> 00:45:01,666 which makes no sense, 'cause it's always foggy. 734 00:45:03,833 --> 00:45:06,875 Maybe I offer him half my sandwich… 735 00:45:09,125 --> 00:45:12,125 and we lock eyes and it happens. We just know. 736 00:45:13,583 --> 00:45:18,333 In our bones, like how birds know when a storm is coming. 737 00:45:20,083 --> 00:45:21,458 How do they do that? 738 00:45:23,333 --> 00:45:24,583 And we can't even play it cool, 739 00:45:24,666 --> 00:45:26,500 because there's nothing cool about what we feel. 740 00:45:26,583 --> 00:45:29,000 It's desperate and all-consuming and really scary, 741 00:45:29,083 --> 00:45:30,666 but we're in it together. 742 00:45:32,833 --> 00:45:34,458 That could happen, right? 743 00:45:37,833 --> 00:45:40,500 Says the girl who can't even get a text back. 744 00:45:49,625 --> 00:45:51,708 I'm sharing this with you, my lad. 745 00:45:54,500 --> 00:45:57,583 And if I didn't know better 746 00:45:57,666 --> 00:46:02,125 I'd think you were listening to me now 747 00:46:04,541 --> 00:46:07,625 If I didn't know better 748 00:46:09,541 --> 00:46:12,708 I'd think you were still around 749 00:46:14,458 --> 00:46:17,083 What died didn't stay dead 750 00:46:17,166 --> 00:46:19,333 What died didn't stay dead 751 00:46:19,416 --> 00:46:22,416 You're alive, so alive 752 00:46:33,750 --> 00:46:35,958 Sorry, is this… Is this seat taken? 753 00:46:50,000 --> 00:46:51,083 It's beautiful. 754 00:46:53,625 --> 00:46:54,750 Mm-hm. 755 00:46:59,000 --> 00:47:00,916 -I'm Wes. -Hm! 756 00:47:11,708 --> 00:47:12,708 I'm Jill. 757 00:47:13,958 --> 00:47:14,916 Jill. 758 00:47:15,416 --> 00:47:16,708 Nice to meet you, Jill. 759 00:47:21,083 --> 00:47:23,125 Well, enjoy the view. 760 00:47:26,375 --> 00:47:28,291 Uh… wait. 761 00:47:29,958 --> 00:47:31,333 Um… 762 00:47:31,416 --> 00:47:33,750 I have to tell you something. 763 00:47:33,833 --> 00:47:36,083 You have to tell me something? 764 00:47:36,750 --> 00:47:43,291 Um, I… I am here… uh, in San Francisco… 765 00:47:45,500 --> 00:47:46,541 for, um… 766 00:47:49,708 --> 00:47:51,833 for, uh… for work, 767 00:47:51,916 --> 00:47:54,416 and I… 768 00:47:55,625 --> 00:47:57,000 I just… 769 00:47:57,541 --> 00:47:58,666 just get… 770 00:47:58,750 --> 00:48:01,875 -I wanted to get a few recs from a local. -Oh! 771 00:48:01,958 --> 00:48:03,500 Did you just have a stroke? 772 00:48:03,583 --> 00:48:05,166 Do you smell burnt toast? 773 00:48:06,875 --> 00:48:10,000 Gosh. I don't know. I'm not a local, by the way. 774 00:48:10,083 --> 00:48:12,208 I've been here a year, so I guess, technically, 775 00:48:12,291 --> 00:48:15,208 but I have not cracked the code of this city. 776 00:48:15,708 --> 00:48:19,625 God damn it, she's a tough nut to crack. Sorry. 777 00:48:19,708 --> 00:48:21,958 Well, what's your favorite thing to do here? 778 00:48:22,041 --> 00:48:23,583 You're looking at it. 779 00:48:23,666 --> 00:48:26,333 Wow. Then I'm off to a good start, huh? 780 00:48:28,458 --> 00:48:30,416 Jeez. 781 00:48:30,500 --> 00:48:33,125 What? 782 00:48:33,208 --> 00:48:35,375 You're rolling in here with all this like… 783 00:48:36,000 --> 00:48:37,458 What is that? 784 00:48:37,541 --> 00:48:42,208 That is why I have to bid you good night and good luck. 785 00:48:42,291 --> 00:48:43,958 I'm closed for business. 786 00:48:44,041 --> 00:48:46,291 Not that I even had any business, or that men… 787 00:48:46,375 --> 00:48:48,541 Men are not my business. Zero judgment. 788 00:48:48,625 --> 00:48:51,000 Love and light to the girlies selling feet pics online. 789 00:48:51,083 --> 00:48:53,666 I tried, but someone said my toes look like ugly fingers, 790 00:48:53,750 --> 00:48:56,666 so I chop… fruit now. 791 00:48:59,333 --> 00:49:01,583 -Should we start over? -Yes, please. 792 00:49:02,083 --> 00:49:03,625 Okay, I'm Wes. 793 00:49:04,125 --> 00:49:05,375 And, uh… 794 00:49:07,208 --> 00:49:08,125 I'm visiting. 795 00:49:08,208 --> 00:49:09,291 I'm Jill. 796 00:49:10,833 --> 00:49:11,750 And I'm boy sober. 797 00:49:11,833 --> 00:49:13,625 Oh, okay. 798 00:49:13,708 --> 00:49:15,041 Nice to meet you. 799 00:49:15,625 --> 00:49:17,000 Nice to meet you. 800 00:49:17,916 --> 00:49:19,166 Oh, uh… 801 00:49:19,250 --> 00:49:20,583 Do you think… 802 00:49:20,666 --> 00:49:23,625 you could just point me in the direction of some breakfast tacos? 803 00:49:30,041 --> 00:49:32,500 -It ain't José's, but it ain't half-bad. -What? 804 00:49:32,583 --> 00:49:34,000 -You know José's? -Oh, yeah. 805 00:49:34,083 --> 00:49:36,166 -José's is my favorite. -José's is my favorite. 806 00:49:36,250 --> 00:49:37,791 So you really are from Tejas, huh? 807 00:49:37,875 --> 00:49:40,458 Yes, ma'am. 808 00:49:40,541 --> 00:49:44,458 So, could you just give me like an opening line 809 00:49:44,541 --> 00:49:46,708 or a thesis statement? 810 00:49:46,791 --> 00:49:49,625 You don't need help from a stranger. These are your best friends. 811 00:49:50,875 --> 00:49:56,125 I'm not sure that I believe in the whole, uh, marriage thing. 812 00:49:56,208 --> 00:49:58,500 Ah, so let me guess. 813 00:50:01,125 --> 00:50:03,041 Your parents are divorced. 814 00:50:03,125 --> 00:50:05,166 -Very, very astute. -Am I right? 815 00:50:05,250 --> 00:50:08,041 Yeah, they probably would be if my mom were still alive. 816 00:50:10,000 --> 00:50:11,541 I am so sorry. 817 00:50:11,625 --> 00:50:13,375 No, it's… I was little. 818 00:50:13,458 --> 00:50:16,125 -Sorry. I shouldn't have said that. -No, it's okay. It's really okay. 819 00:50:19,791 --> 00:50:21,250 You don't want a first line from me. 820 00:50:22,291 --> 00:50:26,583 I've been told that I suffer from a severe case of TMI. 821 00:50:26,666 --> 00:50:28,791 No great speech started with a filter. 822 00:50:31,458 --> 00:50:32,625 Um… 823 00:50:32,708 --> 00:50:34,125 What are their names? 824 00:50:34,208 --> 00:50:35,708 Breeda and Andy. 825 00:50:35,791 --> 00:50:37,583 -Breeda and Andy. -Mm-hm. 826 00:50:42,500 --> 00:50:44,500 "You have made a believer out of me." 827 00:50:46,166 --> 00:50:47,250 Holy shit. 828 00:50:47,333 --> 00:50:49,666 -See? I knew it. -Well, don't say it if it's not true. 829 00:50:49,750 --> 00:50:53,833 You don't wanna kick off their union in a bed of lies. 830 00:50:53,916 --> 00:50:57,000 -Cross my heart and hope to die. -Don't hope that. 831 00:50:57,958 --> 00:50:59,083 I won't. I-- 832 00:50:59,583 --> 00:51:01,041 I won't hope that. 833 00:51:01,125 --> 00:51:03,958 -Thank you. -So, uh, real estate, huh? 834 00:51:04,041 --> 00:51:06,625 -Yeah, yeah. -Do you have a fancy metal nameplate? 835 00:51:06,708 --> 00:51:09,875 -Why else would I be doing this? -Living the corporate daddy dream. 836 00:51:09,958 --> 00:51:13,750 Yeah, that's right. I mean, it has its perks. 837 00:51:14,583 --> 00:51:19,416 But, uh, I got my eye on something. I'm playing the long game. 838 00:51:19,500 --> 00:51:20,916 What kind of something? 839 00:51:21,000 --> 00:51:23,416 Let's just say, I keep my cards close. 840 00:51:23,916 --> 00:51:25,125 What about you? 841 00:51:25,208 --> 00:51:26,291 What's the dream? 842 00:51:26,375 --> 00:51:31,916 I'm living the "it's a good day if I'm not being publicly humiliated…" dream. 843 00:51:33,166 --> 00:51:38,541 -That can't be the dream! -Well, dreams are so short-sighted. 844 00:51:38,625 --> 00:51:42,250 When you're a little kid, you only know three jobs, right? 845 00:51:42,333 --> 00:51:46,333 There's, like, police officer, school teacher, and chef. 846 00:51:46,416 --> 00:51:49,166 -Mission accomplished. -Except no. 847 00:51:49,250 --> 00:51:50,958 I'm what they call a "prep cook." 848 00:51:51,500 --> 00:51:52,833 And as Chef says, 849 00:51:52,916 --> 00:51:59,208 we are barely one step above the janitorial staff and pedophiles. 850 00:51:59,291 --> 00:52:01,958 Sounds like you gotta take your prep cook skills elsewhere. 851 00:52:02,041 --> 00:52:05,083 -Mm. -Come on. If you build it, they will come. 852 00:52:05,166 --> 00:52:07,958 -Trust me, I'd love to start my own thing. -What's stopping you? 853 00:52:08,041 --> 00:52:11,083 I don't know, just any money at all, or brand reputation, 854 00:52:11,166 --> 00:52:12,833 business plan, house specialty. 