- ♪Oh Mama, I can hear you a-crying ♪
♪ You're so scared and all alone ♪
Hawk! Hawk! Hawk!
♪ The jig is up, the news is out ♪
♪ They've finally found me ♪
- ♪ The renegade who had it made ♪
♪ Retrieved for a bounty… ♪
What did I tell you? LeBron and Bronny.
- Dad, stop. Bronny's not even good. - He's a developmental talent.
Dad, seriously?
Fucking love this shit.
Three gladiators entering the Colosseum.
Yeah, feels good.
Praetorian Guard stands by.
Yeah, cool.
What beasts will be let loose? What heroes will be made?
What's going on, Golden? You writing a book?
Cry havoc and let slip the dogs of war.
Know what happens when you let the dogs slip?
- What's that? - People be asking…
♪ Who let the dogs out? ♪
♪ Who? Who? Who? Who let the dogs out? ♪
It's called Greek mythology, Hawk. You ought to do more reading.
That's a group called the Baha Men.
- ♪ They call him the Hawk ♪ - ♪ Hawk! ♪
♪ He's a golfer ♪
♪ The greatest golfer in the world! ♪
Welcome back to the beautiful Genesis Invitational
on this gorgeous afternoon.
And, Steve, have you ever seen a pairing as anticipated as what we're about to see?
I cannot remember anything like it.
You have the great Lonnie Hawkins teeing off
for the first time on the PGA Tour in seven years,
playing against his own son, Lance Hawkins,
and Golden Fisk, the man some say destroyed his confidence at the US Open.
Notah, we are in for quite the show today.
Let's get it to the first with Hally Leadbetter.
Thanks, Notah. Golden hit a massive drive
down the center of the fairway. He is absolutely relishing this pairing.
Now, this first tee shot will be a good test
to see if Lance Hawkins can handle the pressure.
Got ahold of that one, but it is moving left.
Just caught the rough, but he should have a good angle onto the green from there.
- Moved your hand too much. - You're wearing a woman's shirt.
No, I'm not.
And now, the golf world has been waiting for this moment for seven years.
Hawkins fans may have noticed Lonnie made an 11th-hour change to his caddie
on the eve of his return to the PGA Tour.
- Hey, did you miss me, everybody? - Oh, we sure did!
Check out my whiz kid caddie, Gustavo, right here.
He's worth every penny.
- Gustavo! - Yeah.
What is going through his mind?
- ♪ It comes and it goes ♪ -
♪ It's in the way that you use it ♪
♪ Feelings will show ♪
♪ So don't you ever abuse it ♪
- He hit a rocket. It's hooking. - Go! Mashed potatoes!
In the rough right behind Lance. The crowds out here are going crazy.
Let's go, Lonnie!
Turned your hand too much.
I meant to. I wanna play right next to my offspring.
Hey, that is dangerous. Someone could get hurt.
Right, Gustavo.
I'm loving this guy.
Ay, pinche.
Sorry, excuse me.
Hey, Nat.
- Hey. - Hey, there you are.
- What's wrong? - Huh? Nothing.
- You good? - Yeah.
- You look stressed. - No, I don't get stressed.
Terrible for your endocrine system.
- Endo-crin. - It's endocrine, 100%.
Hey, Nat, Nat, Nat. Lance forgot his phone.
- You know how he is without that phone. - Of course he forgot his phone.
- I know. - Okay, well, I'll go grab it. Where is it?
There in the hotel room. I can go grab it. Shoot me the keys.
No, it's all good. I got it. Where is it in the room?
That's the thing, he doesn't even know. He has a vague idea where he put it.
- Could be a bunch of different places. - I left my sunglasses by the pool anyway.
No problem. I can grab your sunglasses. I'm gonna go by the pool.
I'll be there fast. I'm gonna sprint.
I know the course better than you. I'm gonna go through the 8th hole--
Jerry, if you run into Lance, let him know I'm going to grab his phone.
I'll be right back. Hold this. And Jerry… try to relax.
Yeah! I'm relaxed! I don't-- Don't even know what you're talking about.
Shit, shit, fucking shit.
Shit, fuck, shit.
How are we doing today? We doing good? Let me know if you need anything. Hello.
Okay, everybody has their drinks.
Oh God, I'm getting… I'm overwhelmed.
Well, he already has one.
Stacy, what did I tell you?
It's a good spot.
Oh yes, Anton, you are such a darling.
I really can't thank you enough for all of your help.
Oh, it's nothing. And like I told you,
the golfers walk right by here on their turn to the 10th hole.
Stacy, we're gonna sell out before 5:00.
It's gonna be fine. We'll have enough for the rest of the week. Don't worry.
Is that gentleman your significant other?
He's actually more like a traveling companion, really.
Oh. And may I ask how Lonnie feels about that?
- Oh… - Don't mean to pry.
No prying at all. Lonnie?
Uh, he's… Well…
I don't wanna say this too loud, but he's very jealous of Radford. Very.
As a matter of fact, he's gonna shit blood
when he sees me and Radford selling my beverage out here.
Stacy, official duty calls, but let me know if there's anything you need.
I will, Anton. Thank you so much again.
Of course. Of course.
Pull over up here, I need to urinate.
What did that snake want?
Oh well, he'd like to erase the image of his wife being pounded by Lonnie Hawkins,
but we know that's never gonna happen.
- You little vixen, you. - Ooh…
Radford, customers.
And, Notah, a multiple major winner leads the way right now.
Absolutely, Steve. Justin Thomas leading the charge
with five holes left to play in his opening round.
Fisk off to a hot start, three under in his first four holes.
Let's get it down to Hally at five.
Notah, the Hawkins family has had a rocky start, with Lonnie doubling two
and Lance needing to take a drop from a hazard on three.
He's got this for par.
Your old man getting in your head?
Yeah, right, my head? You know what's inside my head?
What?
Just a
small little box the size of an M&M.
And inside that box is an even smaller box the size of a mini M&M.
And inside that box is a handwritten note.
- You know what it says? - I don't know.
- "Fuck you." - Oh.
Shoot, I actually kinda like that. Write that down, Laszlo.
But, kid, you're gonna wanna keep in mind your dad,
he's two shots up after four holes.
- You understand that? - I understand.
Hey, you ever do the Dew?
I don't frequently do the Dew, but B-Dubs has the Dew.
I'll… I'll do the Dew when I have the urge.
Also, they have what's called a Radler, which is a brew and a Dew.
What are you talking about?
The Dew, at B-Dubs.
I get a traditional and boneless combo.
Can't be beat.
Hey, let's maybe hit that after the round.
- Hit what? - B-Dubs. You gonna be like this all day?
- Like what? - A Debbie Downer.
I need to see some fun out of you.
Maybe put your hat on backwards or something.
I… I-- I am fun.
That is not fun.
Come on, come on. Break, break, break.
- Oh!
Walk it off.
Great miss. You'll make it up on the next hole.
This motherfucker…
All right.
Outside the left.
Okay. Okay, this is what I'm talking about, okay?
I don't need you to help me putt. Just please stay back.
Let the Hawk take wing.
I told you, outside, left.
- When did you tell me? - I to… I told you. You said, "I got this."
Well, you see… You gotta get my attention.
You gotta, like, really…
You gotta almost grab me by the shoulders and shake me.
- Next time I will. - Or make it fun. Do a funny voice.
Golf. Four, six, five, three.
Shit.
Hawk. Four, two, nine, five.
Yeah, come on!
Come on!
Did you see that?
Just gorgeous.
I'm talking, like, perfect.
Like Dua Lipa in a white bikini on the beach in Cabo kind of perfect.
Jesus fucking Christ!
Lance, the Lord's name.
Oh my God, Carl, not today.
Hmm.
Okay.
No, put the wedge back in the bag. Grab me the two iron.
You have a two iron?
Yeah, I have a two iron.
And put in that little book you've been writing all day
that Lonnie Hawkins smashed the ball through the woods
up on the green with a two iron.
That is impossible.
Heh, maybe for you.
But you are not the mighty Hawk.
Caw caw!
You gotta let me cook, Gustavo.
If the Hawk could play normal golf the way he scrambles…
Fuck.
And that's what he gives you. He's been inconsistent today, Notah.