855 00:52:12,916 --> 00:52:15,500 Oh, come on, you got a specialty. 856 00:52:15,583 --> 00:52:17,625 Even my mom had a specialty. 857 00:52:17,708 --> 00:52:20,625 -It was cornbread chicken pot pie. -Oh! 858 00:52:20,708 --> 00:52:24,333 A woman after my own heart. Do you know the recipe? 859 00:52:24,416 --> 00:52:25,583 No, I wish. 860 00:52:26,791 --> 00:52:28,333 It was legendary. 861 00:52:28,416 --> 00:52:30,458 I mean, people still talk about it. 862 00:52:32,916 --> 00:52:35,708 I wish I, uh… I wish I could remember. 863 00:52:37,375 --> 00:52:39,250 I'll bet your taste buds do. 864 00:52:42,958 --> 00:52:46,958 All right, the suspense is killing me. If you could put one thing on your menu, 865 00:52:48,125 --> 00:52:48,958 what would it be? 866 00:52:49,041 --> 00:52:53,166 You think I'm gonna share my culinary secrets with a stranger? 867 00:52:54,500 --> 00:52:56,958 I'll tell you what, I'm here for two weeks. 868 00:52:57,041 --> 00:52:59,291 Why don't we try to crack this SF nut together? 869 00:52:59,375 --> 00:53:00,875 As fellow Texas expats, 870 00:53:00,958 --> 00:53:04,875 I feel obligated to tell you that I am girl sober, 871 00:53:04,958 --> 00:53:06,875 so I will not make out with you. 872 00:53:06,958 --> 00:53:09,833 Even if you beg me, I won't do it. Scout's honor. 873 00:53:18,583 --> 00:53:22,666 Something about the day make me Wanna put it on the line, on the wire 874 00:53:22,750 --> 00:53:27,500 All you need to bring is yourself Company's all that I require 875 00:53:27,583 --> 00:53:31,416 I'm not naive for needing my baby 876 00:53:31,500 --> 00:53:35,500 So, today, come on over And play 'cause 877 00:53:35,583 --> 00:53:39,458 I've been patient 878 00:53:39,541 --> 00:53:44,750 I've been waiting For something like this 879 00:53:44,833 --> 00:53:46,791 Ooh-wee 880 00:53:47,583 --> 00:53:48,958 Like this 881 00:53:49,041 --> 00:53:53,083 -Ooh-wee -Waiting for something like this 882 00:53:53,166 --> 00:53:56,500 -Ooh-wee -Waiting for something like 883 00:53:56,583 --> 00:53:58,791 Baby, If you want me You know where to find me 884 00:53:58,875 --> 00:54:00,875 I'll be ready for you, babe 885 00:54:00,958 --> 00:54:04,500 Taste so sweet, it's like honey Dripping down my body, babe 886 00:54:04,583 --> 00:54:08,958 I know that this bitch love Drive you crazy 887 00:54:09,041 --> 00:54:13,208 So, today Won't you come out and play, 'cause 888 00:54:13,291 --> 00:54:17,041 I've been patient 889 00:54:17,125 --> 00:54:22,458 I've been waiting For something like this 890 00:54:22,541 --> 00:54:25,208 -Ooh-wee -Mmm 891 00:54:25,291 --> 00:54:26,500 Like this 892 00:54:26,583 --> 00:54:30,375 -Ooh-wee -Waiting for something like 893 00:54:30,458 --> 00:54:32,458 Ooh-wee 894 00:54:33,625 --> 00:54:35,125 Like this 895 00:54:40,000 --> 00:54:42,750 I don't know what happened, Chef. I rolled it out last night, 896 00:54:42,833 --> 00:54:44,041 and I put it in the fridge. 897 00:54:44,125 --> 00:54:45,250 Apparently not. 898 00:54:45,333 --> 00:54:47,500 -You've set us all back! -We could grate it. 899 00:54:48,333 --> 00:54:49,375 Whoa. 900 00:54:50,208 --> 00:54:51,125 Or… 901 00:54:52,708 --> 00:54:55,291 It's… I accidentally froze my butter in culinary school, 902 00:54:55,375 --> 00:54:58,791 and grating it made the dough even flakier. 903 00:54:58,875 --> 00:55:00,291 You're still talking? 904 00:55:00,375 --> 00:55:02,833 What is this? The Alpha Gamma prep girls? 905 00:55:04,791 --> 00:55:07,083 -Right? -Michelin-star joke, Chef. 906 00:55:07,166 --> 00:55:09,166 "It makes it extra flaky." 907 00:55:17,333 --> 00:55:18,375 Hey. 908 00:55:19,541 --> 00:55:21,208 I never asked for your help. 909 00:55:26,458 --> 00:55:27,458 I sold the spot. 910 00:55:27,541 --> 00:55:28,875 -You did? -Yeah. 911 00:55:28,958 --> 00:55:31,041 What a star! We have to celebrate. 912 00:55:31,125 --> 00:55:33,583 After you. How was your day? 913 00:55:33,666 --> 00:55:35,625 Uh… 914 00:55:35,708 --> 00:55:39,583 Chef Bastien was feeling particularly evil. 915 00:55:39,666 --> 00:55:41,083 He didn't use a single 'quat. 916 00:55:41,166 --> 00:55:43,875 He literally poured them out into the trash can 917 00:55:43,958 --> 00:55:46,125 while maintaining eye contact with me. 918 00:55:46,708 --> 00:55:49,750 It was kumquat carnage. 919 00:55:49,833 --> 00:55:51,000 He's hazing you, Jill. 920 00:55:53,958 --> 00:55:55,625 I don't know if I'm built for this. 921 00:55:56,208 --> 00:55:57,375 What, this Flâner gig? 922 00:55:57,458 --> 00:55:58,458 This… 923 00:55:59,666 --> 00:56:00,875 This dream. 924 00:56:02,625 --> 00:56:06,833 Ignore me and my existential dread. 925 00:56:08,458 --> 00:56:12,541 It's your last day, and I am ready to giggle. 926 00:56:14,291 --> 00:56:15,958 Welcome to Golden Gate Giggles. 927 00:56:16,958 --> 00:56:18,166 I'm your tour guide, Walter, 928 00:56:18,250 --> 00:56:23,000 and we're so glad you chose us, Golden Gate Giggles. 929 00:56:23,083 --> 00:56:24,875 How about a joke? 930 00:56:24,958 --> 00:56:26,041 Sure. 931 00:56:26,875 --> 00:56:28,291 Why did the hipster refuse… 932 00:56:31,958 --> 00:56:34,791 "Why did the hipster refuse to cross the Golden Gate Bridge?" 933 00:56:35,500 --> 00:56:36,500 Why? 934 00:56:36,583 --> 00:56:38,666 Because it was too mainstream. 935 00:56:38,750 --> 00:56:40,000 Pause for laughs. 936 00:56:42,125 --> 00:56:45,375 It's my first day today. 937 00:56:45,458 --> 00:56:49,166 -Crushing it, Walter. -Let's start out with some funny facts. 938 00:56:49,916 --> 00:56:50,958 Sure. 939 00:56:51,750 --> 00:56:52,708 Ha! 940 00:56:52,791 --> 00:56:56,958 San Francisco is where they invented blue jeans, 941 00:56:57,041 --> 00:56:58,208 and the electric… 942 00:56:58,833 --> 00:57:00,375 -I can't do this. -You're doing fine. 943 00:57:00,458 --> 00:57:02,083 -Just take a deep breath. -I quit. 944 00:57:02,166 --> 00:57:04,583 -You can't. We got 2 hours left. -Let me off! 945 00:57:04,666 --> 00:57:07,291 -Nope. Sit down and take a breath. -Open the door! 946 00:57:07,375 --> 00:57:09,125 -I need this job! -Open the door! 947 00:57:09,208 --> 00:57:11,750 -Let me off! -This is why I don't have kids. 948 00:57:11,833 --> 00:57:13,416 Let me off! 949 00:57:21,833 --> 00:57:24,791 Hey, boss. We paid for giggles. 950 00:57:24,875 --> 00:57:27,916 Not my department. 951 00:57:28,000 --> 00:57:29,500 We gonna get a refund? 952 00:57:34,791 --> 00:57:35,916 What are you doing? 953 00:57:36,416 --> 00:57:37,250 Uh… 954 00:57:38,833 --> 00:57:40,083 Uh, what's up, guys? 955 00:57:40,833 --> 00:57:42,041 I'm Wes. 956 00:57:42,125 --> 00:57:43,916 So, where's everybody from? 957 00:57:44,000 --> 00:57:46,625 Uh, other than New Jersey. 958 00:57:46,708 --> 00:57:48,458 Look, kid, you gotta sit down. Now. 959 00:57:48,541 --> 00:57:51,000 Uh, I know. I'm sorry. I just… We came for giggles, right? 960 00:57:51,083 --> 00:57:53,333 -Yeah. -Let's get some giggles in here. 961 00:57:53,416 --> 00:57:58,916 Uh, up ahead, we've got the world-famous… 962 00:57:59,541 --> 00:58:00,833 squiggle street. 963 00:58:04,458 --> 00:58:07,500 On your right, we have, uh, the house 964 00:58:07,583 --> 00:58:12,291 where Robin Williams brought a donkey into the party in Mrs. Doubtfire. 965 00:58:13,958 --> 00:58:16,666 Go to Fisherman's Wharf 966 00:58:16,750 --> 00:58:18,583 Top of the Mark 967 00:58:19,166 --> 00:58:20,541 Telegraph Hill 968 00:58:20,625 --> 00:58:22,208 Golden Gate Park 969 00:58:22,291 --> 00:58:27,000 Baby, baby, baby There's so much in this town… 970 00:58:27,083 --> 00:58:30,166 Out in the bay, you see it? That is Alcatraz, 971 00:58:30,250 --> 00:58:34,083 the famous prison that is known for hosting legendary criminals 972 00:58:34,166 --> 00:58:37,666 like Al Capone and, um, Sean Connery. 