But only Lonnie Hawkins would even try that shot.
Hey, Gustavo, what's Spanish for "eat shit"?
Comer caca.
Oh, comer caca, okay. I don't mean anything by that.
Golden Fisk is leading the way in this group
with Lonnie Hawkins four strokes behind him.
Lance really struggling, but great bunker shot there.
Lonnie has this for birdie after that incredible shot from the trees.
Okay, he'll take a par after that tee shot.
- Just not your day, Lonnie. - Hey. Watch it, Fisk.
Sometimes you pet the Hawk and it turns out to be the Cougar.
All right.
Well, I was thinking more like a sloth or a… a kakapo.
- See, a kakapo, it's a flightless bird. - I know that.
- It doesn't fly. Understand? - Yeah. I get that.
And to be honest, I was hoping for a little more grit
and fight out of the Hawkins family today.
You mind? I'm gonna tap this birdie in.
- I don't mind. - I hear they have books on etiquette.
- Yeah. I know. - You do?
I wrote one. Golf Hawk-a-tit-tic.
Golf Hawk-tiquette?
- Hawk-tiquette. - Okay.
And by the way, you look fucking ridiculous in that shirt.
You're gonna be on SportsCenter.
- It's gonna be 'cause of that. - I'm gettin' a lotta compliments.
- You smoke Virginia Slims now too? - On occasion.
- Yeah. - Wine coolers, huh?
Come on, get the fuck out of here. Goddamn.
Yes.
I'm gonna hit the head. Try and find me a banana.
Lance, I'll join you.
I shoulda pissed in the woods, but there are too many cameras.
- Hey, Natalie, there you are. - Shut up, Jerry.
- Wait, are you going to find Lance? - Shut the fuck up, Jerry!
Okay.
- Wait. Hey, let me explain something. - Get your hands off me, you creep!
You fucking pervert! Fuck!
What?
Hey, hold on. No, hold on a second. Just let me tell you.
Can I explain something to you real quick, please?
- Lance! - Hey, buddy.
- Hey, Nat, where you been? - Hey!
- Yeah, found your phone, asshole. - Whoa.
Oh!
- Ow! Fuck. - Don't fucking talk to me ever again.
Don't text me, call me, don't send me dick pics like you did that other woman.
None of that shit! Just get the fuck out of my life, okay?
Yeah. Yeah, everybody, that's what he does.
He sends dick pics all day long…
- Shit. - No, I don't. No.
…to all these different women!
Hell hath no fury, right, Carl?
What is dick pic?
Oh, and he owes half a million dollars to some guy named Preacher.
Nat, stop.
Bye, asshole!
Do you want your--
- Move! Pervert! - Shit.
I've seen my fair share of golf…
Radford. I need you to hold down the fort, okay?
- Yeah. - I'm taking those.
I don't send dick pics all day.
No. Of course. Of course not.
I mean, she seemed crazy. You seemed super cool.
I mean, I'm sending a totally average, normal number of dick pics.
Just block it out. That's what we do.
That's the healthy thing to do. Block it out.
Nine to play.
Golden's making us look like a couple of amateurs.
So the question is are…
…you
a
pro
or
are
you
a amateur?
Okay, fuck off.
Hey, block it out.
Mmm! Shoot.
Wait. Natalie!
Natalie!
- Natalie. - What?
Take a deep breath.
God, I feel so stupid.
You are stupid.
- How could I let this happen? - It's not your fault.
- He did all the right things! - Uh-huh.
- He said he loved me! We were engaged! - That's what they say. I know.
He proposed to me, and I believed everything that he said!
- You're dumb. - Ugh!
Have one of these.
- God… - Lance is a real piece of shit, okay?
You did not deserve this.
No woman ever does.
We were gonna be married.
I know, but isn't it great?
You got out!
You do not realize how lucky you are, Natalie.
I don't feel lucky.
Okay, see all those golfers?
All those little fuckers out there, they're all full-blown shits.
You think Lance cared about what happened? He doesn't give a shit about you.
You were one room in his brain
that he could shut the door on so he could play golf. You get it?
Listen to me, Natalie. This is the best day of your life, okay?
You may not realize it now,
but I promise you, Natalie, someday you will.
Why isn't this beverage in every supermarket in America?
That's very sweet. I don't know.
Lonnie Hawkins has returned to the PGA Tour.
How do we know?
After what looked like a turnaround for both Lance Hawkins
and Lonnie at the turn,
the Hawk, Notah… let's just say he had a real Hawk moment.
Well, you gotta be kidding me.
On the 16th, he got into a shouting match with his own caddie, Gustavo Meyer,
and Lonnie steals his yardage book, and the chase is on.
- You're sick. - No.
Get that book. You gotta jump higher than that.
- Let me have it. I want the book. - There you go.
- There's your book. - My father gave me that book!
Let me tell you, you can steal a caddie's wallet,
but do not take their yardage book.
- Want to play now? Here we go. - You don't want this.
- Okay. Here we go. - You don't wanna mess with the Hawk.
- What are you doing? - No one fights like that.
Here. What are you… Oh!
Yeah.
Oh, now you're going to pay.
- Oh! - You can't outrun the Cougar!
There is something we rarely see in this sport,
and despite all of that,
he managed to claw his way into the top ten.
Lance Hawkins, meanwhile, struggled today to get it going.
Perhaps the pressure of playing alongside his father was more than he could handle.
Put on the WNBA All-Star game.
Hey.
Tough round out there today, huh?
Yeah, that was a fucking mess.
Dirk Ketchum, Tomorrow's Golf League.
What's that, like simulator golf?
Yeah, best in the world.
- Hmm! - Look, I'll cut to the chase.
Next week in Vegas, we're debuting some new features,
and we had Tiger and Rory lined up, then Tiger dropped out.
So, uh, now we're stuck.
Look, I'm just not interested, okay? It's not real golf.
- Well, that's debatable. - Hmm.
Listen, there's a lot of money in this.
If… If you can, you know, talk your dad into playing against you.
You two are the hottest names in golf right now.
Buddy, my dad will never compete in simulator golf.
Okay? The guy still carries around a two iron in his bag.
Thank you.
Here. Take my card.
There's three million in it.
Winner take all.
Wait, did you say winner takes all?
Three million if I win?
TV deal's already in place, guaranteed. Network wants you two.
Uh, yeah. No, he'll… he'll do it.
I thought you said that he would never do it.
Oh, no, back… No, I said…
- I said he would "ever" do that. - What do you mean he would ever do that?
You know, opposite of never. It means anytime, anyplace, brother.
- I've never heard that. - People say that all the time.
So he would always do it?
Yeah, he would ever in a million years do that.
It sounds so close to never.
Yeah. No, we're in.
- That's great. - Yeah.
- See you in Vegas. - Great news.
Lance, honey? Can I come in?
Lance.
Can you let me in?
Hi.
You're having a little drink?
- Yeah. So? - Well, you deserve it.
Do I?
I played like shit today.
Aw… Sorry about Natalie.
What happened to Natalie?
Oh, yeah, the whole…
Yeah, that was crazy, huh?
Yeah.
Listen, hon, we need to talk.
Your dad's beating you.
He's beating you bad,
and we need to win.
I know, but he's good.
I can outdrive him, but I don't know if I can outplay him.
- Of course you can. - And the crowd loves him.
- He's funny. - You think he's funny?
- He's not funny. - He's kind of funny.
- You're funny. - I'm not funny.
Don't let that get in your head. Let me tell you this story.
When you were a little boy, you were probably… five years old,
you made a complete golf course out of Legos.
Took you about a month to build. Do you remember that?
I have no recollection of this.
It had greens and little flags, and you built a cute little clubhouse,
and you waited for your daddy to come home to show him,
and what did he do?
He came in after a loss,
and he saw that little golf course that you were so proud of,
and he kicked it to pieces, and he broke it all up, smashed it.
- He did? - He did. And see this?
This is all that's left.
He did that to my Legos?
Yep, and you were so upset. You were crying.
You go, "Daddy, no, no, please!"
- And I said, "Lonnie, stop!" - What?
Oh my God, that monster.
Know who was there to clean up the mess?
You?
And you know who was there to rebuild the Legos?
You.