973 00:58:38,666 --> 00:58:42,125 Okay, look, child, you're gonna have to sit down now or I will kick you off. 974 00:58:42,208 --> 00:58:44,000 -Last thing. On your left… -Seriously? 975 00:58:44,083 --> 00:58:47,375 …is the delectable Flâner. I don't want to embarrass her, 976 00:58:47,458 --> 00:58:49,291 but we are actually in the presence 977 00:58:49,375 --> 00:58:53,083 of one of San Francisco's most talented up-and-coming chefs. 978 00:58:53,166 --> 00:58:57,541 She taught Chef Bastien everything he knows because she-- 979 00:58:58,041 --> 00:59:02,916 she is most definitely built for this. 980 00:59:03,666 --> 00:59:05,958 Okay, Romeo, show's over. 981 00:59:06,041 --> 00:59:08,833 -I'm going. I just have one more thing. -I know you are. No, you don't. 982 00:59:08,916 --> 00:59:12,333 -Let's go. And you're done. -I left my heart 983 00:59:12,416 --> 00:59:15,333 -Off! Uh-huh. All right. -In San Francisco 984 00:59:15,416 --> 00:59:16,416 I just need to finish! 985 00:59:16,500 --> 00:59:18,541 -High on a hill -Dude! 986 00:59:18,625 --> 00:59:22,291 She calls to me 987 00:59:22,375 --> 00:59:25,750 -Let go! -When I come home to you 988 00:59:25,833 --> 00:59:30,000 -All right. Fine. -San Francisco! 989 00:59:30,083 --> 00:59:34,041 Your golden sun 990 00:59:34,125 --> 00:59:36,583 Will shine 991 00:59:36,666 --> 00:59:40,875 For me 992 01:00:03,708 --> 01:00:06,583 I guess the scouts have no honor, huh? 993 01:00:06,666 --> 01:00:08,458 It's a good thing I wasn't a Boy Scout. 994 01:00:10,791 --> 01:00:12,291 Yeah, all right! 995 01:00:14,916 --> 01:00:16,208 Ah, ta-da! 996 01:00:16,291 --> 01:00:19,333 Blue crab and corn fritters with smoked jalapeño aioli. 997 01:00:19,416 --> 01:00:21,166 -Wow. -Voilà! 998 01:00:21,250 --> 01:00:23,041 -This is insane. -Yay. 999 01:00:26,958 --> 01:00:28,250 -What? -Is it good? 1000 01:00:28,333 --> 01:00:30,750 Are you kidding me? Chef Bastien is an idiot. 1001 01:00:30,833 --> 01:00:32,291 He is sitting on a gold mine. 1002 01:00:32,375 --> 01:00:34,125 How did you even learn how to do this? 1003 01:00:35,666 --> 01:00:37,000 Um… 1004 01:00:40,708 --> 01:00:42,791 My sister was stuck at home a lot as a kid. 1005 01:00:44,791 --> 01:00:46,625 She was really sick. 1006 01:00:46,708 --> 01:00:50,541 And the kitchen was our happy place. 1007 01:00:51,041 --> 01:00:53,208 We were like two little mad scientists. 1008 01:00:54,875 --> 01:00:57,791 We always thought we were on the verge of discovering something 1009 01:00:57,875 --> 01:00:59,500 the world had never seen. 1010 01:01:02,916 --> 01:01:05,625 Either way I lose 1011 01:01:09,750 --> 01:01:11,750 Though I know… 1012 01:01:13,458 --> 01:01:14,625 My sister… 1013 01:01:15,583 --> 01:01:16,916 Isabelle, she died. 1014 01:01:17,791 --> 01:01:20,875 In November. She had cystic fibrosis. 1015 01:01:22,458 --> 01:01:23,666 I'm so sorry, Jill. 1016 01:01:23,750 --> 01:01:26,125 She was just the love of my life. No big. 1017 01:01:27,541 --> 01:01:29,875 -I bet she's proud of you. -Uh… 1018 01:01:32,125 --> 01:01:36,166 I was much cooler as a kid. I peaked at like 12. 1019 01:01:37,916 --> 01:01:41,666 I would do the craziest shit just to come home with a story for her. 1020 01:01:41,750 --> 01:01:43,458 I would've tried crack if it made her laugh. 1021 01:01:44,041 --> 01:01:48,166 And now, I think I might be a little bit dead inside. 1022 01:01:48,250 --> 01:01:49,083 Jill… 1023 01:01:52,833 --> 01:01:54,958 you couldn't be less dead inside. 1024 01:01:56,666 --> 01:01:57,833 What you need to do 1025 01:01:57,916 --> 01:01:59,708 is you need to get out there 1026 01:02:00,291 --> 01:02:01,208 and try crack. 1027 01:02:04,291 --> 01:02:05,291 Come with me… 1028 01:02:07,166 --> 01:02:08,708 to Breeda and Andy's wedding. 1029 01:02:10,000 --> 01:02:10,916 Hm. 1030 01:02:12,541 --> 01:02:14,208 Okay. 1031 01:02:14,833 --> 01:02:16,666 I'll ask my overlord. 1032 01:02:19,416 --> 01:02:20,416 All right. 1033 01:02:21,791 --> 01:02:23,000 Ready for the main course? 1034 01:02:23,083 --> 01:02:24,166 There's more? 1035 01:02:25,541 --> 01:02:28,333 -I… This was already so impressive. -Come on! 1036 01:02:28,416 --> 01:02:30,291 How could you make more? I don't even… 1037 01:02:30,375 --> 01:02:31,875 -Shut up. -You can't top this. 1038 01:02:35,083 --> 01:02:36,083 Okay. 1039 01:02:39,625 --> 01:02:42,833 Either way I lose… 1040 01:02:44,291 --> 01:02:45,833 Is that chicken pot pie? 1041 01:02:45,916 --> 01:02:47,708 With cornbread crust. 1042 01:02:49,750 --> 01:02:51,000 You made this for me? 1043 01:02:51,083 --> 01:02:53,750 Yeah. I mean, I have no idea if it's anything like your mom's. 1044 01:02:53,833 --> 01:02:56,916 It was a full-blown experiment, but we will see. 1045 01:02:57,583 --> 01:02:58,583 All right. 1046 01:03:25,291 --> 01:03:26,583 Uh… 1047 01:03:28,250 --> 01:03:32,291 I'm gonna go… Just… I'm gonna prep dessert, okay? 1048 01:03:58,541 --> 01:04:00,791 Believe it 1049 01:04:00,875 --> 01:04:05,041 I need you by my side 1050 01:04:05,541 --> 01:04:07,875 Yes, I know you know 1051 01:04:07,958 --> 01:04:12,250 Know you know Know I've been a sinner, baby 1052 01:04:12,333 --> 01:04:14,625 I've seen it 1053 01:04:14,708 --> 01:04:18,791 I've seen you high and dry 1054 01:04:19,708 --> 01:04:21,791 Yes, I know you don't 1055 01:04:21,875 --> 01:04:27,750 Know you don't Know you don't need me to say it 1056 01:04:27,833 --> 01:04:30,958 But if anything happens between us Does everything change? 1057 01:04:32,333 --> 01:04:37,208 I know you feel it too I can see it in your face 1058 01:04:37,291 --> 01:04:41,458 So tell me now not to get too close 1059 01:04:42,750 --> 01:04:43,958 'Cause it always happens 1060 01:04:44,041 --> 01:04:46,541 One, two, three, four 1061 01:04:46,625 --> 01:04:49,291 How much longer can this go? 1062 01:04:49,375 --> 01:04:51,125 Oh, babe, don't break 1063 01:04:51,208 --> 01:04:53,791 Every single breath you take 1064 01:04:53,875 --> 01:04:57,958 Kills me softly, chills my body 1065 01:04:58,041 --> 01:04:59,833 But when we reach the limit 1066 01:05:01,458 --> 01:05:02,416 -Sorry. -No. Sorry. 1067 01:05:02,500 --> 01:05:04,333 -Yeah… I just have to go to the bathroom. -Okay. 1068 01:05:05,333 --> 01:05:06,250 All right. You okay? 1069 01:05:06,333 --> 01:05:07,166 -Yep. -Okay. 1070 01:05:07,250 --> 01:05:08,708 -Sorry. Uh… -Oh, no. Okay. 1071 01:05:10,750 --> 01:05:11,708 Okay. 1072 01:05:13,916 --> 01:05:15,833 Just say it. Just say the words. 1073 01:05:15,916 --> 01:05:17,291 Just say it. 1074 01:05:17,375 --> 01:05:19,541 Jill. Hey, Jill. I've been… 1075 01:05:20,416 --> 01:05:23,000 I've been getting your voicemails. I've been getting… 1076 01:05:25,208 --> 01:05:26,250 Oh, shit. 1077 01:05:26,333 --> 01:05:27,750 Oh, shit. 1078 01:05:46,333 --> 01:05:47,333 Jill. 1079 01:05:48,750 --> 01:05:49,791 Uh… 1080 01:05:52,916 --> 01:05:54,125 I, um… 1081 01:05:58,958 --> 01:06:00,000 No, it's okay. 1082 01:06:01,041 --> 01:06:02,250 It's totally okay. 1083 01:06:03,500 --> 01:06:04,500 Um… 1084 01:06:06,333 --> 01:06:08,041 Want to just watch Top Chef? 1085 01:06:08,833 --> 01:06:12,708 I took a date-based ganache. I shaped it into a small sphere, 1086 01:06:12,791 --> 01:06:15,833 and I coated it in a cocoa-infused beignet dough before… 1087 01:06:15,916 --> 01:06:18,083 Jill, I've been getting your voicemails. 1088 01:06:18,625 --> 01:06:20,875 I like the surprise in the middle. It's nice. 1089 01:06:20,958 --> 01:06:23,500 I went with a bombolone-style donut. 1090 01:06:23,583 --> 01:06:26,666 I worked in fresh orange and lemon zest, fried it off, 1091 01:06:26,750 --> 01:06:29,500 and finished it with a passionfruit cream filling. 1092 01:06:29,583 --> 01:06:31,166 The texture's great. 1093 01:06:31,250 --> 01:06:32,750 Heaven help me 1094 01:06:32,833 --> 01:06:38,000 My mind changes like the wind 1095 01:06:40,041 --> 01:06:42,250 Please excuse me 1096 01:06:42,333 --> 01:06:47,750 I don't know where to begin 1097 01:06:47,833 --> 01:06:51,666 But I didn't think I cared 1098 01:06:51,750 --> 01:06:54,041 I could be your friend 1099 01:06:54,125 --> 01:06:58,750 But I'm unprepared Oh, I've never felt like this 1100 01:06:58,833 --> 01:07:01,041 I was unaware 1101 01:07:01,125 --> 01:07:03,500 That you were lighting flares 1102 01:07:03,583 --> 01:07:08,375 Now I'm running scared Oh, how did it come to this? 1103 01:07:08,458 --> 01:07:15,458 You know I've never Been so lonely on my own 1104 01:07:16,041 --> 01:07:17,916 And it shows 1105 01:07:18,000 --> 01:07:22,791 'Cause I don't see you like I used to 1106 01:07:23,958 --> 01:07:26,500 Now I'm going back On the things that I know 1107 01:07:26,583 --> 01:07:32,750 Oh, all my nights taste like gold 1108 01:07:32,833 --> 01:07:37,000 Yeah, when I'm with you It's like everything glows 1109 01:07:37,083 --> 01:07:42,083 And all my days, we can lay low 1110 01:07:42,166 --> 01:07:46,625 Yeah, when we're waking up We're waking up slow 1111 01:07:51,083 --> 01:07:52,791 Dessert tacos. 1112 01:07:53,625 --> 01:07:54,875 Dessert tacos? 1113 01:07:55,375 --> 01:07:58,166 When Izzy was super sick, they tried to get her to eat, 1114 01:07:58,250 --> 01:08:00,666 and she'd throw everything up except her favorite. 1115 01:08:01,583 --> 01:08:06,500 Dessert tacos. And that is my specialty. 1116 01:08:12,666 --> 01:08:13,958 Magic: The Gathering. 1117 01:08:14,666 --> 01:08:15,833 The card game? 1118 01:08:17,666 --> 01:08:20,125 Actually, they're not just cards. They're actually collectible. 1119 01:08:20,208 --> 01:08:21,583 They're really valuable. 1120 01:08:21,666 --> 01:08:24,250 But, um, my mom, uh… 1121 01:08:24,916 --> 01:08:26,875 she would buy them for me, 1122 01:08:26,958 --> 01:08:29,708 and she bought me my first pack, and… 1123 01:08:30,791 --> 01:08:34,583 I just need the Alpha Black Lotus to complete the Power Nine. 1124 01:08:34,666 --> 01:08:37,208 It's one of the rarest cards in the world. 1125 01:08:37,291 --> 01:08:40,000 That's what I've been… working towards. 1126 01:08:40,083 --> 01:08:41,000 Wow. 1127 01:08:41,083 --> 01:08:44,500 And I think I may have found one on eBay. 1128 01:08:44,583 --> 01:08:45,833 -Really? -Yeah. 1129 01:08:45,916 --> 01:08:46,916 So… 1130 01:08:47,500 --> 01:08:50,875 I gotta confess, I was actually gonna ghost you 1131 01:08:50,958 --> 01:08:54,250 for not having the full… Power Nine. 1132 01:08:54,333 --> 01:08:55,708 So now I don't have to. 1133 01:08:55,791 --> 01:08:57,208 -Yeah. -Yeah. 1134 01:08:57,291 --> 01:08:59,791 Okay, wow. Still in the game. 1135 01:09:01,000 --> 01:09:02,250 Still in the game. 1136 01:09:03,875 --> 01:09:05,000 I'll see you at home. 1137 01:09:05,083 --> 01:09:05,958 Yeah. 1138 01:09:06,500 --> 01:09:07,541 Safe flight. 1139 01:09:08,458 --> 01:09:09,291 Thanks. 1140 01:09:30,375 --> 01:09:32,666 Last breath of freedom till you're chained for life. 1141 01:09:32,750 --> 01:09:34,666 -Hey! -Yay! 1142 01:09:36,583 --> 01:09:38,541 Oh! We are excited to meet Jill. 1143 01:09:38,625 --> 01:09:40,250 Yeah, we are. 1144 01:09:41,750 --> 01:09:43,083 Oh, no. 1145 01:09:43,166 --> 01:09:44,083 I knew it. 1146 01:09:44,166 --> 01:09:45,250 What happened, Wes? 1147 01:09:45,333 --> 01:09:47,083 Nothing. Nothing. 1148 01:09:47,791 --> 01:09:49,791 We're just hanging out. 1149 01:09:49,875 --> 01:09:54,333 All right, I admit that things have gotten a little intense. 1150 01:09:54,416 --> 01:09:58,458 Intense? You're the one that flew to another city for this girl. 1151 01:09:58,541 --> 01:10:00,708 No, I flew to another city for work. 1152 01:10:00,791 --> 01:10:03,041 -Oh, for work. -Oh, yes, of course. 1153 01:10:03,125 --> 01:10:04,583 -It was a work trip. -Work trip, and-- 1154 01:10:04,666 --> 01:10:07,083 All I'm saying is once in a while, Wes, 1155 01:10:07,166 --> 01:10:10,583 someone comes along that changes the whole game. 1156 01:10:10,666 --> 01:10:13,916 Yeah, don't be so busy scoring that you miss it. 1157 01:10:15,083 --> 01:10:16,791 Wow. 1158 01:10:16,875 --> 01:10:19,250 -That was good. So good. -That was nice. 1159 01:10:19,333 --> 01:10:21,500 -Copyright that. -Every single time. 1160 01:10:21,583 --> 01:10:25,458 Wait a minute. Wait. You didn't tell us what happened with the voicemails. 1161 01:10:27,875 --> 01:10:29,666 -You didn't tell her? -O.M. God. 1162 01:10:29,750 --> 01:10:30,583 I'm going to. 1163 01:10:30,666 --> 01:10:31,958 -Liar, liar! -Guys, look. 1164 01:10:32,041 --> 01:10:35,458 Oh, my God, this is like a sick reboot of You've Got Mail. 1165 01:10:35,541 --> 01:10:37,375 Tom Hanks is America's sweetheart! 1166 01:10:37,458 --> 01:10:39,541 You are not Tom Hanks! 1167 01:10:40,041 --> 01:10:41,166 I might slap him. 1168 01:10:41,250 --> 01:10:42,833 -Violence is never-- -Slap him. 1169 01:10:42,916 --> 01:10:45,500 -Hey! Hey! -Wes, tell her the truth. 1170 01:10:45,583 --> 01:10:47,458 -I'm going to. -Okay? Yes. 1171 01:10:47,541 --> 01:10:51,458 -Tell her the truth, Wes. -I will! In person. 1172 01:10:51,541 --> 01:10:52,958 I swear on my mom. 1173 01:10:56,708 --> 01:10:59,000 -Well, now we can't say anything. -Yeah. 1174 01:11:18,000 --> 01:11:21,125 I don't wanna see you smile 1175 01:11:21,208 --> 01:11:24,041 I want you in the morning 1176 01:11:24,125 --> 01:11:27,375 Before you go performing 1177 01:11:29,500 --> 01:11:32,791 Tell me something I don't know 1178 01:11:32,875 --> 01:11:38,583 And lead me to the place Where no one ever goes 1179 01:11:40,791 --> 01:11:43,708 You know you're beautiful 1180 01:11:43,791 --> 01:11:46,375 But that ain't half the gold treasure In your soul 1181 01:11:46,458 --> 01:11:49,291 What you got? 'Cause I want it all 1182 01:11:49,375 --> 01:11:51,875 With your fingers in my mouth I fail to see your faults 1183 01:11:51,958 --> 01:11:54,833 So please don't let me fall 1184 01:11:54,916 --> 01:11:59,583 So please don't let me fall 1185 01:11:59,666 --> 01:12:02,958 Don't let me fall 1186 01:12:03,041 --> 01:12:05,666 Don't let me fall 1187 01:12:05,750 --> 01:12:08,458 Don't let me fall 1188 01:12:08,541 --> 01:12:11,583 Don't let me fall 1189 01:12:13,291 --> 01:12:15,291 Good evening, everyone. I'm Wes. 1190 01:12:18,958 --> 01:12:21,583 Andy's younger, dreamier cousin. 1191 01:12:21,666 --> 01:12:23,125 -Lies. -If not by blood. 1192 01:12:23,208 --> 01:12:24,875 Our mothers were best friends. 1193 01:12:25,708 --> 01:12:28,708 And Breeda is the older sister that I never had. 1194 01:12:28,791 --> 01:12:29,958 Aww. 1195 01:12:30,041 --> 01:12:35,041 So I tried to warn 'em both that marriage is Russian roulette, okay? 1196 01:12:35,125 --> 01:12:38,041 -Should we go over the divorce rate? -No. 1197 01:12:38,791 --> 01:12:43,666 Okay, suffice it to say, I wouldn't consider myself a romantic. 1198 01:12:43,750 --> 01:12:44,791 Aw. 1199 01:12:50,333 --> 01:12:51,708 But, um… 1200 01:12:53,208 --> 01:12:57,791 did you know that these two weren't even supposed to meet? 1201 01:12:57,875 --> 01:13:00,125 Andy's alarm randomly didn't go off. 1202 01:13:00,208 --> 01:13:04,083 This man has never been late to anything in his entire life. 1203 01:13:04,166 --> 01:13:07,416 And he missed his dentist appointment. And he loves the dentist. 1204 01:13:09,166 --> 01:13:10,000 -It's true. -I do. 1205 01:13:10,083 --> 01:13:13,833 They made him wait for an hour, and he was about to walk out, 1206 01:13:14,583 --> 01:13:15,875 when Breeda walked in. 1207 01:13:15,958 --> 01:13:17,083 Aww. 1208 01:13:17,166 --> 01:13:19,833 If that alarm had gone off when it was supposed to, 1209 01:13:20,791 --> 01:13:24,041 these two would never have met, and we would not be here tonight. 1210 01:13:26,166 --> 01:13:28,541 I don't know about gambling on forever, 1211 01:13:30,208 --> 01:13:31,583 but I do know this. 1212 01:13:32,083 --> 01:13:33,791 You're proof 1213 01:13:34,583 --> 01:13:36,250 that sometimes 1214 01:13:37,916 --> 01:13:39,875 life rigs things in our favor. 1215 01:13:47,666 --> 01:13:48,708 To Breeda and Andy. 1216 01:13:48,791 --> 01:13:50,416 Yeah! 1217 01:13:53,041 --> 01:13:54,416 You made a believer out of me. 1218 01:13:59,166 --> 01:14:02,916 -I am so proud of you. -Couldn't have done it without you, coach. 