He's never been there for you, Lance. I'm the only one who's been there for you.
So listen, I need you to block out all the bullshit going on in your life,
and I need you to go out there tomorrow and get revenge for this little Lego.
I'm gonna fucking kill him.
That's my boy.
Allison, I love what you did with your hair. That looks great.
Oh shit, that's good.
♪ Say something, I'm giving up on you ♪
♪ I'm sorry that I couldn't get to you ♪
♪ Say something, I'm giving up on you ♪
♪ And I ♪
♪ Will swallow my pride ♪
♪ You're the one that I love ♪
♪ And I'm saying goodbye ♪
God…
Oh, come on.
- My book is soggy. - I don't wanna see that book today.
Hey, last night I went to B-Dubs.
I had a traditional and boneless combo with a Mountain Dew.
You're an idiot.
You are not a good caddie. You've made my game worse.
I hope you shit the bed and don't make the cut. I want to go home.
Well, if I did shit the bed, it'd come out B-Dubs, traditional, boneless combo.
If you shit the bed, it's gonna come out protein bars,
and some dumb salad, celery, corn, radishes, chicken pot pie, probably.
- Vitamins. - I would hate to see your microbiomes.
Lonnie!
You're up.
Damn.
Lonnie Hawkins showed up this morning
with a pickle jar stuck on his hand.
He's gonna attempt to play 18 holes one-handed.
Some trouble with the tee there.
Now he's giving his caddie some kind of look.
Is he calling his shot with the pickle jar?
Does he think he's Babe Ruth?
This'll be interesting.
Well struck, but…
- Son of a gun. - …well right.
Gonna get a Claussen endorsement.
You did this on purpose, didn't you? You knew I was gonna bury you,
so you put a pickle jar on your hand because you were scared.
I'm out here playing. I'm not running away.
Yeah? Your little tricks, they don't work on me.
Okay? You shouldn't have kicked my Legos.
Your son hates you too.
Everybody hates you.
Everybody.
Day two in the books at the Genesis,
a day that saw Lance Hawkins surge to the top of the leaderboard
with Golden Fisk right on his heels,
and a day that also saw Lonnie Hawkins a little pickled
after being disqualified for unauthorized equipment use.
Steve, let's talk about Lance first.
Notah, I have never seen a golfer more locked in.
He was playing like someone stole his ice cream out there.
And on the other side, what's to say?
Pure Lonnie. That's why they show up, that's why they love him.
But if he doesn't play to the level that got him back into the PGA Tour,
he will never get another shot at the US Open.
Where you going?
I'm gonna probably go see a doctor or a welder or a glassblower
to deal with this jar situation.
Why? Jar's your best friend.
How's that?
Oh, cut the shit, Dad.
We both know this jar is just an excuse.
It's not stuck.
It is stuck. I spent all night long trying to get it off.
There's absolutely-- Wow.
Look at that, it's a miracle.
Stop pretending. Just admit it, you can't face me on a golf course.
I can face you on any golf course there is.
- Really? - Yeah.
Well, I'm playing in Vegas next week.
If you think you can beat me… why don't you come out?
PGA Tour's in Dallas next week.
Yeah, this is TGL.
Electronic golf?
- Oh yeah. - Don't make me laugh.
Yeah, that's what I thought.
I guess it's true what they say!
Old golfers never die, they just lose their balls!
I got balls to spare, young man.
I got more balls than I know what to do with.
I'm not afraid of video golf. I'll see you in Vegas.
I'm gonna bring all my balls, all two of 'em.
Sounds good.
Ugh.
That pickle's loaded with finger sweat.
Just letting you know.
Mmm…
I like that.
No, you don't.
I'll see you in Vegas.
- I'll see you in Vegas. - Good.
- Good.
- Great.
♪ Make the world go away ♪
♪ And get it off my shoulders ♪
♪ Say the things you used to say ♪
♪ And make the world go away ♪
♪ I'm sorry if I hurt you ♪
♪ I'll make it up day by day ♪
♪ Just say you love me like you used to ♪
♪ And make the world go away ♪
♪ Make the world go away ♪
♪ And get it off my shoulders ♪
♪ Say the things you used to say ♪
♪ And make the world go away ♪