1219 01:14:03,000 --> 01:14:04,208 That was beautiful. 1220 01:14:04,291 --> 01:14:06,375 -Your hands are so cold. -I know. 1221 01:14:06,458 --> 01:14:08,583 What? 1222 01:14:08,666 --> 01:14:10,041 Wait, let's warm you up. 1223 01:14:10,125 --> 01:14:11,083 Jeez. 1224 01:14:14,000 --> 01:14:14,916 Thanks. 1225 01:14:15,458 --> 01:14:17,583 -Can I top you off? -Yes, please. 1226 01:14:19,166 --> 01:14:20,000 Thanks. 1227 01:14:21,958 --> 01:14:23,583 -There she is. -Oh, my God! Jill! 1228 01:14:23,666 --> 01:14:25,458 Oh, wow. I am so starstruck. 1229 01:14:25,541 --> 01:14:27,125 Oh, my God! 1230 01:14:27,208 --> 01:14:29,833 We can ride the storm… 1231 01:14:29,916 --> 01:14:32,625 Can I get one more and a whiskey on the rocks? 1232 01:14:32,708 --> 01:14:35,083 -Yes. -Thank you for being here. You're so cute. 1233 01:14:35,166 --> 01:14:37,416 -Congrats! -Enjoy. Thank you! 1234 01:14:39,041 --> 01:14:41,375 -Oh, my God. -Look who decided to show up! 1235 01:14:46,875 --> 01:14:52,375 We can make it through it all 1236 01:14:53,541 --> 01:14:57,375 Go and show us what we really are 1237 01:15:13,250 --> 01:15:15,458 -Oh, my God, are you okay? -I'm so sorry. 1238 01:15:15,541 --> 01:15:16,958 -Are you all right? -Sorry. 1239 01:15:17,791 --> 01:15:20,000 Jill! Hey, Jill! Jill, wait! 1240 01:15:20,083 --> 01:15:23,041 Why is my sister's number connected to your phone, Wes? 1241 01:15:24,166 --> 01:15:26,333 Okay, it's-- It's a crazy story. 1242 01:15:26,416 --> 01:15:28,291 I… I got a work phone, 1243 01:15:28,375 --> 01:15:30,875 and then I inherited your sister's phone number. 1244 01:15:30,958 --> 01:15:33,291 -What are you talking about? How? -After she died. 1245 01:15:34,208 --> 01:15:36,000 But my sister died in November. 1246 01:15:41,708 --> 01:15:43,791 So, you've been getting my… 1247 01:15:45,541 --> 01:15:47,583 voicemails this entire time? 1248 01:15:48,083 --> 01:15:52,375 I was going to tell you. I just… Things kept happening. 1249 01:15:52,458 --> 01:15:53,791 -And I-- -What did you hear? 1250 01:15:56,708 --> 01:15:58,125 Wes, what did you hear? 1251 01:16:04,708 --> 01:16:05,916 My bench? 1252 01:16:06,458 --> 01:16:08,750 You knew that I was gonna be at my bench. 1253 01:16:08,833 --> 01:16:11,000 You knew about José's, about my fantasy. 1254 01:16:11,083 --> 01:16:13,375 You knew about my sister. You knew everything? 1255 01:16:13,916 --> 01:16:15,125 You knew everything. 1256 01:16:16,416 --> 01:16:18,958 -Oh, my God, I'm gonna die. -Just… Jill. 1257 01:16:19,041 --> 01:16:20,500 -No. I knew it. -Jill. 1258 01:16:20,583 --> 01:16:23,458 -Hold on. -I knew that this was too good to be true. 1259 01:16:23,541 --> 01:16:25,833 -No, Jill. -It was too perfect, I was too happy. 1260 01:16:25,916 --> 01:16:28,916 And I'm not-- I'm not that lucky. 1261 01:16:29,000 --> 01:16:30,958 -I was gonna tell you. -Take this. 1262 01:16:31,041 --> 01:16:32,791 I promise. I… 1263 01:16:33,625 --> 01:16:35,833 I know how much you loved Isabelle, and-- 1264 01:16:35,916 --> 01:16:38,041 No, you do not! 1265 01:16:40,208 --> 01:16:42,500 You wouldn't know anything about that. 1266 01:16:48,583 --> 01:16:49,791 You're right. 1267 01:16:53,416 --> 01:16:54,416 I don't. 1268 01:16:55,750 --> 01:16:58,791 You deserve someone that can love you like that, and… 1269 01:17:00,166 --> 01:17:01,291 I don't know how. 1270 01:17:06,291 --> 01:17:07,625 That's crazy. 1271 01:17:09,416 --> 01:17:12,125 So you heard all my voicemails, 1272 01:17:12,875 --> 01:17:14,750 and you still don't get it. 1273 01:17:16,791 --> 01:17:21,083 Those voicemails are not a plea to the universe, 1274 01:17:21,166 --> 01:17:24,333 "God, send me somebody to love me!" 1275 01:17:28,875 --> 01:17:30,625 I don't need a man. 1276 01:17:37,000 --> 01:17:39,416 What I need is my little sister back. 1277 01:18:12,791 --> 01:18:13,750 Wait. 1278 01:18:15,000 --> 01:18:16,666 No, no, no, no. 1279 01:18:18,791 --> 01:18:19,875 No, that's… 1280 01:18:29,875 --> 01:18:31,500 Please, no! 1281 01:19:00,291 --> 01:19:02,000 Mettez-vous en rang! 1282 01:19:02,083 --> 01:19:03,416 Line up! 1283 01:19:08,833 --> 01:19:09,875 Prep piggies. 1284 01:19:10,666 --> 01:19:11,833 Yes, Chef! 1285 01:19:11,916 --> 01:19:14,625 The time has come to see which of you, 1286 01:19:14,708 --> 01:19:15,750 if any, 1287 01:19:16,583 --> 01:19:19,583 has what it takes to bake. 1288 01:19:25,416 --> 01:19:26,791 Le soufflé. 1289 01:19:26,875 --> 01:19:29,541 -I just have a quick question-- -Begin! 1290 01:19:41,291 --> 01:19:44,166 Vingt et une minutes. "Twenty-one minutes." 1291 01:19:47,375 --> 01:19:48,416 Fuck you. 1292 01:19:55,958 --> 01:19:57,333 Quatorze minutes. 1293 01:19:57,916 --> 01:19:59,166 "Fourteen minutes." 1294 01:20:15,500 --> 01:20:16,375 No. 1295 01:20:16,458 --> 01:20:19,375 Help me, brother. Pears, plums. Dragon fruit with chocolate? 1296 01:20:19,458 --> 01:20:21,916 Chocolate crème? That's boring. What would you do? 1297 01:20:23,041 --> 01:20:24,625 What would you do? 1298 01:20:42,416 --> 01:20:43,458 Fruit… 1299 01:20:44,458 --> 01:20:45,583 of the gods. 1300 01:20:48,125 --> 01:20:50,958 Pistache. Pistache and… 1301 01:20:52,958 --> 01:20:53,875 Raspberry coulis. 1302 01:20:57,541 --> 01:20:58,583 Oh, my God, that's perfect. 1303 01:21:00,458 --> 01:21:01,333 Oh! 1304 01:21:01,916 --> 01:21:04,541 Oh, so sorry. I didn't hear you say "corner," 1305 01:21:05,041 --> 01:21:06,458 Kumquat. 1306 01:21:16,083 --> 01:21:17,000 Okay. 1307 01:21:17,750 --> 01:21:18,750 Oh! 1308 01:21:21,791 --> 01:21:23,750 To you they crawl, body sprawl… 1309 01:21:23,833 --> 01:21:24,916 One minute. 1310 01:21:25,000 --> 01:21:27,833 Close call, stand tall Doll, you make them feel so small 1311 01:21:27,916 --> 01:21:29,708 What in the world are you doing? 1312 01:21:31,958 --> 01:21:36,250 And three, two, one. 1313 01:21:36,333 --> 01:21:37,833 Time! 1314 01:21:37,916 --> 01:21:40,250 Very good. Très bien. 1315 01:21:43,041 --> 01:21:45,041 Le moment de vérité. 1316 01:21:45,125 --> 01:21:46,375 "The moment of truth." 1317 01:21:52,541 --> 01:21:53,541 Hm. 1318 01:21:55,291 --> 01:21:58,000 It's everything you've ever taught me, Chef. 1319 01:22:00,250 --> 01:22:01,666 Enjoy. 1320 01:22:01,750 --> 01:22:04,500 -You do me great honor. -Thank you, Chef. 1321 01:22:12,333 --> 01:22:13,583 Yes. 1322 01:22:13,666 --> 01:22:17,208 Soufflé pancakes with flambé kumquats, 1323 01:22:17,291 --> 01:22:21,916 cream chantilly, and ground pistachios, Chef. 1324 01:22:46,708 --> 01:22:50,666 Being a baker is about precision. 1325 01:22:50,750 --> 01:22:52,166 Consistency. 1326 01:22:52,250 --> 01:22:58,583 Being a baker is not about desperate, frantic experimentation. 1327 01:23:02,458 --> 01:23:04,625 Congratulations, young man. 1328 01:23:04,708 --> 01:23:07,291 Me? 1329 01:23:07,375 --> 01:23:09,250 Me? What? 1330 01:23:12,791 --> 01:23:14,083 Yes! 1331 01:23:15,000 --> 01:23:16,041 Yeah! 1332 01:23:20,291 --> 01:23:22,583 This is a joke, right? 1333 01:23:22,666 --> 01:23:25,541 This is a funny little ha-ha, little hee-hee joke, no? 1334 01:23:25,625 --> 01:23:27,458 -No. -You barely tasted that. 1335 01:23:27,541 --> 01:23:30,958 And why might that be? 1336 01:23:31,041 --> 01:23:33,208 Maybe because… 1337 01:23:33,291 --> 01:23:35,166 Uh… no. 1338 01:23:35,958 --> 01:23:37,875 It's raw? 1339 01:23:39,000 --> 01:23:42,000 But you knew that, didn't you? 1340 01:23:42,083 --> 01:23:46,166 Did you also know that while you're busy out there, 1341 01:23:46,250 --> 01:23:49,416 pretending to be Timothée Chalamet, 1342 01:23:49,500 --> 01:23:54,125 he's been sticking pubes in tarts and butter in freezers? 1343 01:23:54,208 --> 01:23:56,791 And you know what? Did you ever consider 1344 01:23:56,875 --> 01:24:01,833 that the girl with the dead sister might be the one who wants to cry during sex?! 1345 01:24:02,416 --> 01:24:04,958 So, sugar tits, look at me. 1346 01:24:05,041 --> 01:24:10,083 I did not leave my home and my beautiful family 1347 01:24:10,166 --> 01:24:14,791 to waste this one wild and precious life 1348 01:24:14,875 --> 01:24:19,250 working for the goddamn Temu Gordon Ramsay. 1349 01:24:19,333 --> 01:24:20,416 You finished… 1350 01:24:23,541 --> 01:24:25,666 fourth on Top Chef! 1351 01:24:25,750 --> 01:24:26,916 It was third! 1352 01:24:27,000 --> 01:24:29,333 And you can drop the bad Lumière impression 1353 01:24:29,416 --> 01:24:33,916 because we all know that you're from Wisconsin. 1354 01:24:34,000 --> 01:24:35,416 And that your name… 1355 01:24:35,500 --> 01:24:36,375 No! 1356 01:24:36,458 --> 01:24:38,333 …is Gilbert! 1357 01:24:38,416 --> 01:24:40,041 It's actually Gilbert. 1358 01:24:40,125 --> 01:24:41,708 Who's coming with me? 1359 01:24:41,791 --> 01:24:43,666 Who's coming with me? 1360 01:25:03,458 --> 01:25:06,916 Happy birthday to me 1361 01:25:22,958 --> 01:25:25,041 Surprise! 1362 01:25:25,125 --> 01:25:26,041 Oh, my God. 1363 01:25:26,125 --> 01:25:28,500 I went full Jilly Maguire. 1364 01:25:28,583 --> 01:25:30,500 You told 'em to come with you, didn't you? 1365 01:25:30,583 --> 01:25:32,333 Yeah. Yeah, I did. 1366 01:25:32,416 --> 01:25:34,000 No one came with you, did they? 1367 01:25:34,083 --> 01:25:36,791 No. No, they did not. 1368 01:25:36,875 --> 01:25:38,125 Cowards. 1369 01:25:38,208 --> 01:25:41,833 Not really. Where are they supposed to come to? 1370 01:25:42,416 --> 01:25:44,250 I have nothing built. 1371 01:25:44,875 --> 01:25:46,916 I have nothing to offer anyone. 1372 01:25:47,000 --> 01:25:49,250 Maybe this isn't who I am anymore. 1373 01:25:49,333 --> 01:25:52,541 And I just need to accept it. I need to grow up. 1374 01:25:53,458 --> 01:25:56,083 It's time to grow up. It's time to get a job in accounting. 1375 01:25:56,166 --> 01:25:58,458 -Honey, you're not good at math. -So bad. 1376 01:25:58,541 --> 01:26:00,125 Maybe I'm good now. 1377 01:26:00,708 --> 01:26:03,125 I haven't counted in a long time. 1378 01:26:03,208 --> 01:26:04,500 Okay. Um… 1379 01:26:05,000 --> 01:26:08,416 We, uh, got something for you. 1380 01:26:10,291 --> 01:26:12,250 We found it in the garage. 1381 01:26:25,583 --> 01:26:27,875 I feel like I'm letting her down. 1382 01:26:27,958 --> 01:26:29,125 Honey. 1383 01:26:30,166 --> 01:26:32,291 You are her hero. 1384 01:26:34,000 --> 01:26:36,041 Maybe her hero just wants to go back home. 1385 01:26:36,125 --> 01:26:38,708 Well, then your home will be waiting for you. 1386 01:26:39,208 --> 01:26:40,291 Always. 1387 01:26:40,375 --> 01:26:43,875 Sweetheart, there's, uh, something else in there. 1388 01:26:58,916 --> 01:27:00,041 What? 1389 01:27:00,125 --> 01:27:01,791 What is-- What is this? 1390 01:27:01,875 --> 01:27:04,000 Izzy's college fund. 1391 01:27:04,083 --> 01:27:05,791 No, I'm not… I can't take that. 1392 01:27:05,875 --> 01:27:08,375 It's not much, but we know she'd want you to have it. 1393 01:27:10,333 --> 01:27:13,750 You could use it to come back home, get a new apartment, 1394 01:27:14,291 --> 01:27:16,083 maybe a job in accounting. 1395 01:27:16,666 --> 01:27:21,375 Or you could use it to give 'em hell. 1396 01:27:21,458 --> 01:27:22,875 What would Izzy say? 1397 01:27:26,750 --> 01:27:31,291 Yeah, yeah, yeah 1398 01:27:41,041 --> 01:27:45,583 Always been Told that I've got too much pride 1399 01:27:45,666 --> 01:27:50,375 Too independent to have you by my side 1400 01:27:50,458 --> 01:27:53,166 But my heart said 1401 01:27:53,250 --> 01:27:56,500 -No. -All of you will see 1402 01:27:56,583 --> 01:27:58,500 Just won't live for someone 1403 01:27:58,583 --> 01:28:00,750 -Until he lives for me -I suck. 1404 01:28:01,833 --> 01:28:03,375 Well, now I've found you 1405 01:28:03,458 --> 01:28:06,958 And I'll tell you no lie 1406 01:28:07,041 --> 01:28:09,958 This love I've got for you… 1407 01:28:10,041 --> 01:28:11,041 Oh, my God. 1408 01:28:11,125 --> 01:28:14,041 -Now show me love -Show me love 1409 01:28:14,958 --> 01:28:16,791 Show me life 1410 01:28:17,541 --> 01:28:22,000 Baby, show me what it's all about 1411 01:28:23,041 --> 01:28:27,791 You're the one that I ever needed 1412 01:28:27,875 --> 01:28:32,083 Show me love and what it's all about 1413 01:28:32,166 --> 01:28:33,333 All right 1414 01:28:33,416 --> 01:28:37,625 Show me love, show me life 1415 01:28:37,708 --> 01:28:38,625 All right 1416 01:28:38,708 --> 01:28:42,791 Show me love and what it's all about 1417 01:28:42,875 --> 01:28:44,291 All right 1418 01:28:49,333 --> 01:28:52,083 Hi, sir. Are you interested in trying one of… 1419 01:28:52,791 --> 01:28:54,166 Hi. 1420 01:29:06,666 --> 01:29:08,250 -Wow. -Hi. 1421 01:29:08,333 --> 01:29:09,166 Hey. 1422 01:29:09,750 --> 01:29:11,958 Uh, can we get the Ube All Day nachos? 1423 01:29:12,041 --> 01:29:13,125 Yes. 1424 01:29:13,208 --> 01:29:14,625 Thank you. 1425 01:29:16,916 --> 01:29:18,208 Oh, my God! 1426 01:29:18,291 --> 01:29:19,750 Shit, it's on fire! 1427 01:29:29,750 --> 01:29:30,666 So sorry. 1428 01:29:30,750 --> 01:29:34,500 I can't make your dessert nachos… 1429 01:29:35,250 --> 01:29:36,125 anymore. 1430 01:29:36,208 --> 01:29:37,791 I hate you. 1431 01:29:37,875 --> 01:29:39,000 I'm so sorry. 1432 01:29:39,083 --> 01:29:40,666 You've taught her to hate. 1433 01:29:55,125 --> 01:29:55,958 Stupid. 1434 01:29:59,000 --> 01:30:00,708 We're closed! 1435 01:30:03,458 --> 01:30:05,250 I said we're closed! 1436 01:30:08,750 --> 01:30:11,000 -Zella, what are you doing here? -Shit. 1437 01:30:11,083 --> 01:30:12,125 Short circuit? 1438 01:30:12,958 --> 01:30:15,666 I guess. 1439 01:30:15,750 --> 01:30:17,416 Probably overloaded the battery. 1440 01:30:17,500 --> 01:30:19,708 Need to beef up the power system. 1441 01:30:21,916 --> 01:30:24,791 Why are you pre-making chips? Everything needs to be served hot. 1442 01:30:24,875 --> 01:30:29,791 Well, I don't have time to make fresh chips every single order. 1443 01:30:29,875 --> 01:30:31,291 Seems like you do. 1444 01:30:31,375 --> 01:30:33,583 Which brings me to why, in all that's holy, 1445 01:30:33,666 --> 01:30:35,125 are you parked in the Marina? 1446 01:30:35,208 --> 01:30:38,541 The Marina's pretty, and there's lots of joggers and-- 1447 01:30:38,625 --> 01:30:42,291 Preppy tech bros and Karens and vegan Alo clones? 1448 01:30:42,791 --> 01:30:44,708 Everyone hates the Marina. 1449 01:30:45,208 --> 01:30:46,958 The Marina hates itself. 1450 01:30:47,041 --> 01:30:48,541 It's basically LA. 1451 01:30:48,625 --> 01:30:51,166 Let's pretend this little soft opening… 1452 01:30:51,250 --> 01:30:53,291 extra soft, flaccid opening never happened. 1453 01:30:53,375 --> 01:30:59,250 We move the truck to our grand reopening at Hippie Hill. 1454 01:30:59,333 --> 01:31:00,500 "We"? 1455 01:31:00,583 --> 01:31:02,166 You asked who was with you, right? 1456 01:31:02,250 --> 01:31:03,208 Yeah. 1457 01:31:05,166 --> 01:31:06,833 I'm with you, okay? 1458 01:31:10,250 --> 01:31:11,291 I'm with you. 1459 01:31:11,875 --> 01:31:12,750 Why? 1460 01:31:13,250 --> 01:31:14,458 You're good. 1461 01:31:15,000 --> 01:31:16,458 And so am I. 1462 01:31:16,541 --> 01:31:19,625 And if you can't join 'em, beat 'em. 1463 01:31:40,750 --> 01:31:46,791 When the lights go down in the city 1464 01:31:47,958 --> 01:31:54,166 And the sun shines on the bay 1465 01:31:55,041 --> 01:32:00,916 Ooh, I wanna be there in my city 1466 01:32:01,000 --> 01:32:02,208 Oh 1467 01:32:02,291 --> 01:32:09,125 Oh, oh, oh! 1468 01:32:09,208 --> 01:32:12,500 Yeah, yeah! 1469 01:32:16,708 --> 01:32:21,750 Oh, oh, ah 1470 01:32:22,791 --> 01:32:29,500 When the lights go down in the city 1471 01:32:29,583 --> 01:32:35,708 And the sun shines on the bay 1472 01:32:36,375 --> 01:32:42,166 Ooh, I wanna be there in my city 1473 01:32:42,250 --> 01:32:44,000 Oh 1474 01:32:44,083 --> 01:32:49,416 Oh, oh, oh 1475 01:32:50,708 --> 01:32:56,833 Oh, oh, oh 1476 01:33:01,708 --> 01:33:03,208 -Hi. -Jill. 1477 01:33:03,291 --> 01:33:05,458 You're home. 1478 01:33:05,541 --> 01:33:06,416 Hi, honey. 1479 01:33:08,833 --> 01:33:11,625 Yeah. Okay, perfect. 1480 01:33:12,125 --> 01:33:13,208 Okay. 1481 01:33:19,750 --> 01:33:21,166 Mm. 1482 01:33:28,708 --> 01:33:30,625 I ate. I just wanted to come say hi to you. 1483 01:33:31,875 --> 01:33:33,291 -Hi. -Hi. 1484 01:33:35,750 --> 01:33:36,625 How are you? 1485 01:33:37,875 --> 01:33:39,375 Will you talk to me? 1486 01:33:40,166 --> 01:33:42,041 We never see you anymore. 1487 01:33:44,125 --> 01:33:47,041 Wes, you spend every night at José's. 1488 01:33:48,000 --> 01:33:49,958 -She's not at José's. -I know that. 1489 01:33:50,041 --> 01:33:53,583 -Do you know that? -I… know that. 1490 01:33:56,958 --> 01:33:58,291 I just love José's. 1491 01:33:59,500 --> 01:34:02,000 No one loves José's that much. 1492 01:34:02,875 --> 01:34:05,500 José doesn't love José's that much. 1493 01:34:05,583 --> 01:34:07,208 I love José's that much. 1494 01:34:09,666 --> 01:34:13,000 Jill's doing really well. If it helps. 1495 01:34:13,583 --> 01:34:15,833 -She got a food truck. -How do you know? 1496 01:34:16,750 --> 01:34:18,916 Obviously, I follow her on Instagram. She's adorable. 1497 01:34:22,333 --> 01:34:23,625 You don't ever peek? 1498 01:34:25,166 --> 01:34:28,000 I think she's had enough of me peeking into her life. 1499 01:34:31,500 --> 01:34:32,666 Yeah. 1500 01:34:34,958 --> 01:34:35,958 Yeah. 1501 01:34:48,583 --> 01:34:50,625 I hope she got her voicemails back. 1502 01:34:50,708 --> 01:34:51,750 What? 1503 01:34:53,833 --> 01:34:57,333 She posted about losing all of her voicemails from Isabelle. 1504 01:34:59,375 --> 01:35:00,375 It was a while ago. 1505 01:35:00,458 --> 01:35:05,083 She was asking if anyone knew how to recover them. 1506 01:35:10,250 --> 01:35:11,875 Voicemails? 1507 01:35:11,958 --> 01:35:14,291 They're encrypted. 1508 01:35:14,375 --> 01:35:15,791 Probably already wiped. 1509 01:35:16,458 --> 01:35:19,541 Even if they're not, you'd have to hack into a telecom server, 1510 01:35:19,625 --> 01:35:21,875 which is how you end up on a watch list. 1511 01:35:22,458 --> 01:35:26,625 Why don't you try getting your sales the old-fashioned way, Wes? By selling. 1512 01:35:28,708 --> 01:35:31,500 No, Felix, it's not for a sale, man. 1513 01:35:31,583 --> 01:35:32,833 It's for a girl. 1514 01:35:38,416 --> 01:35:40,041 And I did everything wrong. 1515 01:35:42,666 --> 01:35:44,625 But this feels like one thing… 1516 01:35:47,000 --> 01:35:49,750 I don't know, maybe the only thing that I can do right. 1517 01:35:59,208 --> 01:36:00,791 Magic: The Gathering? 1518 01:36:00,875 --> 01:36:03,125 What do you think I am? A loser? 1519 01:36:03,208 --> 01:36:07,833 That, Felix, is an Alpha Edition Black Lotus card. 1520 01:36:08,708 --> 01:36:11,000 That's the most valuable thing I own. 1521 01:36:11,833 --> 01:36:15,208 If anyone can do this, it's you. 1522 01:36:25,166 --> 01:36:26,083 Wes! 1523 01:36:28,416 --> 01:36:31,500 Maybe you should just… call her? 1524 01:36:33,583 --> 01:36:35,291 No. She wouldn't answer. 1525 01:36:37,125 --> 01:36:38,125 Then… 1526 01:36:39,333 --> 01:36:40,833 leave her a voicemail. 1527 01:36:43,750 --> 01:36:47,125 There's glitter on the floor After the party… 1528 01:36:54,208 --> 01:36:56,541 Candle wax and Polaroids On the hardwood floor… 1529 01:36:56,625 --> 01:36:58,916 You've reached Jill, and you know the drill. 1530 01:36:59,625 --> 01:37:02,458 Hey, Jill. Uh, it's Wes. 1531 01:37:03,833 --> 01:37:04,791 Been a minute. 1532 01:37:05,875 --> 01:37:06,875 Um… 1533 01:37:08,666 --> 01:37:11,708 I saw your food truck is popping off. 1534 01:37:13,291 --> 01:37:14,750 I'm so proud of you. 1535 01:37:15,583 --> 01:37:18,250 I… If I can say that. Um… 1536 01:37:23,333 --> 01:37:24,375 I just… 1537 01:37:24,458 --> 01:37:29,458 I wanted to let you know that, uh, I got a new work number, 1538 01:37:29,541 --> 01:37:34,208 so you can continue to leave voicemails. 1539 01:37:35,875 --> 01:37:40,291 Um, I paid for the line to the end of next year. 1540 01:37:40,375 --> 01:37:43,500 And I can extend it longer too. 1541 01:37:43,583 --> 01:37:45,750 Um, as long as you want. 1542 01:37:45,833 --> 01:37:48,791 And no one will be listening. 1543 01:37:50,416 --> 01:37:51,500 Just Izzy. 1544 01:37:52,208 --> 01:37:57,125 I want your midnights… 1545 01:37:57,208 --> 01:37:59,875 You probably have plans tonight, um, 1546 01:38:00,833 --> 01:38:05,916 but I was thinking of ringing in the New Year at José's. 1547 01:38:07,916 --> 01:38:12,625 You know, who needs a midnight kiss when you can smash a taco? Am I right? 1548 01:38:13,833 --> 01:38:15,125 That, um… 1549 01:38:16,833 --> 01:38:19,416 Sorry, that sounded better in my head. Uh… 1550 01:38:24,083 --> 01:38:26,458 I don't even know if you're in town. 1551 01:38:27,875 --> 01:38:29,458 So, um… 1552 01:38:33,708 --> 01:38:35,625 Happy New Year, Jill. 1553 01:38:40,458 --> 01:38:41,916 -Intervention. -What? 1554 01:38:42,000 --> 01:38:43,500 -Intervention! -What are you-- 1555 01:38:43,583 --> 01:38:46,083 -You stood us up! Again. -Mm-hm! 1556 01:38:46,166 --> 01:38:49,500 No cousin of mine is spending New Year's alone, crying to Taylor Swift. 1557 01:38:49,583 --> 01:38:51,041 I don't cry to Taylor Swift. 1558 01:38:51,125 --> 01:38:53,875 -The whole block can hear! -They're complaining again. 1559 01:38:53,958 --> 01:38:57,083 -Okay, well, I have plans tonight, so… -No more tacos! 1560 01:38:57,166 --> 01:38:58,041 Yes, tacos! 1561 01:38:58,125 --> 01:38:59,125 I miss the old Wes! 1562 01:38:59,208 --> 01:39:01,958 I'm sorry. The old Wes can't come to the phone right now. 1563 01:39:02,041 --> 01:39:03,958 -Why? Oh… -Oh, no. Don't you dare. 1564 01:39:04,041 --> 01:39:06,416 -Because he's dead. -Get your ass in the shower! 1565 01:39:06,500 --> 01:39:09,958 My God, you need a shower. We are going to the party. 1566 01:39:10,041 --> 01:39:10,875 -No! -Yes! 1567 01:39:10,958 --> 01:39:12,541 -No! -Yes! 1568 01:39:15,666 --> 01:39:17,416 Okay. Very mature. 1569 01:39:17,500 --> 01:39:18,416 No! 1570 01:39:25,583 --> 01:39:27,208 I'm Postmating champagne. 1571 01:39:27,291 --> 01:39:28,500 -Very nice. -Wait. 1572 01:39:28,583 --> 01:39:29,875 Look what you made me do! 1573 01:39:29,958 --> 01:39:34,875 I was thinking of ringing in the New Year at José's. 1574 01:39:34,958 --> 01:39:40,000 You know, who needs a midnight kiss when you can smash a taco? Am I right? 1575 01:39:48,458 --> 01:39:49,333 What? 1576 01:39:56,708 --> 01:39:58,458 Thirty minutes. 1577 01:39:58,541 --> 01:39:59,541 Whoo! 1578 01:40:00,750 --> 01:40:02,166 Whoo. 1579 01:40:58,041 --> 01:41:00,333 What was it about her, Wes? 1580 01:41:07,666 --> 01:41:09,500 She had no filter to speak of. 1581 01:41:09,583 --> 01:41:11,333 Hm. 1582 01:41:12,583 --> 01:41:15,666 Her cheeks were always full of food, 1583 01:41:15,750 --> 01:41:16,708 like a… 1584 01:41:17,583 --> 01:41:18,833 sexy chipmunk. 1585 01:41:21,333 --> 01:41:22,291 And… 1586 01:41:24,541 --> 01:41:27,083 -Do you guys know what a kumquat is? -Nope. 1587 01:41:27,166 --> 01:41:29,958 A small citrus fruit native to Southeast Asia. 1588 01:41:30,708 --> 01:41:31,708 Yeah. 1589 01:41:33,083 --> 01:41:33,958 That was weird. 1590 01:41:38,458 --> 01:41:39,375 And her laugh. 1591 01:41:40,791 --> 01:41:42,083 It was, um… 1592 01:41:47,916 --> 01:41:48,916 Yeah. 1593 01:41:50,708 --> 01:41:52,000 I am broken. 1594 01:41:55,333 --> 01:41:57,041 And she was the dream. 1595 01:41:57,875 --> 01:41:59,875 Have you told her that? 1596 01:42:00,666 --> 01:42:02,958 She is home for the holidays. 1597 01:42:03,041 --> 01:42:04,666 No, it's too late. 1598 01:42:05,500 --> 01:42:09,958 You said it, Breeds, like, she's not there. 1599 01:42:10,041 --> 01:42:11,791 Why would she be? She… 1600 01:42:14,541 --> 01:42:15,625 I don't deserve that. 1601 01:42:21,666 --> 01:42:26,041 Maybe sometimes life rigs things in our favor. 1602 01:42:36,708 --> 01:42:37,666 What? 1603 01:42:46,250 --> 01:42:47,250 Oh, my God. 1604 01:42:55,708 --> 01:42:57,333 Hello? 1605 01:42:57,416 --> 01:43:00,208 Hello? I think I have the wrong number. 1606 01:43:00,291 --> 01:43:02,250 I'm trying to reach my big brother, Jill, 1607 01:43:02,333 --> 01:43:04,791 who has an interview today. Maybe you've heard of her? 1608 01:43:04,875 --> 01:43:08,791 My brother, Jill, who macked on Colin Corwin then whupped his ass. 1609 01:43:08,875 --> 01:43:13,625 My brother that is the hottest, bravest, baddest bitch on the block. 1610 01:43:13,708 --> 01:43:16,041 Condoms wear her for protection. 1611 01:43:17,083 --> 01:43:21,666 "Simba, remember who you are." 1612 01:43:23,791 --> 01:43:27,541 That was not my best. 1613 01:43:29,750 --> 01:43:31,791 I've got a good feeling about this one, Jilly. 1614 01:43:32,791 --> 01:43:35,541 It's okay if you're scared. I'm right there with you. 1615 01:43:35,625 --> 01:43:36,666 You feel that? 1616 01:43:37,333 --> 01:43:38,791 That's me, brother. 1617 01:43:39,791 --> 01:43:40,833 Get out there. 1618 01:43:51,958 --> 01:43:54,125 This is the part where you run, Wes. 1619 01:43:57,375 --> 01:43:58,666 -Run! -You have 15 minutes. 1620 01:43:58,750 --> 01:44:00,041 -Okay. Run? -Now. Go. 1621 01:44:00,125 --> 01:44:01,500 -I should go? -Yes, go. 1622 01:44:02,750 --> 01:44:05,250 Don't take 1623 01:44:05,333 --> 01:44:06,916 -Love you. -Oh, there he goes. 1624 01:44:07,000 --> 01:44:09,416 These beautiful things that I've got 1625 01:44:09,500 --> 01:44:12,666 Please stay 1626 01:44:13,833 --> 01:44:16,541 I want you, I need you, oh, God 1627 01:44:16,625 --> 01:44:19,583 Don't take 1628 01:44:20,583 --> 01:44:23,250 These beautiful things that I've got… 1629 01:44:24,291 --> 01:44:25,958 Oh, shit! Whoa! 1630 01:44:26,041 --> 01:44:27,166 Get out of the street! 1631 01:44:27,250 --> 01:44:30,125 These beautiful things that I've got 1632 01:44:30,208 --> 01:44:34,416 Oh, oh, oh 1633 01:44:34,500 --> 01:44:37,041 Ooh 1634 01:44:37,125 --> 01:44:41,291 Whoa, oh, oh 1635 01:44:41,375 --> 01:44:43,875 Ooh 1636 01:44:43,958 --> 01:44:47,041 Please stay 1637 01:44:50,333 --> 01:44:51,375 Sorry! 1638 01:44:51,458 --> 01:44:54,916 Just-- Just looking for somebody. I'll just be one second. 1639 01:44:55,000 --> 01:44:57,875 These beautiful things that I've got 1640 01:45:14,458 --> 01:45:16,541 -Hi. -Wait. Jill. Um… 1641 01:45:18,583 --> 01:45:20,125 I gotta tell you something. 1642 01:45:22,625 --> 01:45:23,625 I love you. 1643 01:45:25,083 --> 01:45:30,125 In a very uncool, desperate, all-consuming kind of way. 1644 01:45:30,208 --> 01:45:32,833 But it wasn't from the moment that I saw you. 1645 01:45:32,916 --> 01:45:35,333 It was… before then. 1646 01:45:35,416 --> 01:45:36,291 And… 1647 01:45:38,291 --> 01:45:39,416 I'm scared. 1648 01:45:39,500 --> 01:45:41,625 And I… 1649 01:45:42,250 --> 01:45:44,500 I don't really have the tools for this. But… 1650 01:45:45,541 --> 01:45:48,708 you make me feel brave. 1651 01:45:53,208 --> 01:45:54,875 You make me feel everything. 1652 01:45:59,791 --> 01:46:02,041 I know that you don't need a man, Jill. 1653 01:46:04,958 --> 01:46:06,750 But I sure as hell need you. 1654 01:46:20,833 --> 01:46:22,750 That was good. Really good. 1655 01:46:22,833 --> 01:46:24,375 -Are you sure? -Yeah. 1656 01:46:26,500 --> 01:46:28,958 -I feel like Meg Ryan. -Mm. 1657 01:46:29,041 --> 01:46:31,541 Well, then that would make me Tom-- 1658 01:46:31,625 --> 01:46:33,625 Oh, sorry! 1659 01:46:33,708 --> 01:46:35,500 I told you, I said I was leaving. Okay. 1660 01:46:35,583 --> 01:46:38,083 Yeah, yeah, yeah! 1661 01:46:38,166 --> 01:46:39,083 -Lo siento. -Thank you. 1662 01:46:44,541 --> 01:46:45,791 Hello. 1663 01:46:45,875 --> 01:46:47,916 Oh, sorry. Just give me one sec. 1664 01:46:48,541 --> 01:46:49,958 I'm gonna go take my break, okay? 1665 01:46:50,041 --> 01:46:51,250 -Do it up. -Okay. 1666 01:46:51,958 --> 01:46:52,958 Next. 1667 01:46:55,750 --> 01:46:58,625 Your call has been forwarded to voicemail. 1668 01:46:59,375 --> 01:47:00,833 Hey, Isabelle. 1669 01:47:02,291 --> 01:47:03,416 This is Wes. 1670 01:47:06,333 --> 01:47:08,291 I wanted to ask for your blessing. 1671 01:47:09,666 --> 01:47:11,666 I'm gonna ask Jill to move in with me. 1672 01:47:13,416 --> 01:47:14,791 Or here, so… 1673 01:47:15,541 --> 01:47:20,291 I mean, I guess I'm actually gonna ask if I can move to her. 1674 01:47:21,750 --> 01:47:22,750 Um… 1675 01:47:25,916 --> 01:47:30,541 I know that I can never replace you, but… 1676 01:47:31,916 --> 01:47:34,375 I promise to watch every episode of Top Chef. 1677 01:47:35,166 --> 01:47:36,708 Even after I've seen 'em all. 1678 01:47:37,416 --> 01:47:43,333 And, yes, I promise to partake in all the Robyn dance parties. 1679 01:47:46,500 --> 01:47:47,625 I am… 1680 01:47:49,250 --> 01:47:51,000 sorry I never got to meet you. 1681 01:47:52,333 --> 01:47:54,166 I always wanted a little sister. 1682 01:47:55,333 --> 01:48:00,750 So if there's any way that you could just, like, give me a sign. 1683 01:48:00,833 --> 01:48:02,166 Hey, Izz. 1684 01:48:03,750 --> 01:48:04,583 I'll be really quick. 1685 01:48:04,666 --> 01:48:07,958 I'll let you get back to margaritas with Grandpa and Elvis, but I… 1686 01:48:11,125 --> 01:48:14,083 I just wanted to let you know that this is my last voicemail. 1687 01:48:15,750 --> 01:48:18,541 And I wanted to tell you not to worry about me, okay? 1688 01:48:20,041 --> 01:48:21,333 I'm gonna be all right. 1689 01:48:24,666 --> 01:48:25,958 This Wes kid… 1690 01:48:28,125 --> 01:48:29,875 I think he's a bird like us. 1691 01:48:31,583 --> 01:48:33,375 I mean, he can't fry an egg, 1692 01:48:33,458 --> 01:48:35,875 and he acts all cool, 1693 01:48:35,958 --> 01:48:37,958 but he's actually a Magic: The Gathering nerd. 1694 01:48:40,125 --> 01:48:43,333 And he says that he can't dance. I… I'm working on it. 1695 01:48:45,916 --> 01:48:48,750 But yeah, I just wanted to call and say that… 1696 01:48:50,541 --> 01:48:51,375 Oh, my God. 1697 01:48:53,750 --> 01:48:56,833 Oh, my God, Izz, it's our song. It's Robyn! It's Robyn! 1698 01:48:56,916 --> 01:48:59,750 Like a dove with a sign that says, "Yes, Wes." 1699 01:48:59,833 --> 01:49:01,958 -It's Robyn! -Ooh-- I gotta go. 1700 01:49:02,041 --> 01:49:04,708 It's Robyn! 1701 01:49:04,791 --> 01:49:06,708 Bitch really loves Robyn. 1702 01:49:07,291 --> 01:49:09,333 Oh 1703 01:49:10,875 --> 01:49:15,250 I'm right over here Why can't you see me? 1704 01:49:15,333 --> 01:49:17,500 Oh 1705 01:49:18,291 --> 01:49:19,250 Well played. 1706 01:49:19,333 --> 01:49:21,291 I'm giving it my all 1707 01:49:21,375 --> 01:49:25,583 But I'm not the girl You're takin' home 1708 01:49:25,666 --> 01:49:27,500 Ooh 1709 01:49:27,583 --> 01:49:32,666 I keep dancing on my own 1710 01:49:32,750 --> 01:49:33,833 You ready? 1711 01:49:33,916 --> 01:49:36,333 Dancing on my own 1712 01:49:51,958 --> 01:49:56,500 So far away, but still so near 1713 01:49:56,583 --> 01:50:00,291 The lights go on, the music dies 1714 01:50:00,375 --> 01:50:03,333 But you don't see me standing here 1715 01:50:03,416 --> 01:50:05,083 I love you, Isabelle. 1716 01:50:05,166 --> 01:50:08,708 I just came to say goodbye 1717 01:50:08,791 --> 01:50:12,833 I'm in the corner Watchin' you kiss her 1718 01:50:12,916 --> 01:50:15,833 Oh 1719 01:50:16,500 --> 01:50:18,958 I'm giving it my all 1720 01:50:19,041 --> 01:50:23,208 But I'm not the girl You're takin' home 1721 01:50:23,291 --> 01:50:25,208 Ooh 1722 01:50:25,291 --> 01:50:29,250 I keep dancing on my own 1723 01:50:29,333 --> 01:50:32,875 I keep dancing on my own 1724 01:50:33,458 --> 01:50:37,375 I'm in the corner Watchin' you kiss her 1725 01:50:37,458 --> 01:50:40,041 Oh 1726 01:50:41,416 --> 01:50:45,250 I'm right over here Why can't you see me? 1727 01:50:45,333 --> 01:50:48,250 Oh 1728 01:50:49,458 --> 01:50:55,791 I'm giving it my all But I'm not the girl you're takin' home 1729 01:50:55,875 --> 01:50:57,625 Ooh 1730 01:50:57,708 --> 01:51:02,041 I keep dancing on my own 1731 01:51:02,125 --> 01:51:06,625 I keep dancing on my own 1732 01:51:18,541 --> 01:51:22,666 I keep dancing on my own